My Dying Wish
by peters.kitten
Summary: Listening to Jasper tease Edward about 'finally having a female on top of him' and hearing Edward's hissed reply from underneath my bed was more than I could take. "I've heard of monsters under the bed, but this is just ridiculous." AU, Bella x Peter
1. Chapter 1

**.**

**Jaspers POV**

**.**

"How long?"

"One minute and thirty seven seconds. The football coach caught Emmett in the hall again and Rose is waiting for him. Honestly, Emmett has turned him down five times already. You would think he'd of gotten the clue by now," Alice giggled. She kept talking, but I tuned her out.

We were standing outside the cafeteria, waiting for our 'siblings' to join us before we went inside. I casually leaned back against the wall, trying to look more human. Humans. There were humans everywhere. Delicious little morsels with the sweetest of nectar waiting just beneath the surface. All it would take for me to release it from its cage would be one quick bite. It would be so easy just to sink my teeth into any one of them.

Two of the morsels stop to talk just a few feet in front of us. One of them is a small girl with short, sandy hair. She runs her fingers through it just as the wind blows and her scent is propelled in my direction. It would be so easy...too easy.

I could see myself doing it. Pushing away from the wall. Walking up behind the girl with the sandy hair. Leaning down and in towards her, as if I was going to whisper in her ear. Letting my lips touch the fragile skin of her neck. Sinking my teeth into her and freeing the sweet nectar. Letting it pour down my throat to quench the unending hunger for a few moments. Letting it pour out of my mouth and down my body. Grabbing Alice and rubbing myself against her. Sinking my cock in her from behind as the blood flows all around us...

Edward kicked my legs, effectively knocking me out of my little daydream. I met his eyes as I felt the disgust pour from him in waves.

"Sorry," I muttered, looking down. I was ashamed. I hadn't fantasized about anything like that in a while. I don't know what came over me. Well, yes, actually I do.

Isabella Swan. She is all I've heard about all day. Whispered words and fantasies all revolving around her. She is the reason that the human males have been sending out wave after wave of lust all morning. Hence the sexual aspect to my visual indulgence.

Also, it has been two weeks. Two motherfucking weeks since I have hunted. Now I'm all for experimenting with my bloodlust and improving my control, but should we really subject a whole school full of teenage humans to my hungry, ain't been fed in two weeks, ass? No, no I think not. I don't know what Alice was thinking today.

"You weren't going to do anything," Alice murmured. "I could see that."

So it had been close; I could feel the deception in Alice's words, not to mention the grimace that Edward was trying to hold back. Damn.

"It helps if you think of them as people. Her name is Whitney. She has a baby sister that she absolutely adores. Her mother invited Esme to that garden party, remember?"

"I know who she is," I replied curtly, my tone ending the conversation. I turned my head away from them and stared toward the forest. I would have to hunt tonight. It was ridiculous to take risks like this. I wasn't some dog that you could eventually train if you kept working at it. I was a vampire who was used to feeding on whoever I wanted. The years before I met Alice were ingrained into me and there was no escaping them. It was a miracle that I could even stick to the animal diet to begin with, let alone going two weeks between feedings and still sitting in a classroom of tasty humans.

Even if I had come from a peaceful past like some vampires, it wouldn't change the fact that I'm an empath. I can feel and project emotions. So, currently, I am feeling the emotions from two other hungry vamps on top of my own. Their hunger eats away at my control. Not to mention that having a gift drains your energy faster and you have to feed more often. So, yeah, I had a lot of factors stacked against me and my control.

Rose and Emmett joined us and we all walked into the cafeteria. We had made it about half way to our table when I was hit with a shitload of emotions that literally doubled me over and came close to bringing me to my knees.

Agony.

Sadness.

Heartbreak.

Longing.

Hurt.

Rejection.

Pain.

Anger.

Betrayal.

Worthlessness.

I think there was even a little bit of love, but it was so far buried under the concoction of negative emotions that I couldn't be sure. I groaned, still doubled over, and tried to raise my head enough to look around and see who this shitstorm was coming from.

And just as quickly as it had begun, it was suddenly gone. I heard a whispered 'Sorry Jasper' and snapped my head in that direction. I was met with two big brown eyes staring at me apologetically. The owner of said eyes, a small brown-haired female, quickly lowered her head and looked away. I just kept staring, stunned. I could feel the emotions of my family and knew that they were doing the same.

"Oh my gosh, the Cullen's are totally staring at you," I heard a nasally voice whisper to the girl. That snapped us all out of it, and we quickly made our way to the table and sat down.

"What was that all about?" Rose demanded, speaking at vampire speed so she wouldn't be overheard.

"I don't know. Her emotions were so strong...they just kind of hit me. I don't know how to explain it. So many strong emotions. And then just...nothing. I can't feel anything at all from her now," I told them, probing at her once more just to make sure. Still nothing.

"She knew your name," Alice stated, looking a little lost. It was a look that I had never seen on Alice's face before. Something was definitely wrong with this situation. Edward nodded his head, agreeing with my thoughts.

"I can't hear her thoughts and Alice can't see her future," Edward murmured, staring at the girl intently, like he thought maybe that would give him some answers.

"Alice?" I questioned, because never had Alice's visions failed her like this.

"I'm trying to look into her future and I just can't. It's like she's not even there. When I look into the immediate future, I can see everyone sitting around her, but she doesn't even show up. Like I said, it's like she's not there. I don't understand..." she trailed off, at a loss for words.

"Who is she?" I found myself asking. Her emotions were so raw, so...hurt. I found myself actually feeling sympathy for the human.

"Bella Swan, Chief Swan's daughter," Edward answered. Ah, so this was the girl that had all the males stirred up.

We all sit there for a time, lost in our thoughts. I racked my brain trying to remember if I had ever seen this human before. She obviously knew me. She also obviously knew that I was an empath. Did that mean she knew we were vampires? Would we be forced to take action against this human for knowing our secret? Maybe it was simply a fluke and she had heard my name from a classmate. It was farfetched, but, then again, so was everything else that I had come up with. How had she cut her emotions off from me? How did she keep Alice and Edward out? So many questions.

Towards the end of lunch, I decided to try and send her an emotion to test whether it would work or not. I decided to send her what she had unintentionally made me feel all day. Lust. I projected a strong wave of lust at her. It seemed to surround her for a second before simply bouncing off of her. I had never experienced anything like it before. Apparently she knew what had happened, because her head snapped up and she looked me right in the eyes and glared at me. I couldn't help it; I chuckled a little. It was like watching a feisty kitten that thought it was a ferocious tiger.

The human girl, Bella, noticed my chuckle and glared harder. Then she sat up straight and smirked at me. I sent her a questioning look, right before I felt her shitstorm of emotions hit me again. I was totally unprepared. I didn't think it was possible, but her emotions were even stronger than before. It was like she was actually pushing them at me, which I suppose she was.

My head hit the table with a loud boom, startling all the humans, I'm sure. Her emotions were making me want to cut my heart out with a spoon; the heartbreak and loss she was sending was that horrendous. And then, just like before, it was suddenly gone, leaving me sitting there with my head on the cracked table, and a room full of teenage humans silently staring at us.

And then I heard her laughter; well, it was more like an evil cackle. I glanced around, wondering when the hairless cat and midget would appear, because, yeah, she was totally having a Dr. Evil moment.

"Suck on that, Jazzy," she whispered. Then she got up and walked out of the cafeteria, just as the bell rang, leaving five shocked vampires and a cracked table behind.


	2. Chapter 2

**.**

**Edwards POV**

**.**

I walked into Biology class, still reeling from lunch. The effect the human girl had on Jasper was troublesome. She brought unneeded attention to us, not once, but twice during the short lunch period. Not to mention the scuffle that Jasper had to start with Emmett so he could be 'thrown' into the table, cracking it. It couldn't seem like Jasper had actually cracked the table with his head, after all.

According to Alice's visions, Jasper and Emmett would both have to listen to a thirty minute lecture from the principal about horsing around at school. Carlisle would also have to make a small donation because of the 'destruction of school property'.

_Oh how the mighty have fallen...about time the perfect Cullen's got in trouble for something...aren't so perfect now are we...too bad it wasn't Edward, but beggars can't be choosers_

Mr. Banner's thoughts flowed into my head. Strangely, the fight made us seem more human in his eyes; less perfect, more flawed just like everyone else. I'd have to tell Alice about that. Maybe being perfect and never getting into trouble wasn't the way to go about it at all; we might actually benefit from causing a little trouble every now and then. Strange, how the human mind works.

I took my normal seat and waited for class to start. Right as the bell sounded, Bella walked in. Her eyes were red and slightly puffy. I wondered if she'd been crying, but no one else seemed to notice. She handed a slip to Mr. Banner and made her way to the only available seat. The one right next to me.

She approached cautiously, dragging her chair as far from mine as she could. She sat down slowly, watching me like a lamb would watch a lion. I smiled at her, trying to put her at ease.

"Hello. My name is Edward Cullen. I believe you know my brother, Jasper?" I said, trying to gain any information that I could from the child.

She stared at me for a moment, expression bewildered. I took a breath, to question her again, when her scent registered in my mind. Or rather, the lack of her scent registered. Nothing...just nothing. She didn't have a scent at all.

"Don't I smell good to you?" she finally blurted, her cheeks blushing a beautiful red.

"No. I can't smell you at all," I answered honestly, not thinking. And then I realized what I said... what she said. Yes, she definitely knew what we were. But how...that was the question.

"Oh," she replied, seemingly shocked. She shook her head, a thoughtful look on her face. Mr. Banner started his lesson, still gleeful from his 'Cullen got in trouble' high.

"So, how do you know Jasper? He got in trouble, you know. Brought attention to us all," I hissed, suddenly angry at the girl. She knew our secret. She could have exposed us all with her little stunt, and she knew it.

She shook her head slightly and ignored me, letting her hair fan out to create a wall between us. _That's not going to help you hide, little girl,_ I chuckled to myself. This went on the entire class; me trying to talk to her, her ignoring me. When the bell rang, I decided it was time to up my efforts. I leaned in close to her and gave her my best crooked grin. She closed her eyes and grimaced, as if in pain.

"What do you want, Edward?" she asked, eyes still closed. How peculiar that I liked the way my name sounded when it fell from her lips.

"I'm sorry. I'm being very rude, I know," I murmured softly, trying to charm her as I had countless other women. Her eyes snapped open and she looked so shocked...so hurt. It lasted only a split second before she covered it with a smirk.

"It's better if we're not friends. Trust me," she replied, studying my reaction. I was...confused. What was that supposed to mean?

"How so?" I asked, still puzzled. Were all humans this strange? She shook her head and gathered her books.

"Don't talk to me. Go find someone else to annoy. Your kind are so easily distracted after all," she said, bitterness coloring her words. Then she walked out of the classroom, but not before I saw the single tear trailing down her face.

.

**Jaspers POV**

.

I leaned against Edward's car, contemplating the best way to go about getting information from the human. The school day was finally over, and we were all waiting for Isabella to come out of Mrs. Cope's office.

"Bella," Edward murmured, glancing at me. "She likes to be called Bella."

And I would care because... I thought to him. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

"You would care because you need to be nice to her. Do you really think she'll tell you anything if you are rude to her?" he snarled, feeling agitated and a little guilty.

Ah, something happened in their class together to make him guilty. What happened, Edward? Were you rude to her? Did you hurt her feelings, perhaps make her cry? I taunted him. His guilt spiked, but he said nothing in response to my thoughts.

"So, what happened in Biology,_ brother_," I sneered, tired of his secretive bullshit. He needed to own up to his own mistakes once in a while instead of pointing out everyone else's.

He scowled at me, but ended up telling us what was said between them in Biology. She knew what we were, that much was clear. As for the weird way she acted, who knows? Humans are strange sometimes. Maybe she was one of the crazy ones. Surely they still had facilities to house the crazy ones. That could be the solution to our problem, I thought, as I watched the girl in question walk out of the office. She glanced up and smiled widely at me. Like I said, crazy.

"She does _not_ need to go to an asylum, Jasper!" Edward hissed. "She is not crazy."

Whatever. I just shrugged. I was hit with a wave of amusement from the girl. I felt no other emotions, just the amusement. It seemed she could pick and choose what she sends me. Interesting. I smirked at her and raised an eyebrow in question.

"Jasper, we're going to be great friends! I just know it!" she said in a sing song voice. She was right next to us now. "Just don't try to fuck with my emotions anymore, mmkay? It's like emotional rape...I should be allowed to feel whatever I feel, not what you think I should feel," she said as she reached out and touched my cheek. As soon as her fingers connected, a shot of lust hit me. It was so strong that it filled me, before exploding out of me and into the others surrounding me. I could practically hear the venom flowing south on all of us. My cock was throbbing; I was so hard that it was actually painful.

And then she laughed. The lust that was so strong it projected out of me without my consent, cut off just as suddenly as it had begun. And still, the crazy human laughed.

"Doesn't feel good to be manipulated does it? Doesn't feel good to have someone play games with your emotions, does it, _love_?" she sneered, looking directly at Edward. He was feeling bewildered and confused. She was feeling...well, whatever the hell she wanted to, apparently, and I couldn't feel a bit of it.

"I think I'm going to be smart for once and avoid you. Just leave me alone. Act as if I never existed," she finished with a hysterical laugh that turned into a sob. She turned around and walked over to an old, red Chevy truck. She climbed in and started the truck, wiping the tears from her face the whole time. And then she was gone, once again leaving five stunned vampires in her wake. Tell me she's not crazy now, Edward.


	3. Chapter 3

**.**

**Bella's POV**

**.**

_"Laurent! I thought you'd gone to Alaska," I cried in surprise._

_"You're right," he agreed. "I did go to Alaska. Still, I didn't expect… When I found the_

_Cullen place empty, I thought they'd moved on."_

_"They did move on," I finally managed to tell him._

_"Hmm," he murmured. "I'm surprised they left you behind. Weren't you sort of a pet of_ _theirs?"_

_"Something like that."_

_"Hmm," he said, thoughtful again._

_At that precise moment, I realized why he looked the same–too much the same. His eyes were still red. Blood red._

_I took an involuntary step back._

_"Do they visit often?" he asked, still casual, but his weight shifted toward me._

_"Lie," I heard a beautiful voice whisper. I was surprised. It wasn't Edward's voice. It was rougher, older, tinged with a slight accent._

_I listened to the voice. I lied. But it wasn't enough._

_"You must lie better than that, Kitten. Stall, just a little while longer." It was a southern accent, I realized. Wonder where my subconscious came up with that from. I even gave myself a nickname. Maybe I've finally snapped, lost the fragile hold on my sanity._

_But, still, I listened to the voice. I tried. I lied like never before. And, still, it wasn't enough. He was going to eat me. I just knew it._

_"Stall, Kitten, just a few moments longer and they'll be here. Please, stall, little one," the voice begged. So I did. I stalled. I asked about Victoria, found out he was here on her behalf. Then I begged. It did no good. I was as good as dead._

_"Run. Isabella, run. RIGHT NOW!" my voice shouted, louder than before._

_I turned and I ran. I ran even though I heard Laurent laugh. I continued running even when I heard the growls that stopped Laurent's laughter. I continued running through the terrible noises of a vampire being torn apart. Noises that I had heard once before. I just ran, falling occasionally, but getting right back up to run some more._

_I eventually made it back to my truck and headed straight home, shaking from the spent adrenaline still coursing through my body. Pulling into the yard, I noticed that Charlie was already home. He shouldn't be home yet. He should still be fishing with Harry. I jumped out of my truck; okay, more like fell out of it, and ran up the stairs and into the house._

_Red. That's the first thing that jumped out at me. Everything was red. My mind faltered, trying to protect itself from the grotesque images that my eyes were feeding it. Then, everything snapped into focus. I saw it all; cataloged it all. I saw his head, detached and sitting on top of the old television, eyes open and staring._

_I saw his torso, lying on the couch, no limbs left attached. Scratches and bite marks covered it, all oozing red. I saw the gaping hole in the center of his chest where his heart had once been. I saw his arms and legs, carelessly strewn through-out the living room. And there, on the coffee table, was a plate. A plate filled with...finger sandwiches. _

_And the red...the red was everywhere. It covered the walls, the floor...it dripped from the ceiling...it was blood. Then I saw the words, painted in his blood. "Your hearts for mine" Beside it was his heart, callously nailed to the wall, blood still dripping from it._

_Oh no...please, no...not him...not like this...Charlie...Dad..._

_I feel to my knees and screamed and screamed and screamed._

I awoke screaming. Charlie was beside me, trying to calm me. I clung to him. My dad. My Charlie. Still alive. Still breathing. And I calmed, little by little, but I never stopped clinging to him. For the first time in at least 16 years, I slept curled up beside my daddy all night long.


	4. Chapter 4

_~Previously~_

_"Doesn't feel good to be manipulated does it? Doesn't feel good to have someone play games with your emotions, does it, love?" she sneered, looking directly at Edward. He was feeling bewildered and confused. She was feeling...well, whatever the hell she wanted to, apparently, and I couldn't feel a bit of it._

_"I think I'm going to be smart for once and avoid you. Just leave me alone. Act as if I never existed," she finished with a hysterical laugh that turned into a sob. She turned around and walked over to an old, red Chevy truck. She climbed in and started the truck, wiping the tears from her face the whole time. And then she was gone, once again leaving five stunned vampires in her wake. Tell me she's not crazy now, Edward._

**Jaspers POV**

The ride home was quiet, each of us lost in our own thoughts. We arrived home and found that Carlisle was already home from the hospital. Good. We needed to discuss this with him as soon as possible. He could tell by our expressions that something was wrong. He walked into the dining room and sat down at the eastern head of the table. Esme stood beside him- they held hands on top of the table, presenting a united front, even when faced with the unknown.

Esme was feeling mostly confusion mixed with concern for her family. Carlisle had a better sense of what was coming; he had been called after the lunchroom incident. His lips were pressed tightly together and his forehead was creased. His emotions were chaotic; quickly changing from one extreme to another.

As everyone sat down, I could tell that the lines were being drawn.

Rosalie sat at the other end of the table, resolve and determination flowing from her. Emmett sat beside her, his emotions expressing uncertainty and confusion.

"We can't just kill her," Edward murmured as he took his seat beside Carlisle. Alice...Alice was the one who surprised me. She took a seat beside Rosalie, her mind already made up. 'Never bet against Alice' was one of our family mottos. However, this situation wasn't exactly black and white. Alice looked at me, impatient, and nodded her head towards the chair next to her.

I started towards her, but every step I took in her direction felt wrong. It was split 50/50. Carlisle and Esme would agree with whatever Edward wanted, we all knew that. I was the deciding vote. Could I really sentence the girl to death when she so obviously knew me and even seemed to like me? Okay, maybe like was too strong a word. Well, she liked to fuck with me, that much was certain.

I made a split second decision and switched directions. I sat down next to Edward. Alice glared at me, her eyes glazing over as the future rearranged itself to reflect my decision. She was pissed and a little...jealous? Hmm, so much for my fantasy of taking her from behind tonight. I had a feeling that I was going to be cut off for a while over this. Edward smirked and nodded his head slightly, confirming my suspicions. Damn.

Our impromptu family meeting started, and we each took turns explaining everything that had happened to Carlisle and Esme. As we all knew, Rose wanted to kill her in her sleep. Emmett just went along with Rose, and Alice just wanted her gone. No matter how. However, they were outnumbered and they all knew it.

It was decided that we would wait and see what happened, keeping a close eye on the human girl all the while. Carlisle liked and respected her father, and he knew it would devastate him if anything happened to her. Since she seemed to respond to me the best, for some unknown fucked up reason, Carlisle called the school the next morning and requested a schedule change. I was now in her Biology class instead of Edward, and the school was a hell of a lot more financially sound, thanks to the donation that Carlisle made. Money makes the world go round, after all.

School started off normal the following day; Bella ignored everyone else, but sent a smile and a wave of happiness towards me. I returned the gesture, surprised when she actually let it touch her. She had let herself feel it. She could pick and choose on that front as well. Curious.

Lunch is when things got really interesting. We were already sitting down with our 'props' when she walked through the door, closely followed by two human males. Mike and Eric, I believe were their names. Surprisingly, I could feel her emotions. She was radiating strong irritation. She stopped and glanced directly at me, causing the two mutts following too closely behind her to bump into her. She turned around and scowled at them, before giving me her full attention once again.

A slow smile spread over her face, and I was instantly on alert. That smile meant she was up to no good, and I seemed to be her favorite play toy to fuck with. She chuckled a bit, presumably at the look of horror on my face as I tried to brace myself for whatever games she wanted to play today.

"Relax, Jazzy," she breathed, lips barely moving. That just made me tense up more, which she seemed to think was extremely funny. I was just a regular comedian these days. Thing One and Thing Two were still just standing there behind her, waiting for her to choose a table.

She sent a very small wave of lust to me, and I just stared at her, confused. She rolled her eyes at me and glanced at Thing One covertly, mischief oozing from her.

"Project it at him," she whispered, barely more than a breath. So, like the dog that I was apparently becoming, I obeyed. I projected the lust at Thing One, just as Thing Two bent over to pick up something that Bella had 'accidently' thrown to the floor. So, Thing One received the lust just as Thing Two was bent over in front of him.

For as long as I walk this Earth, I will never forget the look of absolute horror on Thing Ones face as his hips thrust directly into Thing Twos ass because of the lust I had sent him. Bella was openly guffawing, watching the train wreck she had so perfectly orchestrated unfold. Thing Two stood up and whipped around, arm drawn back to punch Thing One in the face.

"Again, again!" Bella squealed excitedly, even clapping her hands together. She just barely got the words out through her laughter. This shit was just too good to pass up, so I sent another strong wave of lust, this time directed at Thing Two. His arm dropped down, and his dick got hard. Unfortunately for him, he was still wearing his gym shorts, thus ensuring that everyone could see his little problem. Sweet Hell, the looks on their faces were priceless.

At this point, the whole cafeteria was openly laughing, vampires and humans alike. Even stick-up-the-ass Edward couldn't contain his chuckles. Thing One and Two finally ran from the room, both radiating embarrassment and...curiosity? Well shit, who'd a thunk it?

"Sorry, Jessica, but I don't think Mike is going to be asking you to that dance anytime soon," Bella said to another human girl, Jessica, as she sat down beside her. She was still chuckling, waves of humor flowing from her small form.

"Yeah, I can see that," Jessica mumbled back, embarrassed. When Bella finally calmed herself down, she glanced over at me and sent a wave of appreciation mixed with a little bit of brotherly love. I raised an eyebrow at that, because, yeah, I didn't know we were quite on those terms just yet. Hell, I just made the decision not to kill her in her sleep last night, for petes sake. She just shrugged, and went back to eating her human slop.

"I think I like her," Emmett sighed, lost in thought. From the level of mischief he was radiating, I could only assume he was thinking about all the pranks they could pull together. Edward just shook his head and muttered, "She's human, Emmett. That last one would probably kill her."

"Yeah, but what a way to die," Emmett chuckled. Alice huffed and got up from the table. Rose followed her, and they both stormed off, irritation flowing freely from them both. I sighed. Damn. There goes any chance of me getting any ass anytime this week. Oh well, Emmett was likely to be in the same boat as I was. At least I would have a chess partner.

The bell rang and I made my way over to Bella, figuring that I could at least walk her to Biology. She did give me a good laugh, after all. She smiled at me, and offered me her hand. I just stared at her, starting to get disturbed. Surely she wasn't making a play for me. Didn't she know I was with Alice?

"Calm down, my heart. I think I've fallen in love with a pale, white, knight." She laughed at my horrified expression, before retracting her hand.

"Sheesh, relax, Jasper. Can't you take a joke? I assure you I have absolutely no romantic intentions toward you. We will eventually be family, though," she said, thoughtful expression on her face.

"How so?" I asked, grabbing her hand and dragging her towards the Biology room. She had information that I wanted, and the only way I would be able to get it is to get over my qualms and make nice with the human. No, not 'the human'. Bella, I reminded myself. Somehow, I don't think referring to her as 'the human' would make her want to spill her secrets to me.

"What are you doing?" she asked, totally ignoring my previous question. I had just taken my seat beside her at our desk.

"Sitting. Same as you," I deadpanned. She smiled and shook her head.

"Why are you sitting, same as me, in my Biology class? Shouldn't Fuckward be here annoying me, instead?"

"Fuckward, huh?" I chuckled. "What do you have against him, anyway? As far as I can tell, he's never done anything to you." I hadn't even noticed that she was still letting me feel her emotions, until I felt her overwhelming shitstorm of negative emotions encompass me. I unintentionally gasped, and she cut everything off from me once again.

"No. I don't suppose he has yet, has he?" she whispered weakly. I wanted to question her further, but Mr. Banner chose that moment to begin his lesson.

.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~.

The rest of the week went much the same; Bella would stubbornly ignore all of my family, except me, and I spent my time trying to gain any information from her that I could. The only thing that I really gained was the knowledge that Bella was truly a little bit crazy. I had already known this, of course, but Bella seemed determined to reaffirm my beliefs.

_It was Thursday morning, and we had just pulled into the school. I saw Bella sitting in her truck, and I could feel the mischief and excitement rolling from her direction. I was instantly cautious, getting out of Edwards Volvo and walking slowly towards her. She smiled at me and hopped out of her truck, big wrapped box in hand._

_"Here. I bought you something," she said excitedly, thrusting the box at my stunned form. I cautiously took the package and examined it. It was a large box, wrapped in pink playboy bunny wrapping paper, with a large silver bow on it. It also smelled, badly._

_"Stop looking at it like it's gonna bite you," she laughed. "Quite the opposite, in fact. Open it," she demanded, pushing a wave of impatience at me. So I opened it._

_"I brought you lunch!" she exclaimed proudly, as I stared in horror at the rabbit cowering away from me in the corner of the box._

_"I told you it wouldn't bite you, but you can sure bite it! Mmm, Mmm, Good! "She said, rubbing her stomach. And then she walked off, laughing, leaving me standing there holding the box._

The next few days came and went, going down much in the same fashion. It was the following Tuesday that the shit hit the fan.


	5. Chapter 5

_Previously_

_And the red...the red was everywhere. It covered the walls, the floor...it dripped from the ceiling...it was blood._

_Oh no...please, no...not him...not like this...Charlie...Dad..._

_I feel to my knees and screamed and screamed and screamed._

**Bella's POV**

_I don't know how long I stayed there, kneeling, sobs racking my body. I just kept staring at the wall through blurry, tear-filled eyes. I knew exactly who wrote those words. This was all my fault. Charlie was dead because of me. Because of my choices, I was a killer. A murderer of the worst kind. My own father...and it was all my fault._

_I wanted to die. I wanted the sweet peace that death could offer me. I stood up and walked to the corner where Charlie kept his gun. He had shown me once before how it worked; gun safety, he had called it. He firmly believed that fewer accidents would happen if more people were informed. He was right, of course. What I was fixing to do would be no accident._

_I methodically loaded the gun and made sure the safety was off. This was it. Forgive me, I pleaded as I stuck the gun in my mouth. I was a mere second away from pulling the trigger when the blood painted words replayed in my mind. Your hearts for mine. Not heart, but hearts...plural. No. Renee. She planned on killing my mother._

_I carefully put the safety back on the gun and set it on the floor. Then I ran to the kitchen, towards the phone. There, sitting on top of the phone, was a folded up piece of paper with my name on it._

_Still in shock, I slowly grabbed the note and unfolded it open. It was from her, of course. Victoria. Who else would it be from, I thought bitterly._

_Bella_

_Hope this note finds you well, unlike your poor father. It was all your fault, you know. Because of you, my precious James was taken from me. So now I have taken someone precious from you. I, however, fail to call your debt absolved. The lifespan of one mere human could never compare to the length of time I would have had with my James, if not for you. So, I suppose we are at an impasse. You still owe me a heart, my dear Bella. The heart you give me, I will leave up to you. I would really prefer yours, but I suppose your mothers would do. I have already tracked her down, you know. By the time you read this, I will probably be watching her from the shadows. Stalking my prey, if you will._

_You know it really was unfortunate that your little friend didn't make it. I must say that I was impressed. He took out my entire newborn army. Almost every single one. He, however, failed to see me. I caught him by surprise and took him out quickly. Another death on your head, Bella. They certainly are racking up, aren't they? Every single pathetic human I turned into a vampire lost their life because of you. But, enough of that, back to your little friend. It could have easily ended in a catastrophe for me, but taking him out while he was distracted with my newborns gave me an idea._

_I have been trying to get to you for weeks- did you know that? I simply couldn't get past all your guard dogs. But then Laurent showed up and my decision was made. He would be my distraction. Of course, he didn't know he was to be cannon fodder at the time, or I'm sure he would have never agreed to it. So, while your guard dogs were busy with him, I was busy with your father. His last words were pleas for me not to hurt you. He loved you even at the end. How poetic, don't you think?_

_Whose heart will you choose- yours or your mothers? Hurry, or I may just take them both. I'll be in touch._

_~Victoria_

_I dropped the note and grabbed the phone. I dialed my mother's cell and waited. It rang and rang, before going to voice mail. I hung up and sank to my knees. What if she already had her? What if she'd already killed her? I lost myself in my morbid thoughts, and was startled when the phone rang._

_"Mom?" I answered, praying that it was her._

_"Bella? Oh honey, I'm sorry. My phone was buried in my purse and I couldn't find it in time," she laughed. "I was just fixing to call you anyway. Guess what? I just ran into one of your old friends. She said she hasn't seen you in ages. Oh, here, she wants to talk to you. Isn't it just a small world?" she laughed, passing the phone to my 'old friend'._

_"Hello, Bella," Victoria purred. "It's so nice to talk to you again. We simply must catch up. It feels like it's been ages!" I could hear my mom laughing in the background, no idea of the danger she was truly in._

_"You win, Victoria. You can have me. Just, please, leave my mother alone. Please," I begged, not caring how desperate I sounded. She laughed, enjoying my misery._

_"I'll be coming to Seattle real soon, Bella. Do you possibly think you could meet me there? I'd love to catch up."_

_"Yes, anything. I'll leave right now. Where do you want to meet at? It will take me a while to get there." I was gibbering, desperately trying to find the words that would get Victoria away from my mother._

_"Oh, I'll find you," she promised, hanging up the phone. I grabbed my keys and ran out the door, leaving a trail of bloody footprints all the way to my truck._

I started awake, gasping for breath. It was alright. Renee was just fine, happily traveling with Phil. We were all okay. We were safe. Just put it out of your mind, Bella. You can do this, I told myself.

I caught my breath and glanced at the clock. Shit. I forgot to set the alarm. If I didn't hurry, I was going to be late for school. Good thing I wasn't clumsy anymore. One thing I could thank the bitch for, I suppose.


	6. Chapter 6

**Jaspers POV** - - - - - **Tuesday Morning**- - - - - - - - -

I smiled as I watched Bella park her monstrosity of a truck, wondering what fuckery she would pull today. We were all leaning up against Edward's Volvo, which was parked four cars down from Bella.

She gracefully hopped out of her truck, reminding me of the rabbit she brought me last week, which was currently living a life of luxury outside of our house. For some maniacal reason, I just couldn't bring myself to get rid of Bella's present to me. I even went as far as to name the damn thing- Lunch. Esme didn't want it in her house, so Emmett built it its own 'deluxe rabbit hutch', which suspiciously resembled an outhouse. Yes, there was even a little crescent moon carved on the door.

Bella walked around her truck, coming towards me, and then froze when something on the tire caught her eye. My smile faded as the blood drained from her face and she looked up at me, totally horrified. I didn't see what the big deal was, it was just snow chains.

"Son of a bitch. I forgot. I totally freaking forgot," she whispered, gaze distant, fixed on some far away spot towards the road. She turned to look at me once more, and I was unnerved by the sheer terror in her eyes.

"Jasper, get me away from this truck! I swear I'll answer your questions, just please get me the fuck away from this truck!" She opened herself up to me, and I was consumed with her emotions; she was completely panicked and absolutely terrified. She was serious. She wasn't just fucking around.

I ran to her at vampire speed, quickly grabbing her up and depositing her back down beside the Volvo. I heard Alice and Edward gasp, and watched in shock as a dark blue van skidded out of control on the ice and crashed into the back of Bella's truck. Right where she had been standing only a second before. It curled around the end of the truck and, still spinning and sliding, crashed directly into the tan car that was parked next to Bella.

"You knew," I whispered to Bella after a few seconds of stunned silence. She nodded once, silent tears dripping from her eyes and streaking down her face. I wrapped my arms around her, trying to comfort her. I assumed the tears were from her near death experience, but, as always, Bella proved my assumptions wrong.

"My precious! He killed my precious! My poor truck!" she wailed, tears still falling.

"Okay, are you seriously crying over your beast of a truck? And did you really just call it 'my precious'?" I asked her, a surprised chuckle escaping from me.

"Don't diss the truck!" she hissed, pulling out of my arms and running towards her 'precious'. She bypassed the wreck, bypassed the injured human, and threw herself at the front of her monstrosity, giving it a huge hug, her tiny hands caressing it lovingly. She then proceeded to coo at it and promised it that 'Mommy will have you fixed and make you all better.'

Humans were screaming, sirens were quickly approaching, and chaos reigned all around us. But did my family or I notice? No, we paid it no mind. We were too busy watching Bella molest her...precious. She had actually climbed up on the hood at this point and was splayed out over the top of it, kissing it. I do believe I even saw some tongue. Even the damn truck was getting more action than me. Fuck my life.

"We need answers, Jasper," Alice said solemnly, still staring at our human freak-show. I just nodded in agreement. Edward turned to an angry Rose, and assured her that no one had noticed my little speed stunt. She was still pissed, but I really couldn't find it in myself to give a fuck.

I growled quietly as Bella was yanked off the top of her truck by a human male. I didn't even realize that I had already started in that direction, until Edward grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

"It's just her father, Jasper. See," he murmured, as I saw the human male, Bella's father, encircle her in a hug. He then held her back from him and proceeded to inspect her for damages.

"He's checking for injuries," Edward chuckled. "'Inspecting for damages' makes it sound like she's a fragile package or something, not a human." Whatever.

"She is a fragile package," I whispered, speaking more to myself than anyone else. I felt my families shock, and realized what I had just said. It was true, though. I was attached to the fragile little human girl. To Bella. Sometime during the last week of fuckery, I had become attached. Congratulations, it's a girl. I blamed it on the rabbit.

I ignored my family's reaction, and started walking towards Bella, Edward trailing not far behind me. Bella was arguing with her father.

"But, Dad, I am not hurt! I do not need to go to the hospital! I wasn't even close! "She exclaimed.

"Just a check-up, Bella. To be sure," he pleaded, embarrassment overtaking him when he noticed we were listening.

"No! I do want to go home though. I'm an emotional wreck from witnessing the death of my truck. I think that earns me a day off from school. Besides, what if I get PTSD or some shit? What if I get a flashback of my poor baby getting crushed? Do you really want me to possibly lose it and go crazy at school? Huh, do you?" she asked dramatically, emotions smug because she knew that she would get her way. Crafty little human even gave him the puppy dog eyes, blinking twice so tears would fall at just the right moment.

"Watch your language," he muttered, his ears tingeing pink from embarrassment. "It was just a truck, Bella. We'll get it fixed or get you a new one."

"But it was from you Dad, that's why it's so special," Bella told him quietly, sincerity and love radiating from her. I felt a strong burst of love come from her father as he enveloped her in another hug. He pulled away and wiped his eyes quickly, even more embarrassed because of his tears, but still feeling pride and love for his daughter.

"Can you take me home?" Bella asked him.

"I have to go to the hospital first, Bella. If you want to go with me, I could take you home afterwards, and since you'd already be there..." he trailed off, still trying to get Bella to have a check-up.

"Uh. I'm fine," she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. A new group of parents had arrived, one of them yelling out to Charlie. He gave Bella one last hug, before taking off in that direction.

"I can take you home, Bella. If that's okay," Edward offered quickly. Bella looked at me and sent me a wave of apprehension and unease. I nodded my head in agreement to her unspoken question. I would be going, as well.

"Alright. Thanks, I guess," she muttered, and took off towards Charlie to tell him.

"What are you doing?" I asked Edward quietly, not wanting Bella to overhear.

"We need answers, Jasper. Just because you like her, doesn't mean that she isn't a threat to us," he hissed, emotions raging. He was angry and... jealous. Could he seriously be jealous of my friendship, if that's even what you'd call it, with Bella?

"Yes," he hissed, answering my thoughts. "She should like me, not you. I just don't understand why she doesn't like me." He was feeling inadequate; left out, like the last kid picked for the team.

"So, you want her to like you, not because you want to be friends with her, but because everyone should like you? That's petty even for you, Edward." Do you even like her? Are you really interested in becoming her friend? Or is she just some twisted science experiment to you?

"She intrigues me. I can't figure her out. She's unique and different from everyone else. I can't hear her thoughts. I want to know her better," he admitted honestly, aggressively running his fingers through his hair.

Bella chose that moment to rejoin us, silently taking my hand and leading me towards the Volvo. Edward had a brief conversation with Alice, before joining us as well. As soon as we pulled out of the parking lot, he started in on Bella. Question after question fell from his lips, and silence was the only answer he received. Bella sat quietly, staring out the window, totally ignoring Edward's presence.

When we pulled up at her house, she smiled at me and sent me a wave of gratitude and appreciation. She murmured a quick "Thanks" to Edward and went to get out of the car.

"You promised us answers, Bella," Edward growled impatiently, grabbing the sleeve of her shirt to try and keep her in the car. Bella jerked her arm away, the bottom of her shirt sleeve ripping slightly because Edward was still holding it. That was when we saw it; a bite mark covered the skin just below her wrist. A vampire bite mark. Edward and I both gasped in surprise.

"Yeah, I know all about your kind- intimately," Bella hissed, yanking her door open and jumping out. She made it all the way to her porch before she turned back around and stared at the car.

"Please, don't tell the others. I don't need or want pity from any of you. I'm trusting you two not to say anything. I will never forgive you if you do," she whispered. Shocked, we could only nod in compliance. She nodded back once, turned, and walked through her front door.

"What the fuck?" I asked no one in particular. What the fuck had happened to her? What the fuck had caused her not to become a vampire? What the fuck did she have to do to survive that? What the fuck, indeed.

"Yeah. I second that," Edward sighed, pulling out onto the road. "We're coming back here tonight."

"Yes. Yes, I suppose we are," I answered, because, honestly, what else was there to say.


	7. Chapter 7

**Bella POV**

**.**

I was startled awake from yet another nightmare plagued sleep, only to realize that I wasn't alone. Though they didn't realize it, I could hear and understand their hushed words uttered at vampire speed. Another thing I could thank the bitch for, I suppose.

They were both currently in my closet, arguing over who got there first. From what I picked up, the loser was going to have to hide under my bed. Fucking vampires. You would think that out of all the creatures in the world, they would be the ones who most understood personal space. But, no, I have to lay here and listen as Edward loses the argument and agrees to relocate as soon as 'the human' closes her eyes for long enough.

The human. That is what I have apparently become to him. Oh how high up the pedestal is when you fall from it. Not that he knew that I had fallen from it. Hell, not that he even knew that he had once placed me atop it.

Listening to Jasper tease Edward about 'finally having a female on top of him' and hearing Edward's hissed reply from underneath my bed was more than I could take. I needed to man the fuck up and put my big girl panties on. Gah, even my thoughts are full of contradictions these days. I sat up, shaking my head.

"Oh, look, my own personal stalkers. Am I supposed to be feeling honored right now?"

No answer. Not even a hiss. No manners, these two.

"Don't tell me you guys broke in here just to watch me sleep, because, yeah, that's kind of creepy even for you two."

I silently watched as my closet door slid open and Jasper stepped out. At least he had the good grace to look sheepish. I waited for Edward to join him, but Edward always had been the difficult one. Asshole thought the world revolved around him. After about thirty seconds or so, my patience ran out and I'm left feeling totally awkward just sittin' here staring at Jasper. I turned to the one thing that had always been there for me, the number one defense system for my poor pathetic ass human self. Sarcasm.

"Look, Edward, I've heard of monsters under the bed, but this is just ridiculous."

Jasper chuckled and Edward shot out from under the bed like someone had stepped on his tail. Not that he had a tail. Well, he had a tail end, but not an actual tail...damn the proverbial cat that made me think of that metaphor. Not the best time to have a brain fart, Bella.

_Also not the best time to be referring to yourself in third person, either. People might start to think you're crazy._

Psst, I passed crazy months ago. Am I not, at this very moment, having a conversation with myself inside my head? I'd say that sidesteps crazy and moves straight into 'mad as a March hair' territory.

_Did you know the definition of crazy is 'mentally strange'? I've gotta tell you, you are soo mentally strange. I should know, I live in your head. It's a hostile environment; very dog-eat-dog._

Yes, I am well aware. It is my head that we are discussing, after all. So now that we have established that I am crazy, bonkers, berserk, batshit, deranged, demented, everlastingly out to lunch, nutty as a fruitcake, and mad as a hatter, can we please get back to the real issue at hand- the two vamps staring at me like I might actually come off this bed and bite _them_? Please?

_Roger, that. Over and out._

Well, now that that's taken care of...back to the two dead fuckers in my room.

_Technically, Jaspers the only 'dead fucker' since Edward still has his v-card. A house full of nude playboy vampire bunnies couldn't yank that sucker away from his prude ass._

True. Hmm...vampire bunnies...could be interesting. Count Bunniculas, maybe?

_Yeah, and they could do all the fuckin they wanted without worrying about lil bunpires running around. Think of all the carrots it would save. It could be the end of world hunger!_

Oh, shut it, you! Now, back to the two vampires.

The two vampires in question were still standing at the foot of my bed, staring. Just staring. Like they didn't just get caught hiding in my room, after breaking into my house. Uh, stupid vampires.

"Can I help you?" I asked, trying to speed things along. Yeah, I'm nice like that.

"How do you know us?" Edward finally demands, having the nerve to actually bare his teeth at me. Psst, like that would scare me. I've faced worse teeth than yours, squirrel muncher. Felt them slicing through my skin, ripping my flesh apart...Stop it, Bella! Focus!

"Scary. Very scary. Are you forgetting that I just watched you crawl out from under my bed like a cute wittle puppy. Don't make me get my newspaper and swat you on the nose."

"Cute," Edward bit out, scowling as Jasper laughed. "How do you know us?"

Uh. That again. I threw myself back on the bed and rubbed my eyes.

"You woke me up for that. Seriously? Couldn't it have waited until tomorrow?"

"Why won't you answer any of my questions?" Edward asked, pinching his nose in frustration. I seemed to do that a lot now, frustrate him. Seems the tables are turned, this time around.

"Because you're the one asking them?" I muttered under my breath, which shocked a laugh out of Jasper and earned me another scowl from Edward.

"Alright, I'll bite. How do you know about us, darlin?" Jasper asked. Shit, I hadn't actually worked out what I was going to tell them. It damn sure wouldn't be the whole truth, that much I knew. And when the hell did I graduate from 'the human' to 'darlin'? Really, they should tell me these things.

"Depends. 'Us' as in vampires or 'us' as in you, personally," I finally said, trying to stall long enough to figure out what I was going to say.

Um, yeah, I knew you all before and you stupid vampire motherfuckers used me as a game and a distraction, and then left me to face the aftermath of being introduced to the supernatural word without so much as a fuck you? Well, Edward, you actually did give me a fuck you, I suppose, if saying that I wasn't good enough and that you never loved me like I thought could be constituted as a fuck you.

_Yeah, somehow, I don't think it would go over very well if you spouted that shit at them._

Finally, we are in total agreement. Shouldn't I be feeling all Zen and shit now?

"Me, Bella. You have known about me and my abilities since the first day in the cafeteria and I want to know how," Jasper growled stalking over to me. Touchy, touchy. Someone wasn't getting any.

"I also want to know about this," he said, as he grabbed my shirt sleeve and yanked it up. I assume he was just trying to unveil the scar that they had seen earlier, James bite mark, but his harsh yank ripped my sleeve off, exposing the entire length of my arm. He got to see much more than the one scar he bargained for. He growled and jerked back, staring at me in horror.

"What the hell happened to you, Bella?" he hissed, backing up another step, the look of pure horror and disgust plain for all to see.

Now I was already terribly self-conscious about my scars, but seeing his reaction just confirmed how awful they must look to perfect vampire eyes. What if my angel didn't want me because of them? What if he, too, found me disgusting?

_Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Bella. They will always be there and there is nothing you can do about it. Accept it. Move on._

I looked up at Jasper and was suddenly furious. Who the hell was he to judge me for my scars?

"What's wrong, Jasper? Do they disgust you? You haven't even seen the half of it," I said bitterly, as I jerked the remains of my sweater off, leaving me sitting there in a tank top, and exposing every last one of the dozens of scars that littered both of my arms.

"They are horrible aren't they? Trust me, I know. I have to see them every fucking day of my life. Every time I look at one it's like I'm right back in that fucking room with that bitch. So, yeah, I know they're horrible and disgusting, but, honestly, I would have thought that you'd be the last one to judge my scars, Jasper. You know all about bitches and scars, don'tcha _darlin_," I hissed, making the last word as sarcastic as possible. I had jumped up off the bed and was standing in front of him at this point.

"So don't you dare fucking judge me, Jasper Whitlock. Pot meet the fucking kettle," I hissed harshly, punctuating each word with a poke to Jaspers chest. I was breathing raggedly, gasping for every breath. I looked up into Jaspers stunned face and finally realized what I was doing.

I backed off in a daze, sitting down on the bed and mumbling, "Wonderful. Just freaking wonderful. I just poked the fucking God of war in the chest. Way to go, Bella. Brilliant, just freaking brilliant. Angels gonna get a kick out of this."

"Bella, I didn't mean anything like that. I was just horrified that someone could do that to you." He spoke quietly and approached me hesitantly, like I was a skittish animal. Or a crazy person. And then he held me as I broke down, racking sobs exploding from me as I finally let go.

I cried for the family that I lost, the love that would never be, the ignorance of youth that I'd never regain. I mourned the death of my father, for even if he was alive once again, he had died and I never got to grieve like my fragile human self needed to. I cried for my scars; shed multiple tears for each and every damned one of them, for they were a reminder of things past, innocence lost.

And I cried for Peter, my precious angel who wasn't here to hold me and tell me it would all be okay. I missed him. Sweet Hell, how I missed him. I didn't know how much longer I could wait. I felt so alone among these people who used to be my family. People who threw me away like a used tissue. People who didn't even remember doing it. People who didn't even remember me. People who I needed to forget, because things were different now. I would never have the same relationship with any of them that I did before, so I needed to stop viewing them differently because of it. I needed to let it go. Just let it all go.

But, like so many things, it was much easier said than done, which became increasingly apparent when I flinched away from the barest brush of Edwards fingers against my arm. I knew he meant it to be comforting, but it was anything but. That touch reminded me of a thousand other touches and I lost it again. The sobs that had trickled down to nothing suddenly came back with a vengeance.

Jasper growled at Edward, and for some reason that just made it worse. Suddenly he stiffened and groaned quietly. After a few seconds, I realized that I had accidently let my shield thin. Jasper was getting a firsthand taste of what I was feeling, and it was hurting him. I immediately strengthened my shield, swaying slightly from the energy that it took to do so, and mumbled a quiet, "Sorry Jasper" before burying my face back into the fabric of his shirt.

"Shh, it's okay, Bella," he soothed, awkwardly running his fingers through my hair in what I'm sure he meant to be a soothing motion. It was actually that action that snapped me out of my self-pity and back into logical thought again. Jasper was comforting me. The fucking Major, one of the most feared vampires of all times, was sitting here petting my head like a kitten to try and reassure me. I suddenly wondered if I should purr to let him know I appreciated it.

And with that thought, the laughter took me. I laughed until I hiccupped. The same 'oh shit she's crazy' look that I'd seen multiple times before, was back on Jaspers face. It just made me laugh all the harder. Finally, I got myself under control. I was exhausted both physically and emotionally. I could feel my shield waver, thin spots forming that allowed Jasper to feel my each and every emotion . He sent me some calm that I gratefully accepted, before glancing down and locking gazes with me.

He looked away quickly and murmured too soft for normal human ears to hear, "I don't know what it is about you, Bella, but your different." I snorted at that and he must have felt my amusement, because he sent me a wave of curiosity. He didn't know I'd heard him. I just shook my head and yawned.

"Look, Jasper, it's been fun and all, and I enjoy having an emotional breakdown just as much as the next girl, but I'm exhausted. I need some sleep and Charlie will be getting up soon to get ready for work so..." I trailed off, not really knowing a nice way of saying 'get the fuck out and leave me alone', but sending Jasper a silent apology nonetheless.

I snuggled down into my covers and glanced around the room, noticing for the first time that Edward wasn't here anymore. Jasper felt my curiosity and told me he had left a while ago.

"Yeah, he's good at leaving, isn't he?" I mumbled as my eyes closed and I drifted off to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Bella POV**

**.**

_Meow, meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow, meow. Meeooowwwww. _

The fuck?

_Meow, meow, meow, meow. Meow, meo_-**BANG**!

"Fucking cat alarm clock," I groaned, pulling the covers higher over my head. Fucking little old lady behind the counter suckered me in with her half-off spew.

_Yes, if by 'suckered you in', you mean that she wouldn't shut the fuck up and let you leave until you bought the damn thing. But it was half price..._

True.

_Oh, who are you kidding, the old hag unwittingly guilted you into it and you know it._

I sighed as I recalled my pet store visit from Hell. All I wanted to do was buy Jasper dinner. It seemed like a simple concept at the time. Go in the pet store. Choose a bunny. Pay. Go home. Simple, right? Apparently not, because fate, the fickle bitch that she is, has decided that nothing can ever be simple for Bella Swan.

_And there you go using third person again. My crazy meter is beeping._

_.~~~~~~~._

The pet store only had one rabbit, and it was a scrawny motherfucker. I sized it up and decided that there just wasn't enough meat on its bones for a proper dinner; less meat, less blood and all that. I briefly considered buying him a cat, but quickly decided that I really didn't need to be feeding Jasper pussy. I am a lady, after all.

_Yeah, and I'm Monica Lewinsky. And, yes, Bill, you soo totally did._

So, the scraggly rabbit it was. It could be a lite lunch, I supposed. Choice made, I walked up to the counter to make my purchase. See, simple. Go. Choose. Pay. There was only one worker in the small pet shop; a LOL. Little old lady.

I spent five seconds telling her that I wanted to buy the rabbit; she spent fifteen minutes telling me how she had 'rescued' it and bottle-fed it from birth. It was special to her, and she was glad it was going to a good home where someone would take care of it.

_Oh, Jasper will take care of it alright. Truer words have never been spoken._

I pushed my slight guilt away, and pulled my cash from my pocket. Box it up, ma'am, I'm taking it to-go. She grabbed the money from my hand, and then proceeded to tell me about her 'bargain bin' special: a Meow-Mix alarm clock. I very politely declined, but she just kept going on and on about it. I was almost to the point where I just said 'fuck it', and bought the damn thing, when she finally shut up about it. She gave me my change, and went to go box up the bunny.

"Look, you're going home with this nice young lady. She'll be your new Mama now, and she'll love you and cherish you," she murmured to it, actually kissing the damn thing on its floppy ears.

_Are we marrying the fucking thing, now? _

"You certainly did live up to your name. Didn't you, Hope?"

Hope. The damned (literally) bunny was named Hope. I sighed and pulled another twenty out of my pocket. Guess I was getting that clock after all.

.~~~~~~.

I dramatically threw the covers off my head, grinning in delight when I saw the clock was smashed into a million tiny pieces. He must have hit it hard, to have destroyed it so thoroughly. I stared into his golden eyes and gave him my best maniacal grin.

"Was my pussy not to your liking, Jasper?"


	9. Chapter 9

**Bella POV**

**.**

"Was my pussy not to your liking, Jasper?"

...5 seconds...

...10 seconds...

...15 seconds...

_You know, he really does do a fantastic fish expression._

Yes. Yes, he does.

_Open mouth. Close mouth. Open. Close. Wonder what he'd do if you stuck something in there?_

Hush, you. I'm staring right at him; I don't need a play by play. What would I stick in there, anyway?

_Oh, I dunno. Where's Mike Newton at when you need him? I'm sure he could think of something..._

Okay, that's just wrong. Even for you, that's just...uh.

_*giggles* _

...30 seconds...

...35 seconds...

...45 seconds...

_I think you've fried his poor little kitty brain._

Yes. Yes, I think I did.

...60 seconds...

...90 seconds...

_I've got it!_

Well, I'm glad someone does. What, pray tell, do you have?

_Steak!_

You have steak? That's...nice.

_You are such an idiot! Put a piece of steak in his mouth. *chuckles evilly*_

Okay, still not following you. Why steak?

_Because he apparently doesn't like pussy, maybe he'll like some tube steak. *snickers*_

Gah! Just...gah! Not listening!

_But..._

No! Not listening. La la la.

...120 seconds...

...180 seconds...

Ok, should I try the steak?

_What, you're listening to me now? Should I feel honored, oh great one?_

Shut it! And yes, I am. We have a steak in the fridge...

...480 seconds...

_Just stick it in his mouth already! You've already cut it to the proper size. *snickers*_

So I have. I just...don't know if I should. What if he bites the hand that feeds him? What then?

_In the words of Nike: Just do it!_

Okkaayyyyyy.

.

**Jaspers POV**

**.**

What the fuck? Just, what the fuck?_ Was my pussy not to your liking, Jasper?_ Seriously. Did she just say that? I mean, hell, what the fuck do I say to that? I don't want to offend her, obviously. She's crazy. If I offended her, she might light my ass on fire. I can just see her pulling out a Zippo. Plus, I just shattered her clock into 483 pieces. I'm sure she's not happy about that, but, fuck, if I had to listen to one more "Meow" I was going to fucking come unglued.

How the hell did I get here? I stayed here all night long, sending her some peaceful vibes to ward off the shitstorm of negative emotions that she was constantly throwing off. I figured that she'd be grateful for it, and maybe, just fucking maybe, I'd get a few of those promised answers.

But, no, I had to go and smash her meowing monstrosity. I mean, seriously, who the fuck wants to wake up to the sounds of a bitch in heat? I made it through 15 fucking meows, before I obliterated the damn thing. I pride myself on control.

And now she wants to know if her pussy is to my liking or not? What the fuck? Who asks shit like that anyway? Crazy little human girls, that's who...And what the fuck is in my mouth?

.

**Bella's POV**

**.**

"What the fuck?" he finally manages, spitting the long tubular-shaped piece of steak out of his mouth. I snickered. I couldn't help it. He bent down and slowly picked my masterpiece up off the floor.

"I-is this supposed to be what I think it is?" he stutters, horrified, and damn, I just made a vampire stutter. I feel so proud.

"Tube steak!" I exclaim, proudly, with a bit of a demented chuckle leaking out. He tosses the offending piece of steak away, and stares at me like I'm the crazy bitch that I am.

"Mad as a fucking hatter," he murmurs, still staring at me. "Tube steak, huh?"

"Well, you didn't seem to appreciate my pussy, although you did bang the hell out of it, didn't you?"

"I...you...Fuck!" he huffs, pulling at his hair. He doesn't know how to handle me or this situation. Hmm...should I help him out?

"Don't fry your little kitty brain over this, Jasper. I did it once and the smell was awful."

"Little kitty brain?" he chuckled, shaking his head warily at me. "Yes, well, somehow I don't doubt that. I don't think your mind ever recovered."

_No. No, it did not. _

"I'm sorry about the clock. It was just... meowing and...you don't even want to know how loud it was to my ears." I winced in sympathy. I understand better than you think.

"You just happened to get to the damn thing before I did. Its fate would have been the same regardless," I told him, letting him feel my honestly.

_Nine lives, my ass!_

"So, I know you're going to pester me for answers and all, but I really need a human moment first. And then I need to hunt. Captain Crunch is getting slow in his old age, should be easy prey."

_I've always wanted to eat a pirate!_

You are one sick bitch. Have you even seen Captain Crunch? He's crusty old.

_True. How about Lucky Charms? That leprechaun is magically delicious, after all. Plus, he's miniature, fun-sized even. Think about it...he wouldn't even have to kneel to lick your-_

Shut up! Gah! Besides, if I was shopping for midgets, I would so go for Rice Crispies. There are three of them after all.

_Oh, the possibilities..._

You naughty little slut!

_If the shoe fits..._

"Pee. Shower. Dress. Eat," I muttered, trying to get my mind out of the cereal gutter.

"So glad you have your priorities straight, darlin," Jasper chuckled. I scowled at him.

"Don't make me get my Zippo," I teased. I didn't think it was possible, but his face seemed to pale even more than usual. Well Hell, I was just joking. I sent him a wave of humor, grabbed my clothes, and headed for the bathroom.

.~~~~~~~~~~~~~.

An hour later I was sitting at the kitchen table, finishing up my breakfast date with Tony. After all, who could resist a tiger that could only speak two words: Your Greatttt! He could teach a few men a lesson or two, that's for sure. Jasper was sitting next to me, watching me feed. The way his face kept scrunching, I couldn't tell if he was amused or disgusted. Probably a little of both.

I took my bowl to the sink, and rinsed it out. Time to own up to my promise of answers... or at least some well-constructed lies. Couldn't have him knowing all of my secrets, now could I? I walked back up to my bedroom in silence, Jasper trailing behind me like a warden. Is this what criminals feel like when they walk to the electric chair?

_The electric chair was invented by a dentist. Think on that the next time you go to have your teeth cleaned._

I sat down on my bed, and Jasper took the rocking chair. I leaned back against the bed frame and wrapped my arms around a pillow. Silence descended as we both stared at each other.

"Ask away," I finally mumbled, ready to get this over with. He took a deep breath and nodded his head. Let's see what horror he makes me relive first.

Just as he opened his mouth to speak, we were startled by Edward jumping in through my bedroom window. "We need answers," were the first words out of his mouth.

"You can't just jump in here and expect to have it your way. What the fuck do I look like- Burger King? My world does not revolve around your wants and needs, Edward." _Not anymore._

"Bella," he murmured to me, like I'm some unruly child, "We just need to know a few things. There are rules in the vampire world, and vampires who enforce them. You wouldn't want to get us in any trouble, now would you?" _Honey may catch more flies than vinegar, but I am not a fucking fly and that shit will not ensnare me, Edward!_

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn," I muttered, knowing even as I uttered the words that they weren't true. I did care. These people left me for dead and turned my life into a living Hell for months, and I still cared. I am truly fucked in the head.

_No arguments here._

"Bella," he admonished. "Just listen t-"

"No, you listen to me for once, Edward Cullen!" I cut him off. "I will not have you come in here and scold me like some damn disobedient puppy. I am a human being, Edward. Human. You can't just force your way into my life, and then pick up and leave when something else tickles your fancy. You can't. I won't let you, not this time. Go find your distractions elsewhere, because I will not be one of them. Never again," I finished softly, knowing that I'd revealed too much.

"W-what?" he asked, throwing a glance at Jasper to see if he understood any of the shit that came spewing from my mouth. Jasper just shrugged and turned back to me, sending me a small wave of curiosity. I shook my head, and buried my face in my hands.

"Like I told you before, she's batshit. Just indulge her a little. That's what I do," Jasper muttered at vampire speed. Even though the words were harsh, I could hear the affection in them. I smiled into my hands. Jasper likes me.

"I wonder... I wonder if she has visions like Alice? I mean, Alice can't remember her human life, right? Maybe she was mentally unstable like Bella. That would explain a lot, actually," Edward said thoughtfully, still using vamp speed of course. Mustn't let the mentally unstable human hear.

_Visions! Bingo. B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O..._

Shut up and listen.

"Bella's not that bad," Jasper defended. I smiled again, I just couldn't help it.

"You really like her." Edward stated. _He doesn't have to sound so surprised!_

"Yeah. I do. She spices things up. She's a little hellcat, that's for sure," he chuckled, before becoming serious once again. "She loves me, Edward. Not romantic or anything, but like a brotherly love. Why me? Out of all the Cullen's she could have attached herself to, why me? I'm not good at this shit. Hell, I would've probably eaten her by now if she had a scent."

He sounds so unsure, so lost. Nothing like the confident Major that Angel described. And what the fuck does he mean, I have no scent? I'm scentless?

_I suppose that's why you didn't get the stink eye from Edward that first day in Biology._

"Yes, well, you still could. What if she had an accident or cut herself? What then, Jasper? You said it yourself, your control isn't great. Maybe you should just leave her alone. I'll talk to her, she'll understand."

What the fuck? Red hot rage boiled inside me. How dare he!

"You're really that jealous over this, over her? What the fuck, Edward? My control around her is just fine. I would never hurt her. Besides, even if it was a problem, which it's not, and I had to stay away from her for some reason, she would never talk to you. She dislikes you with a passion, Edward. So go spout your shit elsewhere,_ brother_," he sneered. _Go Jasper!_

"Bella," Edward pleads, their 'private' conversation concluded. I finally lifted my head and glared at him.

"Leave. Please, just leave. I can't do this shit with you here. I promised Jasper answers, not you, and I'll be damned if I tell you anything, you selfish, controlling, back-stabbing, manipulative piece of shit," I said softly, calmly even.

_Well hell, tell him what you really think, why don't ya._

He growled and scowled at me, but he did finally leave via my window. I sighed. What a clusterfuck this was turning out to be.

"He's gone. I can't feel his emotions anymore," Jasper informed me, walking away from the window and taking his seat in the rocking chair once more. He opened his mouth to say more, but the phone ringing cut him off. I sighed again. What now?

I ran downstairs and answered the phone. It was Charlie, asking me if I felt alright today. Shit, I was supposed to be at school, wasn't I?

"Sorry, Char- Dad. I didn't sleep well last night and I must have forgotten to set my alarm." It wasn't a lie; I did forget to set my alarm. I had never used the cat alarm, still using my previous clock. Which reminded me...how the hell did the damn cat alarm get set anyway?

"Well, I came to wake you up this morning, but you looked like you hadn't got much sleep, so I figured you could stay home this one time. I, uh, tried to figure out your alarm clock to turn it off. Guess I did something right, huh?" he laughed nervously. I smiled. Charlie was so thoughtful.

_Yeah, well now you know why you were meowed to wake this morning._

Hush, you. Sentimental moment happening here.

"You do everything right, Dad," I assured him. "Thanks, you know, for everything."

"Yeah, well, uh, you're welcome. Look, I have to go back to work. Want me to pick up pizza on the way home?" I could practically see his face turning red, even through the phone. I smiled and told him that pizza sounded perfect.

We hung up, and I was suddenly very anxious. I did not want to talk to Jasper about my past. I did promise, though. I walked over to the cabinet by the sink, and opened it. I pushed all the boxes of shit that was in there aside, and found the bottle of Jack Daniels that I knew was hidden there. I had accidentally found it last week, while looking for something to fix for dinner.

_Is this really a wise idea?_

Wow, don't tell me you're applying for the 'voice of reason' position. If I'm going to do this, I'm going to have help. JD here, looks up for the job.

_Don't say I didn't warn you._

I take full responsibility for my actions, thank you very much. Now sit down, shut up, and enjoy the ride.


	10. Chapter 10

You just walked away

simply betrayed my trust within you.

.

Just left me here,

left me blinded by my tears.

.

You just run away

from all the pain that I exposed.

.

Left me behind,

questioning everything I chose

to let you know.

.

**Jaspers POV**

**.**

"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw!" Bella sputtered out, coughing and gagging from downstairs. I ran to her at top speed, stopping dead in my tracks at the scene that greeted me. I couldn't help my chuckle. Bella was doubled over, still coughing, hand on her throat. Jack Daniels was everywhere.

"It burns!" she wailed, still clutching at her throat. It reminded me very much of a newly turned vampire. Hmm, Bella as a vampire...I shuddered, actually fucking shuddered. That shit was just too scary for words.

"First time meeting Jack?" I asked her, trying unsuccessfully to stifle my laughter.

"Fuuckk!" she uttered with real meaning. "Jack Daniels can take a flying liplock to my metaphorical fuck stick for all I care. Son of a fucking whore, that shit should come with a warning," she muttered, wiping the spewed alcohol off of her chin with the back of her hand.

"I'm pretty sure it comes with multiple warnings, darlin," I told her absently, still trying to process her earlier words. Damn, the girl had a naughty little mouth on her.

"Yeah, well, Jack can still fuck right off, warning or no," she muttered, glancing at the mess her kitchen had become. "Shit, now I have to clean this mess up. I smell like a whore getting ready for a long night." She cocked her head to the side slighty and snorted. Then she full on laughed. What the fuck?

"What's so funny?" I asked her.

"Don't look a whore's gift in the mouth," she uttered under her breath, still laughing. Then louder, "Nothing, Jasper, just conversing with the voices inside my head." Cue the deranged smile.

"Uh-huh. That's not exactly healthy, you know," I said slowly, trying to figure out if she was fucking with me or not. She sent me a wave of humor and started laughing again.

"I'm just fucking with you, Jasper," she informed me, wiping the tears caused by her laughter from her eyes. Thinking over everything she'd done, I wasn't so sure. But I let it go, like I have let so many other things before go when it comes to dealing with Bella. That was my strategy, picking my battles. It seemed to be working well so far, why defer from it now.

"I'm off to get a shower. Make yourself useful and clean this place up, would you? Thanks, Jasper!" She rose up on her tip-toes and placed a light kiss to my cheek and then she was gone. I snapped out of it when I heard the shower start up. I shook my head. How the hell do I get myself into these situations?

By the time Bella finished her shower, I had the entire kitchen cleaned up. I didn't do it because she told me to; I did it so she couldn't delay our talk any longer. That's what I told myself, anyway. She gave me her seal of approval and thanked me again, before taking my hand and leading me back to her bedroom. She resumed her previous seat on the bed, and hugged her pillow to her. I parked my ass back in the rocking chair and started the questioning.

"How did you know who I was?" I asked her softly. She shifted around a little and looked down.

"I have...visions? Not all the time, like Alice, but just...sometimes. It's really not like Alice's visions at all, but that's the only thing I can think of to compare it to. When I do have them, and it's very rare that I do, they aren't subjective to choices being made. They show me what will actually happen if I allow them to play out as they should, as life would have played out if I had not had the vision.

"It's not like a normal vision, Jasper. I don't know that I'm having one until after I come out of it. It's very...intense. I have all these memories of things that haven't happened yet. All these feelings for people that I've never actually met. Do you understand the ramifications, Jasper? Do you understand why it's difficult for me to speak about?" she finished quietly.

I took a second to think about it, actually think about everything she just said. What would it be like to forge relationships with people and then just 'wake up' one day and find that no one remembers you? You would care for or even love someone that had no idea you even existed.

"How far?" How far ahead did you see? How long did you have to develop emotions for others who don't even know you exist now?

"One year, one month, and twenty-four days," she whispered, eyes shining with tears.

"Over a year?" I breathed, stunned. Sweet mother of fuck. This is how she knew me. Knew us. The Cullen's. "Oh, Bella..."

"Yes, over a year. I knew you all...knew all about you because you told me. The visions don't happen often, in fact...I've only had the one. But it...was just so long...and then no one knew me. I felt like I'd been in Forks for well over a year, but no one else knew me. It...took some time to come to terms with it...I still haven't worked everything out yet. How do you talk to someone that you have months of memories with...when they don't even remember you at all? It's as if I never existed to them. But then, I really didn't, did I? Ironic, isn't it?" She was blabbing, muttering more to herself than to me at this point.

"Bella.." I murmured, unsure of what to say. Throw me in charge of an army of newborns, and I'll take control and know exactly what to say and do. But this one little human leaves me completely and utterly speechless. What do you say to someone who says she's known you for over a year, but you have no memories of her? I don't think Hallmark makes a card for this specific brand of fuckery.

"Ask your questions, Jasper, because I am not revisiting this shit again. That's all you want, right? Get your answers, and then you can leave? That's something all you Cullen's know how to do, after all," she muttered bitterly, wiping the tears from her eyes. I chose to ignore that last jibe. She was getting close to breaking down and I needed to get everything from her that I could before she did.

"How can you keep me from feeling your emotions?"

"I've been told that I'm a shield. That's how I keep you all out. I can control the strength of it; thin it out some to allow you in or thicken it up to deny the emotions you send me. Next question, Jasper." Her tears were flowing faster, and I knew I was running out of time.

"The bites all over your arms- What happened to you?" This was important. I needed to know, no matter how callous it seemed to continue questioning this innocent, broken girl that was sobbing quietly in front of me. Fucckkk.

"I was kidnapped by a vampire with a vendetta. She thought it was funny to inject venom into my system and then draw it back out before I changed. She enjoyed my screams. She laughed at my pain. She tortured me for ten straight days. She took everything from me."

She was sobbing harder now, struggling to push each word out. I knew that I would only get one more answer, if that. But looking at her in all her misery, I was hesitant to make her answer any more of my heartless questions. I had destroyed countless humans and vampires alike and I hated it, sure, but never once had I felt this much anguish over a choice. Please forgive me, Bella, but I have to know.

"How did you get away from her, Bella?"

She looked at me then, empty emotionless brown eyes met my own and I gasped aloud. I was gazing at a stranger, a completely different person. This dead-eyed little girl was not the strong, brave, in-your-face hellcat that I had come to know and love. In that second, I knew what her answer would be. She had never escaped from her past. I could tell that she was reliving it at this very moment, retreating back to the place inside herself that she had once hid to survive. And I hated myself for taking her back to that place. Her barely audible through her sobs answer came as no surprise to me.

"I didn't."

And I believed her. For the first time in my life, I acted like a pussy. I took the cowardly way out and ran, her racking sobs trailing in my wake, yet still haunting me. I ran from Bella's house and I didn't look back. If only I had known the consequences of my actions that day, I would never have left her.


	11. Chapter 11

**Bella POV**

**.**

_I was slowly drawn to consciousness by the pain. My arm felt like it was on fire. Was I indeed dead? Was I finally paying for my many sins in Hell? What happened to me? The pain was getting worse, quickly turning into gut-wrenching, all-consuming agony. I couldn't think, couldn't move. Scream after scream was torn from my throat. But even though my screams filled the air, I could still hear her laughter._

_Flashes of memory swam through my head; Charlie torn to pieces, a phone conversation with Victoria, driving to Seattle to save my Mom, something jumping on the hood of my truck. No, that's not right. Not something; someone. Victoria._

_Another brief bit of memory joined the rest; my truck swerving, losing control, crashing into a guardrail and tumbling off of a bridge. The last thing I remembered was the water coming closer and closer. I must have blacked out._

_Another ear piercing scream tore its way out of my throat. My arm was boiling! What was happening to me? Was she burning me alive?_

_"Fuucckkkk! Kill me! Please, just kill me!" I begged, ready for the pain to stop. Anything had to be better than this, even death. Another wave of agony washed over me, flowing through more of my body now. It hurt. Sweet Heavens, how it hurt._

_"P-please...kill me," I pleaded, willing to do anything to end this torment. Little did I know that my torture had just begun. I felt a cold hand grab my blazing arm and I screamed out in anguish. It fucking hurt so much! My skull felt like it was being crushed from the weight of the pain. Somebody make it stop!_

_Another wave of pure agony washed over me and reality seemed to fracture, leaving me floating amongst the pieces. Thoughts and screams swirled around me, but all I could feel, all that mattered, was the inferno that was slowly consuming my entire left side._

_And then the sea of flames started to retreat, slowly traveling back down through my body and to the area of my arm where the fire first started. Once the pain had receded enough, coherent thought started to return to me, and I realized what was causing my torment. Venom. The bitch had bitten me. I felt another pull on my arm and realized that she was sucking the venom back out. It was all too much for my human mind to take. Everything began to fade, darkness overtaking my vision. I was on the verge of passing out again. Good, I thought as I welcomed the darkness._

_But I never got to enjoy the reprieve that passing out would have granted me, because at that moment Victoria snapped my leg in the same exact spot that James once had. I was trembling, the shock of the pain ripping the black haze from my mind and submerging me in misery once more._

_"Stay with me, Bella. Wouldn't want to miss the show, now would you?" Victoria purred, kicking a lump a few feet away from me. I took notice of my surroundings then, my pain level finally being low enough to allow me some rational thought. Don't get me wrong, it still freaking hurt, but it was nothing compared to the venom that had just been coursing through my veins._

_I was in a small rectangular room, probably a basement judging by the lack of windows. There was an awful stench coming from somewhere off in the corner. I turned my head that way and was horrified by the number of broken bodies that were stacked on top of each other, each corpse pale and lifeless. Dried blood spattered the walls, floor, and even the ceiling, some spots brighter than others due to the varying degree of freshness involved._

_Displaced body parts littered the floor, fingers and toes strewn here and there like some sinister game of 'pin the extremity on the human' was being played. Hell, I wouldn't put it past the sick bitch at this point. There was even a penis or three scattered throughout the grisly disorder._

_Victoria grabbed my face and I suddenly found myself staring into her crimson eyes. A slow malevolent smile spread across her features, making her truly look like the sadistic vampire that she was._

_"Bella, Bella, Bella," she chided mockingly. "What am I going to do with you? I have a special surprise just for you, my pet. I think you'll just love it. In fact, I'm sure of it," she said with a menacing laugh. Her face took on a thoughtful expression, before she started speaking again._

_"It's more of an anniversary present to myself, actually. Did you know that in nine days it will be the one year anniversary of our first meeting? The one year anniversary of the day that was the beginning of the end for my James. I'm planning on having a special dinner that night." She laughed, a full throaty laugh. "Don't worry dear, your invited. In fact, you could even say that I wouldn't be able to start without you."_

_She grabbed my pinky finger and bent it backwards until there was a sickening pop as the bone separated. I let out an involuntary whimper as the pain surged through me. She wasn't satisfied with my reaction, so she gave a quick flick of her hand and shattered my wrist. A bloodcurdling shriek bubbled out of me, and Victoria smiled, happy once again._

_She ran her fingernails across my lips, cutting them open. I howled with pain, and that just made it hurt even worse. I could feel the blood tricking down my chin and onto my chest. Victoria's eyes darkened slightly, but that was the only outward sign she gave that she was even affected by my blood. But, then again, she did overindulge to prepare herself for this, judging by the number of bodies stacked in the corner. She finally let go of me and walked over to the lump that she had kicked earlier._

_I hardly paid any attention, still trying to acclimate to my current level of pain. My hand and wrist were throbbing, and my lips hurt real bad. My head was throbbing in time with my hand and I was becoming more than a little lightheaded from the smell of my own blood. I kept praying to black out, for the darkness to take me, but it never came. Instead I watched as Victoria kicked the lump again, but this time the lump moved and moaned a bit. It almost sounded familiar..._

_"Don't be lazy Renee, get up and say 'Hello' to your daughter," Victoria hissed, pulling the blanket off of my mother. Oh no. Not my mom. I whimpered and tried to pull myself across the floor towards her. Sweet hells, it fucking hurt._

_"So, Bella, do you like your surprise? It's a lovely little family reunion, isn't it? And so convenient, too. I needed a snack to hold me over during the coming week, and she was right there, providing interesting little tidbits about your childhood. You didn't really think that I would leave her alive now did you? My James is lost to me for all eternity because of you, you worthless good-for-nothing sack of blood! Did you really think that I would spare you any pain by letting your mother live?"_

_She reached down and pulled my mother up by her hair and then slapped her across the face. Renee finally came to, throwing her arms across her face in a futile attempt to protect herself._

_"Mom," I whispered, stretching my good arm out to try and touch her. Victoria had lied. The bitch lied to me and now she had my mom! Oh no, please no. Please let this all be some horrible nightmare. But it wasn't and I knew it as I watched Victoria grab my mother's hand. She squeezed and I screamed as I watched her crush every single bone in Renee's hand in one go._

_My mother's shrieks drowned out my own as Victoria repeated the process on her other hand. I lay on the floor helpless as I watched Victoria repeatedly torture my mom. When she reached down and snapped her leg, she wasn't careful enough with her strength and she ended up pushing the bone all the way out through the skin. Blood spurted everywhere, brilliant red gushes ran down Renee's leg and pooled on the floor. Victoria couldn't take the bloodlust any longer, and I watched in horror as she tipped my mother's neck to the side and bit into her throat._

_"I'm so sorry Mom," I sobbed out, arm still outstretched toward her. "So...fucking...sorry." My words were barely audible through the force of my sobs. I again prayed for death, only to be denied once more. I looked up once again to see my mom watching me. Our eyes locked and I watched as the life slowly drained out of them._

_"I love you, baby girl," she choked, blood coming out along with her words. And then she was gone. Forever lost to me. Victoria picked up her lifeless body and callously chunked her onto the pile of her previous meals. I was in shock, my mind still trying to protect me from all that had just happened. It was all my fault. Both of my parents were dead, and it was all because of me. I didn't have long to dwell on my guilt, because Victoria decided that my reprieve from physical pain was over._

_"Well that was fun," she laughed, as she walked over to me and kicked me in the stomach. I gagged and choked up blood, spitting it all over her feet. I was broken, completely and utterly broken. The only thing I had to look forward to was my own death. Just nine more days, I thought as the blackness finally pulled me under. That was the first night that I was visited by my Angel._

**~~~~~.~~~~~**

I was pulled from my memories to find myself still on my bed, curled up in a ball, holding on to my pillow for dear life. I felt cold inside, and I was trembling so hard that my teeth were chattering together. My body was drenched in a cold sweat, my face soaked with tears. Even the voices in my head were quiet as I silently got up and walked towards the shower.


	12. Chapter 12

**Bella POV**

**.**

I was pulled from my memories to find myself still on my bed, curled up in a ball, holding on to my pillow for dear life. I felt cold inside, and I was trembling so hard that my teeth were chattering together. My body was drenched in a cold sweat, my face soaked with tears. Even the voices in my head were quiet as I silently got up and walked towards the shower.

I turned only the hot water on, shed my clothes, and stepped in. The scorching water helped to bring me back to myself. Fucking hell, I hated the flashbacks. I grabbed the shampoo and began lathering up my hair. I lasted a whole two minutes before I allowed my mind to slip to Jasper.

He left. He fucking left me here all alone, just like he did before. Just like they all did. At least we didn't know each other well the last time he left. This time, though...it hurt. It really fucking hurt. I never should have involved myself with any of them again. I knew better, I honestly knew better, but I did it anyway. I wanted to give Jasper another chance; get to know him better and let him get to know me better in turn. He was my mate's sire, after all.

**~~~.~~~**

_It was the eighth day of my torment, and I had just blacked out from the pain of another bite. I was sprawled out on the huge puke green colored sofa that my mind had conjured up in what I now referred to as my 'dreamscape'. I'm not sure if it was my minds way of protecting itself from going crazy, or if I was already there and this was the result, but every single time that I passed out, I ended up in the same 'dream', in the same room, on the same damn ugly green sofa. I sighed. At least the atrocious piece of furniture was comfortable._

_"Kitten?" I heard my angel's voice call. I smiled. Though he reassured me daily that he was, in fact, real, I couldn't help but question him. After all, if he was just a figment of my imagination, wouldn't I have imaged him to think he was real? That he was imaginary or a by-product of my crazy, was a much easier to swallow answer than the shit that he tried to feed me. But I indulged him, because why not? It was all in my head, after all._

_"Angel," I sighed as I felt him lift my feet and sit down on the couch beside me. He placed my feet back down on his lap and started gently rubbing them. I peeled one eye open to gaze at him, and then opened the other one as well because, damn, he was a sight. From his deliciously defined muscles to his beautifully rugged face, he was perfect because of his imperfections. _

_The bridge of his nose was slightly crooked, as if it had been broken one too many times. It was highly unusual because the venom didn't fix it when he changed. He had bite marks scattered across his body, most residing on his neck and torso, though he did have one solitary bite mark on his face. It was on his forehead, right above his left eye. _

_I could tell he was bothered by it, because he always made sure his hair fell over it and covered it up. I glanced down at my own arms, wincing slightly at the new bunch of scars that had only today joined the rest. _

_I sat up slowly, and gently pushed his soft sandy brown hair back from his face. He ducked his head, shy, and I giggled because it was such a disconcerting image. This handsome strong vampire was shy around me. Wonders would never cease. He lifted his head and finally looked at me, crimson eyes meeting my own brown ones. I smiled at him and gave him a tentative kiss, just a soft brush of my lips against his. The smile that he gave me afterwards was simply brilliant, breathtaking even. I snuggled up against him and sighed my contentment. Everything in the real world had gone to shit, so I figured I damn well better enjoy any peace that I could find while I was still able to._

_"Tell me again how you met Jasper," I said, shifting slightly as he traced the bite marks now trailing down both of my arms. He was scowling at each one as if they had committed some awful injustice towards him. In his mind, I suppose they had. He felt guilty for everything that had happened, everything that was still happening. But it wasn't his fault and I knew that. What more could he have given when he'd already sacrificed his life?_

_"Stop it," I said softly, using my fingers to 'turn his frown upside down'. He gave me a small smile for my efforts. "It's not your fault. Besides, it has to happen, right? I have to die to join you. If you're waiting on the other side, death won't be so bad. We can go haunt Jasper together," I teased. "It'll be payback for him trying to take a bite out of me."_

_"I don't want you to die," he murmured sadly. "I don't want you to have to go through this. Any of this. I wish I could save you from it. Do you realize how hard it is to have to watch her do those things to you? I love you, Bella. I just wish I could do more. We should work on your shield tonight. Every bit of venom that enters your veins is strengthening it. Maybe you could manifest it physically soon if we practiced more. Push Victoria away from you."_

_I didn't say the obvious; that even if I could it would do no good. I would only end up dying slower, eventually starving to death. Death was truly the only option, and I knew that and accepted it. Besides, if Peter was real and not just my imaginary vampire, he would be waiting for me after I took that last breath and surrendered to the eternal rest._

_"No practice tonight, please. Just hold me," I begged. He kissed the tip of my nose and wrapped his arms around me tightly. He held me for a while and then told me a story of bites and bitches, armies and newborns, and a savior found in an unexpected place. He told me of the better life that he and his sister Charlotte had discovered, and how they eventually went back and saved their savior. They even took his last name, Whitlock, as their own in tribute to him. I smiled and enjoyed every second of it, knowing that my harsh reality would begin anew as soon as I awoke._

**~~~.~~~**

I shook my head, trying to shake the memories away. I missed him so much, my Angel, so fucking much. My Peter Whitlock. My mind slowly returned to the reason that I was having flashbacks tonight. Jasper Cullen. I was dealing with the consequences of trusting a Cullen again. And that's what Jasper was tonight, a Cullen. He doesn't deserve the last name Whitlock right now. My emotions were so fucked up, going from one extreme to another. I couldn't help but be angry with Jasper, but even more than that, I was hurt. So fucking hurt that he would betray me like that. He just left me here all alone when he knew that I was breaking down. He would have known that I was emotionally unstable, even more so than my normal. He would have been able to sense that I was reliving those memories, retreating to that place inside myself.

But, still, he left, leaving me here by myself to deal with the memories that his questions had conjured up. Stupid fucking bastard. No better than any of the others. Never again would I open myself to any of them. Never again.

Quite a bit of time had passed and I vaguely registered that my water had gone cold. I dried off and got dressed in a daze, my mind still trying to recover from the images it had been subjected to. I went downstairs and glanced at the clock. Charlie still wasn't home. It wasn't like him to be this late without calling. Thinking about it, he shouldn't have been late at all. He wasn't the first time around and nothing had changed...except the pizza. Charlie didn't pick up pizza for us last time.

I grabbed the phone and quickly dialed the pizza place's number. It rang quite a few times before it was answered by what sounded like an out of breath teenager.

"Yes, I was wondering if Charlie Swan has been in yet? He was supposed to pick up pizza, but he hasn't made it home yet so I was just wondering if you guys were extra busy or something." Gah, I sounded like such an idiot.

"C-chief S-swan?" the girl stuttered. At least she knows who I'm talking about.

"Yes, Chief Swan. Has he already picked up the pizza?" Silence fell and I seriously started to wonder if I'd gotten a mentally deficient pizza person. Maybe I should hang up and try my call again.

"Oh God, it all happened so fast!" she cried, and then lapsed into silence again. I was soo not in the mood to deal with this shit.

"What? What happened so fast? If you make me wait one more fucking second, I am going to come through this phone and motherfucking cut you, bitch, so I suggest you answer me right the fuck now!"

"T-there was a drunk driver and he hit the cop car when it pulled out of the parking lot. I-it was awful and t-there was so much b-blood...it k-killed him," she wailed, breaking down in sobs. I absently hung the phone up, only one thought flowing through my head. Charlie was dead, and it was once again my fault.

.


	13. Chapter 13

**Bella POV**

**.**

What had I done? If I hadn't stayed up all night talking to Jasper and Edward, then I would have gotten up this morning and went to school like before. I would have come home and cooked fish, just like before. But, no, I had to change things by staying home and letting Charlie go get pizza.

Such a simple thing really, changing dinner, but the consequences of that choice would haunt me for eternity. I wasn't the only one to blame, though. No, if it wasn't for those damn Cullen's invading my room, nothing would have changed.

In the far depths of my mind, my rational side knew that no one was really to blame except the drunk driver. It wasn't my fault, nor were the Cullen's at fault. Well, they weren't at fault for this, anyway. I couldn't have possibly known what would happen, but if by some miracle I had found out beforehand, you can bet your ass that I would definitely have changed it. I would never have let him go to that fucking pizza place.

I was, however, far from rational at the moment. My grief and guilt was all consuming. I would never see my Dad again. Never again hear him laugh, or give me hell about my love for my truck. He would never know just how much I loved and appreciated him. My daddy was gone.

My emotions were overloading me. I knew I was getting close to having another panic attack, and the last thing I needed was to experience another flashback. I had to get my emotions under control, numb them somehow. I needed some high powered medication, or...an empath. I wondered if he was close enough to hear me if I yelled for him. Maybe he didn't totally abandon me. Maybe he just went out into the woods to collect himself or something.

_Yeah, and cats can fly. You are in some serious denial. Jasper is Gone with a capital G. He got the answers he wanted, and he tucked tail and ran. You think he gives two shits if you are hurting? Me thinks not._

Do you think I don't know that? Everyone is gone and it fucking hurts, so excuse me if I want to wallow in denial for one motherfucking second. Sue me, bitch!

_Technically, you just called yourself a bitch. Just sayin..._

"Jasper!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I could feel the memories closing in on me, brief flashes of my torture already playing behind my eyes. No. Please no. Not right now. I took a deep breath and called out to him again, only to be met with the same silence as before. Jasper was gone.

_I hate to be a bitch and say I told you so, but..._

I harshly scrubbed my hands over my eyes, trying to scrub away the memories that were taunting me. Fuck, I hated this. Why now? I had just lost my father; I wanted to grieve in peace. But I wasn't even allowed that, it seemed. The images were growing stronger, promising me pain and misery. I fervently wished that I could just go to sleep and hide away from this harsh reality for a time.

_Well we both know that you can't just go to sleep on a whim. However, you could possibly make yourself pass out for a time..._

Could I? How would I do that? And then it came to me, the one thing that always made me pass out before. The smell of blood. I ran to the silverware drawer, and grabbed the sharpest kitchen knife that I could find. I carefully pressed it to my fingertip and applied pressure. I smiled as a drop of crimson appeared, but my smile quickly faded when nothing happened. Not even a slight feeling of light headedness. Absolutely nothing. I had been subjected to so much blood when I was with Victoria, that it didn't even faze me anymore. Just another thing that the bitch took from me.

I threw the knife into the sink, and sunk to the floor. My breathing was ragged, and I could literally feel myself slipping from reality. I was going back to the torture room. I could smell the decomposing corpses already.

"No! No! No!" I screamed out loud, trying to anchor myself to this world, this reality. I didn't know if I could live through another flashback right now. I didn't know if I'd be able to ever pull myself back out of it.

_Look! Stop your sniveling for a second and look._

I opened my eyes and did as I was told. I automatically clutched at my throat when my eyes fell on the bottle of JD that Jasper had neglected to put up. Maybe, just maybe, this could work. I opened the bottle and took a quick swig. Ugh. I shuddered, forcing myself to swallow the vile shit. How could anyone actually enjoy this? I took another, and was surprised when it didn't burn as bad as the last. I could do this. Bottoms up!

I did it. I finished the whole damn bottle. I coughed and sputtered, and spouted a few profanities, but, dammit, I did it.

_We did it. We did it. We did it. Yea! Lo hicimos. We did it. Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-do. We found the bottle and we swallowed it down. Yeah, we did it. We did it. We did it. Hooray! Finished off the Jack, now it's time to play. Yeah, we did it. We did i-_

Shut the fuck up! And, really, Dora? What the fuck?

_Remember when Charlie sent you Dora socks for your 10th birthday? You were so embarrassed when you opened it at your party in front of all your classmates._

Charlie is so clueless when it comes to me. Was so clueless. He's gone. I can't believe my Dad is gone. I would wear Dora socks every single day for the rest of my life if he would just come back to me. Hell, I would tattoo Dora on my ass if I could see him walk through that door again.

_Bottoms up!_

"Bella? What the hell are you doing?" I heard my father's voice ask. I looked up through blurry eyes to see my Dad standing over me.

"Daddy!" I cried, launching myself at him. "I thought you were dead. The pizza bitch told me you were dead," I sobbed, wrapping my arms around him tightly. Was I so drunk that I was imagining things? If so, I never wanted to sober up.

"What? Oh God, Bella, no. I was in an accident, yes, but it was the drunk driver that was killed. Shh, it's okay. I'm right here," he assured me, holding me as I sobbed. I knew this was huge for Charlie, since any type of emotion squicked him out. After a few minutes, my sobbing eased, but my stomach was rolling.

"I'm gonna puke," I choked out, trying to run towards the bathroom. I only made it a few wobbly steps before I was doubled over, coating the kitchen floor with Jack for the second time that night. When I was done, Charlie silently handed me a wet washcloth. I haphazardly wiped my mouth, and noticed that Charlie was holding the empty Jack bottle.

"What did you do, Bella? Tell me you didn't drink this whole bottle!" he said loudly. The noise made my head pound, which made my stomach roil, which made me double over and heave onto the floor once more. After what felt like hours later, I straightened and shakily attempted to wipe my mouth again. I didn't feel so good.

"Bella, look at me," Charlie ordered, lightly gripping my face and making me meet his eyes.

"Your dead," I slurred. "How are you here when you're dead? Am I dead too? Did the vampires finally kill me? Fucking bloodsuckers."

"Shit, Bella. I'm taking you to the hospital. Come on, kid," he said. Aw, he was worried.

"N-no hospital. I don't want to be Forks gossip topic cause of it," I told him seriously. "Plus, a vampire works there and I don't like him. He sucks!" I giggled.

"Christ, Bella. I'll take you to Port Angeles. Please, just come on," he coaxed, dragging me by the arm towards the door. He was crying. He shouldn't be crying.

"Don't cry, Daddy. I'm not gonna die. I'm gonna live for all eternity as a vampire. But don't worry, I won't suck your blood," I giggled. "I'll be tame, like a kitten. I'll even purr. I'll be a domse- domests- domesticated vampire."

"Shit, your freezing. Stay with me, baby girl. Please stay with me," Charlie begged as he sat me in the front of his cruiser. Charlie cussed. I giggled. Oh, look at the pretty lights. I don't feel so good. Fucking Jack! And then everything went black.


	14. Chapter 14

**Bella POV**

**.**

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

The fuck?

Beep.

Beep.

_Hey, it's better than 'meow'._

Beep.

Beep.

No, it's really not.

Beep.

Beep.

_Okay, I retract my previous statement. Kill the beep!_

I opened my eyes cautiously, and glanced around. Great. Just fucking great. I was in the hospital. Again. Damn, I hated hospitals. Hospitals are big buildings, full of sick people, with stupid fucking machines that have flashy lights on them and that 'ping' and 'beep' annoyingly all day long.

_As are casinos...the difference being that NOBODY leaves a hospital with more money than they came in with._

True...unless they screwed the doctors over on a few games of 3 Card Monty, but...I suck at cards.

_Or unless you let Michael Jackson examine you._

What? Michael Jackson isn't even a doctor.

_Okkayy. Note to self: Michael Jackson is not a doctor. Do NOT let him examine you...for free!_

You naughty slut...you're way too old for him...and the wrong sex.

_True that. Did you know that the English word "hospital" comes from the French word hospitale, which means "we surrender"? Scary, isn't it?_

Very. Why am I here anyway? I remember...shit, Charlie. Charlie is dead and Jack makes me hallucinate.

_If Charlie was a hallucination, then how the fuck did you get to the hospital, dumbass? Huh? Answer me that one._

Jasper?

_When are you going to get it through your head; Jasper left you. He didn't give a rat's ass about you and he's gone. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it! *snickers* Oh wait, they cut your big girl panties off when you checked in, didn't they?_

I have mentioned that I hate hospitals. Have I ever told you that you are a hard bitch?

_It's called tough love, sugar. Get used to me, I'm here to stay._

Just until they find some sort of medication to get rid of you.

_What?_

Just kidding bitch. I like you. You're funny.

_I strive to please._

The hospital door opened and a nurse clad in pink scrubs walked in. She was blonde, skinny, had fake tits, a spray on tan, and was wearing bright red lipstick. This should be fun.

"You're awake! That's great! It will make this so much easier. Can you leave to the side a little bit for me?" If she were any perkier, she'd turn into one of her fake tits.

_That made no sense. Hey, what does she have in her hand? Holy shit, batman, that needle is longer than Jonah Falcon's wong!_

Who the fuck is Jonah Falcon?

_World Record Holder. Look it up. 13.5 and damn, are all I have to say about it._

Okkayy. Is she fixin to do what I think she's doin?

_Yep. Incoming!_

"Fuck. That hurt," I mumbled, rubbing at the now sore spot on my ass.

"It's okay, sweetie. It'll just sting for a second. It's just a little shot to help you feel better. You got lucky. Alcohol poisoning can kill, you know," Nurse Barbie informed me.

_So can implants, bitch, but you don't hear me throwing that shit in your face._

Do I even want to know?

_1000 Ways To Die. Need I say more?_

Oh yeah. I remember now. That woman bought cheap implants and they literally exploded on the airplane. That was some sick shit.

_Indeed._

"I'll let the doctor know you're awake. Your father just ran down to the cafeteria, like, 5 minutes or so ago."

_Like, okay._

"Thanks," I muttered, stifling a giggle as she walked out the door.

_5...4...3..2..1_

Sweet mother of Jack, Charlie is alive. My dad's alive! It wasn't all a hallucination. He really is alive!

_Wait for it..._

Fuck me sideways and call me skippy, it wasn't a hallucination! It was real. I told Charlie about vampires! Son of a mother-loving naked sparkling vampire dong!

_I wanna take a ride on your disco stick...Something tells me that Gaga has got connections._

Hush, you. Freaking out here. What am I going to say? Will he believe that it was just drunk rambling? I don't think I said the name 'Cullen'. Did I? Did I-

_Sheesh, calm down. Forget about it._

Don't Kanye me, or I'll Chris Brown you, and Tiger Woods your mother! And what do you mean 'forget about it'?

_Don't...interrupt you, or you'll...beat me, and...fuck my mother? We share a mother so that's just sick, bitch. And, yes, just forget about it. Literally. You wouldn't remember any of it at all if your shield wouldn't have protected your memories. Alcohol Poisoning fucks with memories sometimes._

If you say so. Where the fuck am I?

_I am pretty damn sure that we established that, 15 minutes ago. You are in a hospital._

I know that, I just don't recognize it. We aren't in Forks, thank fuck. So where are we? Seattle, maybe? That's pretty far away, though. Maybe Port Angeles? There's a hospital there isn't there?

"Bella?" I had been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't even registered my father walking into the room.

"Daddy?" I whispered, eyes filling with tears. I felt about four years old again, and all I wanted was for my daddy to hold me and tell me that everything was alright. It was so much easier then, I thought with a sigh.

"Oh Bella, I was so worried," he said, voice gruff. He walked up beside me and lightly took my hand. "Don't you ever do that shit to me again. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, Dad," I answered, smiling through the tears. "Are you real? Not just some drug induced fantasy?"

_Just checking? Cuz we've sort of already established this._

"I'm here, Bells. I'm real," he promised, leaning down to give me an awkward hug. It's hard to hug when your IVs restrict your arm movement.

"I'm so sorry, Ch- Dad. You were late and I called the pizza place. A girl answered and told me that you'd been in a wreck. Then she told me that there was blood everywhere and that you d-died. I was hurting so bad, and I just wanted it to stop. I found that bottle and thought that maybe it would help. I'm so sorry. Thank you for taking care of me," I finished in a whisper.

"Aw, Bella, you're welcome. Just don't scare me like that again, okay," he muttered, face flushed with embarrassment. Charlie didn't like expressing his emotions.

"Deal. I will divorce Jack and get a restraining order against him. No more drinking. That was a one timer, I swear. So...where are we?"

"I brought you to the Olympic Memorial Hospital in Port Angeles. You, uh, didn't want to go to the hospital in Forks," he mumbled, running his fingers through his hair nervously.

"Really? Why? I mean, I can't really remember anything after finding the bottle," I said, ducking my head sheepishly. Charlie relaxed at that, the tension flowing out of him nearly visible.

"You, um, said you didn't want people in Forks to gossip about you. I agreed, so I brought you here. I even checked you in as Isabella Marie Dwyer," he told me, unsuccessfully fighting back a proud smile.

"Thanks Dad," I laughed. "What about school and your work? You'll have to miss work tomorrow, won't you?" He shifted his eyes from mine, and stared at the flower arrangement that I just noticed was on the bedside stand.

"Um, what day do you think it is Bells?" he asked, straining to try and keep his voice light. Uh-oh.

"Uh, it's still Wednesday night isn't it?" I asked, glancing at the clock to see that it was 5:56 a.m. "Well, early Thursday morning, anyway."

"It's Friday morning, Bella. You've been out cold for over 24 hours. The doctor said that you, uh, needed to rest and all. So, other than not remembering Wednesday night, everything's normal, right? I mean, there aren't any other holes in your memory?" he asked, still not meeting my eyes.

"No," I told him, stunned. "No, no holes in my memory. Friday, huh?" I had slept for over a full day. No more liquid poison for me, ever. Fuckk!

"Yeah. I took the rest of the week off because of the wreck, and I called the school and told them that you were sick and wouldn't be in. That's not going to explain your face, though."

"My face?" I repeated like I was a parrot. It seemed to be all I could handle at the moment. I slowly lifted my hands to my face and felt around. My face was sore and swollen, but not really hurting. Surely that meant it wasn't too bad.

"You, uh, tried to eat my dash," Charlie snickered. "The wreck totaled my cruiser, so I was driving the old Crown Vic that we'd replaced a few years back. I put you in there, and shut the door, but by the time I made it around to the driver's side, you'd passed out and face-planted into the dash. You busted your nose pretty bad. There was blood everywhere, and I was sure you had broken it, but the doctor said that you didn't. You do have two big ol' shiners, though, and quite a bit of swelling."

"It doesn't hurt," I told him stupidly, as if it wasn't that bad because it didn't hurt. My head was starting to spin.

"The nurse just gave you a shot of morphine, Bells. I really doubt that much of anything hurts right now," he chuckled. That explained a lot, I thought as I lost the battle with my heavy eyes, and fell into dreamland.

~~~~~.~~~~~

The next day found me dressed in a pair of bright pink yoga pants, and a black shirt with bright pink glittery cursive writing across the tatas that informed everyone that I was a "Dancing Queen".

_Can't forget the best part...*snickers*...the cat socks._

Yes, well, I was hoping that I could. Charlie had gone to Wal-Mart to buy me some clothes. Mustn't flash the nice people, after all. When he returned from his trip and walked back into my room, he was grinning from ear to ear. He stuck his hand in the plastic bag, rummaged around a bit, and then produced a pair of pink socks with a white 'pressable' cat at the top of them that meowed when you molested it hard enough. Nobody ever accused Charlie of having any fashion sense.

_Press it again, press it again! Meow, meow, meow, meow..._

NO! Seriously, what is your obsession with pussy these days? It's very scary. You're not switching teams on me are you, because I don't know how that would work out. Please, just shut up. The meowing reminds me of the cat clock, which reminds me of Jasper banging it, which reminds me of Jasper, which reminds me of how hurt and fucking pissed I am at him. Mostly hurt though. Gah, I am such a lil bitch, aren't I?

_Yes. Yes, you are. At least Charlie forgave you for the Jack thing. Don't worry, be happy man. Hmmm... _

If you start humming the song to that, I'll cut you bitch. If you sing it, it will be stuck in my head and I'll start singing it. Then Charlie will hear me, and when we get home, he will press the damn singing fish that's in the hall and he'll realize that I de-batteried that trout the first day that I arrived. Fish and singing do not mix.

_Note to self: Don't listen to singing fish. Got it._

You are such a dork. Now shut up and leave me alone so I can finish getting ready.

_The best part of waking up, is-_

I don't want Folgers in my cup, I want silence in my head, so hush, you. I've been poked and prodded and I'm finally getting discharged today and I feel like hammered shit, so be nice to me. You have to, it's a rule.

_Whatev._

"Bella? You ready to go?" Charlie asked, glancing around the room once more to make sure we had everything.

"Yep," I answered with a smile. My dad was alive!

We made it out to the old cruiser, and I laughed when I saw the dash. It was sparkling clean, which was at odds with the rest of the dirty interior. I sobered some when I saw that there were still blood spots on the floor carpet that Charlie hadn't been able to get out.

"Yeah, I, uh, tried to clean it," Charlie laughed. "I didn't realize how bad it would make the rest of the interior look if I just cleaned the dash."

We buckled up, and were soon pulling out of the hospital. I sighed loudly. I wasn't ready to go back to Forks just yet. Too bad we couldn't just stay here and have a mini-vacation. Then again, why couldn't we? Charlie didn't go back to work until Monday. Plus I had the money that I'd saved for a car when I was with Renee. Charlie had already heard from Tyler's parents' insurance company and they had agreed to pay whatever it took to fix my truck.

Time, check. Money, check. Now all I had to do was convince Charlie.

~~~~.~~~~

It hadn't taken much to convince Charlie that we both needed a break. It was a great weekend. After we left the hospital, we ran to Wal-Mart and bought a few supplies, and then went and checked into a nearby hotel.

After all our things were squared away, we spent the day visiting the Marine Life Center and doing some light shopping. I picked up some souvenirs for Renee and then about freaked out when I thought of her finding out about my recent hospital trip. I told Charlie and after a few minutes of barely there protest, he promised not to say anything to her. This would be just between us.

Sunday morning we got up early and took a ferry ride to Victoria, B.C. I had never been there before, and Charlie hadn't been in years, so we decided to take a tour of the place. Yeah, the only tour that was available was the Victoria Carriage Tour which, of course, included a horse, carriage, and a man in a top hat. We were rudely informed that it was normally reservation only, but someone had canceled last minute so we could purchase a tour if we liked.

I almost told the haughty little man just where he could shove it, but I could see Charlie eyeing the horse appreciatively. I hadn't known that Charlie even liked horses and I was happy to learn something new about my Dad. So I found myself dishing out the $170 for the 'Royal' tour. I have to admit that other than the stinky horse shit and long stares at my bruised face from nosy ass people, it was fun.

The tour was one hour long and started out at the Empress Hotel, which was a beautiful, huge castle-like building that overlooked the harbor, and continued on through Beacon Hill Park, which consisted mostly of flowers and duck ponds. It then went through some historic neighborhoods, before finishing back at the harbor next to a wax museum. I simply couldn't resist.

The wax museum was freaky and had over 300 different wax 'people' in it. I kept expecting one of them to jump out at me and cut my head off, but it never happened. Too many horror movies featuring wax museums, I suppose. Once I had established that I was relatively safe from horror movie monsters, the thrill was gone and it was quite boring.

After lunch, we went to the Victoria Butterfly Garden. It was beautiful and really quite awesome, featuring not only butterflies, but also a variety of tropical birds and fish. It was peaceful, and did wonders in helping me relax from the stress that had been weighing me down.

We rode the ferry back, and Charlie insisted that we have dinner at La Bella Italia. I bit back my protests and indulged him, although I did not order the mushroom ravioli. After we left there, we started back towards Forks. I was happy that we had gotten to spend the time together. Charlie was a lot more relaxed, and I knew I sure as shit was.

However, every mile closer to home that we got added tension to me. How would I deal with Jasper and the Cullen's? Did I even want to? They certainly wanted nothing to do with me unless it suited their purposes. Why should I not treat them the same?

_You should abjure them. You know, like Alcide did to Debbie: "I see you no_

_longer. I hunt with you no longer. I share flesh with you no longer." _

Yes, I should, huh? Although I never hunted with them, and definitely never shared flesh with them. But, yes, I agree. I should abjure them. I guess recreational reading does pay off.

_I do love me some Sookie._

_~~~.~~~_

As we slowly pulled into the school parking lot, I sighed, wishing that I could put this off a little while longer.

"It will be alright," Angela assured me with a small smile. She had left a few messages on the answering machine while I was gone, and I had called her back last night after I got home. She'd told me that she had collected my homework for me, and then offered to pick me up for school the next morning.

I ended up breaking down and telling her about thinking Charlie was dead and the Jack incident. I told her all about breaking my face, getting AP, and then about the wonderful weekend that I had spent with my dad. I knew that I could trust her, and it was truly a bonding experience for us.

"Everyone's going to stare," I whined. My face looked awful, even worse than before. It was finally starting to heal, I supposed, but right now I looked like the poster child for abuse.

"Just tell them you fell," Angela suggested, smiling shyly. I knew my secret was safe with her.

"I will. Thank fuck that Charlie didn't take me to Forks hospital," I muttered, opening the car door. I heard Angela quietly agree. I could feel my shield shimmering around us, I had covered Angela in it earlier, and I silently wondered if I could keep it up all day. I guess we'd see.

I stepped out and shut the door, wincing when I heard everyone within visual range gasp. Great. Somebody shoot me now. I glanced up and saw Jasper running towards me, barely pulling off the human speed thing. I pushed down the wave of hurt and betrayal that threatened to swallow me, and locked my shield down tight.

"Bella, what the hell happened to your face?" he demanded when he got within hearing range. He tried to reach out and touch me, but I shrank back. Angela, noticing the tension, made her excuses and took off for the library, throwing a few worried glances back at me. I simply nodded at her and she continued on, though she never lost the concerned look.

"Why do you even care?" I finally asked him, silently berating myself for even talking to him. I heard Edward exclaim 'No, Jasper!' from across the parking lot just a second before Jasper opened his mouth to speak.

"Don't be such a bitch, Bella. What the fuck happened to your face? Tell me who done it and I'll kill them," he promised darkly. I barely even noticed, still stuck on his first sentence. Did he seriously just call me a bitch?

_Roger that. That would be a big 10-4. _

"I abjure you," I whispered, staring into his angry black eyes. I could feel the tears running down my face, but was helpless to stop them. This was it. I was cutting my tie to the Cullen's, even Jasper. Especially Jasper. And it hurt like hell.

"Bella, no," Jasper gasped, horrified, no doubt feeling my pain and resolve. "I'm so sorry, Bella. Please forgive me. Look, I suck at apologies and I spent the whole time you were gone searching for you just so I could tell you how sorry I was." He pinched the bridge of his nose, a move that he had picked up from Edward.

"Then I saw your face today, and I got mad that someone had hit you, and I just...lost it. I didn't mean to call you a bitch. I didn't mean it. You're special and I care about you, Bella. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to run Wednesday. I was just so overwhelmed...I'm not used to dealing with this shit and I suck at it. Forgive me. I promise never to leave you again. I swear it. Bella, look at me."

But it was too late; I was already looking through him. I had made my choice and his words only solidified my decision. It wasn't the first time that I had heard that same promise from a vampire, after all. I turned around and walked towards my first class, ignoring every word that he spoke and every plea that he uttered.


	15. Chapter 15

**Jasper POV**

**.**

"Dear God, she's spread the crazy to Angela," Edward muttered as we watched Angela's car pull into the school parking lot. This had become a routine during the past month. They switched off on who drove, but they always rode together. It was a Wednesday, the first day that we'd been able to attend school this week due to the sun.

"What do you mean, bro?" Emmett asked, taking the bait. Edward simply laughed and shook his head.

"Just watch. Angela's fixing to start it."

I had to admit that I was curious. Bella had been ignoring us all for the past month. It was like we weren't even there to her anymore. Not once in the last 37 days had she even looked our way. Not one single time. I had to admit that it hurt.

Bella wasn't taking it very well either. She had lost at least ten pounds and dark circles had become a permanent fixture under her eyes. She looked more like a hungry vampire than I did, and I hadn't fed in a week. Her nightmares had also become much worse. It was to the point where she wouldn't even stay the night at Angela's house anymore.

Edward had seen Bella's night terrors through Angela's mind, and told us about them. To say that they were bad was like saying that World War II was a small scuffle. The only bright points in Bella's world these days were Angela and her father. She hadn't even been her normal crazy self since she uttered those three little words to me. I abjure you. Never have I hated 3 words more.

They climbed out of the car and started towards class, just like any other day. I didn't notice anything different than normal, and trust me, I watched Bella closely every day, just waiting for her to break rank and at least look at me again. I missed the crazy little human, badly.

"Wait for it," Edward murmured, an amused smile playing on his face.

"Hey, Bella?" Angela asked quietly.

"Hmm?" Bella replied absently. She was lost in her thoughts, not really paying much attention.

"Shut up, woman, get on my horse," Angela said loudly. Bella's head whipped around and she stared at her friend in shock. A huge grin slowly covered her face. And then the fuckery began.

"Look at my horse, my horse is amazing. Give it a lick," Bella said.

"Mmm.. it tastes just like raisins," Angela quickly cut in, using a high pitched voice.

"Stroke on its mane, it turns into a plane...And then it turns back again, when you tug on its winky."

"Eww, that's durty," Angela squealed, barely containing her laughter. Everyone outside was watching them at this point, all radiating shock. I was 100% sure that it wasn't Bella's behavior that was shocking them.

"Do you think so? Well I better not show...you... where the lemonade is made. Sweet lemonade... Mmm sweet lemonade," Bella hummed.

"Sweet lemonade.. yeah, sweet lemonade," Angela and Bella sang together. They were both giggling by this point.

"Get on my horse, I'll take you round the Uni-verse...and allll...the other places too," Bella sang.

"I think you'll find that the Uni-verse pretty much covers everything," Angela squeaked out between her laughs.

"Shut up, woman, get on my horse!" Bella finished loudly, and then they both collapsed into a fit of laughter.

"Holy shit, I think I'm in love. Anyone who could corrupt little Angela Webber is bomb in my book," Emmett exclaimed loudly. Surprisingly Rose just nodded in agreement.

And then a miracle happened. Bella turned her head around and stared at us, still leaning on Angela and laughing. She watched us for 12 seconds, sobering up slightly, but still chuckling occasionally.

"Thanks, Em. Love you, too," Bella said softly, shocking us all. She turned back to Angela and told her that she'd see her later. Then she started walking toward her first class. She wasn't ignoring us anymore. She had looked at us, and actually spoken to Emmett. Now was my chance, I couldn't wait any longer. I took off after her, ignoring the protests coming from Alice and Edward.

"Bella, wait up," I called after her. To my surprise, she actually stopped. I cautiously approached her, wary that this might be some trick. With Bella one never knew. But she just stood there, eyes downcast, staring at the ground. She looked even worse up close, like she hadn't slept in weeks.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I know those words are inadequate, but they're all I've got. I was a pussy, a coward. I shouldn't have left that night, and for as long as I exist, I will never forgive myself for it. I was such an idiot, darlin. You have to forgive me. I..I've missed you," I admitted quietly.

Nothing. She just stood there, staring at the grass like it was going to up and do the cha-cha. Hell, in her head maybe it was. Why wouldn't she say anything to me? Even a 'get screwed' would be better than this not talking bullshit. I had just sincerely apologized to this little human girl, and she can't even open her mouth and talk to me? I could count on one hand the number of people that I had ever given a true apology to. I was a fucking vampire, for fuck's sake. Screw this shit.

"Would you fucking look at me, Bella? Don't I deserve even that much? I'm fucking sorry, okay. I'm not perfect, but, dammit Bella, neither are you. You're secretive, and you lie through your fucking teeth, not to mention the fact that you're mad as a fucking hatter! But you know what? For some fucked up reason, I have become attached to you. I care about you, you silly, crazy little human!" I finished, not noticing that my voice had risen during my tirade.

And then I realized what I'd said. Shit! Was it too late to backtrack? I had been waiting for over a month to apologize to Bella, and then I went and fucked it all up. She would never talk to me again, and I deserved it. But, of course, Bella surprised me yet again. She raised her head up and met my eyes for the first time in over a month. And then she fucking smiled at me.

"There's the Jasper that I know and love. So you're attached to me, huh? You've sure got a funny way of showing it. Why should I forgive you Jasper?" she asked me, still smiling.

"Because I'm sorry, and I feel like shit for what I did. Because we're friends and I miss you," I told her honestly. She raised an eyebrow at me and waved her hand in a 'continue on' gesture.

"Because...we are going to be family someday?" I stated, although it came out as more of a question. She had spoken the same words to me on more than one occasion. As usual, I had no idea what she meant, but I threw the words back at her none-the-less.

"Damn straight," she replied, laughing. "You can't stay mad at family. It's a rule." She immediately sobered when she started to speak again.

"I forgive you, Jasper, I do. I think I forgave you before you even left. But that doesn't mean that it will be easy for me to forget. I have...issues with letting shit go, and...you really hurt me. You don't even know..." she trailed off, a haunted look in her eyes.

That look cut through my undead heart like a knife. I wrapped my arms around her, and hugged her to me as hard as I dared. She didn't complain, simply clung to me even tighter. I could smell the salty tears that were silently sliding down her face.

"I'm so sorry, darlin, so damn sorry," I whispered to her, running my hand over her hair repeatedly, soothing her. She just sniffled, still holding on to me for dear life. I dimly registered the bell ringing, but I did nothing to acknowledge it. I just held Bella to me, thankful that she had forgiven me. I had no doubt that I would make her forget, given time. I would prove myself to her in whatever way it took.

"I fucking missed you," Bella sobbed into my shirt. Then she looked up at me, swollen puffy eyes staring into mine, and asked, "Will you help me sleep tonight? Please? I haven't slept in so long..."

"Anything," I promised her, and I meant it. She sighed happily, and buried her face back into my shirt. I felt Alice's jealousy spike from across the parking lot, but chose to ignore it.

"You want to ditch today, darlin? We could go back to the house and you could meet Carlisle and Esme. They've been wanting to meet you," I told her quietly. I didn't expect her to accept, but Esme would never have let me hear the end of it if I wouldn't have asked.

"Sure, Jasper, whatever you want," she whispered into my shirt, shocking me. She took a step back, wiping the tears from her face with the black of her hand. She started digging around in her backpack, looking for something. I sent her a wave of curiosity, and she rewarded me with a small smile.

"I'm looking for my phone. Angela drove today, so I just have to send her a quick text and let her know that I'm leaving," she explained. "Charlie has one too, a cell phone that is. We got them after the whole pizza incident," she said absently, still digging.

Aw, yes, the pizza incident. I cringed. I would have to get the whole story from her soon. From what Edward could pick from Angela's brain, Bella had found out about her father's wreck from a person who was working at the pizza place where the wreck had occurred. The pizza worker had their information confused, though, and told Bella that her father had been killed. She ended up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, and a busted up face. Edward never did find out the actual reason behind Bella's black eyes, something that I was none too pleased with.

"Alright, I'm good," she said after she found her phone and pressed a few keys on it. "Let's go before someone sees us. The Cullen gang over there isn't exactly inconspicuous," she said, nodding her head toward the rest of my family.

"That's for sure," I chuckled. "Look, Bella, you don't have to come to the house today if you don't want to. I'm not trying to force you to do something that you're not ready to do. I just know that Esme has been wanting to meet you since the first time she heard about you."

"It's alright, Jasper," she said softly. "I've known this day was coming for a while now. It's time for me to let go of the past, since it never really happened in this reality. It's not fair for me to hold shit against people who...never did what I'm holding against them," she said, shrugging to enforce her point.

I was happy for her that she was making progress on letting go of her bitterness. I had a feeling that she was more than entitled to it, but it's not exactly healthy on a person to hold it all inside. I'm an empath, I know these things.

"Even if the bastards would have, if left to their own devices," she muttered under her breath as we headed towards the car. Okay, so maybe the progress was slow-going.


	16. Chapter 16

**Bella POV**

**.**

As we walked into the Cullen house, I started to seriously question my sanity.

_Yeah, like it was never in question before._

What had I agreed to? Why was I even here? Sure, I had resolved myself to try and get along with the Cullen's. I needed them here for my own selfish reasons, after all. But, damn, did I have to come here this soon?

_You've had over a month to think about this. Do you really want to lose your only chance to find Peter? No, didn't think so. _

After abjuring Jasper and the Cullen's, I spent a lot of time thinking through what I'd done. If I ever pissed the Cullen's off bad enough for them to leave, then Peter would never come to Forks and I'd never meet him. I simply couldn't allow that. So I had schemed a-

_We schemed, bitch. Give me some credit too!_

Grr! Fine, we schemed and decided that our best option would be to play nice with the Cullen's, at least until Peter arrived. All bets were off after that, though. So, I had accepted Jasper's apology.

_The fact that you haven't slept for over two hours at a time for the last month might factor in there as well._

That's true. Fuck yeah, I'm gonna sleep tonight! Actual fucking sleepage!

_Yeah, I somehow doubt that 'sleepage' is a word. Sleeeep, it's what you do for me. Ohhh sleeep, it's what you do for me._

You sing about as well as I do, which is by no means a compliment. Now shut up, and let me concentrate. All the vampires are staring at me again.

_Yes'm, ma'am. Zippin the lips._

"Hi, I'm Bella," I said stupidly, even throwing in a little wave.

_Brilliant, just brilliant. Your intellect never ceases to amaze me._

"Hello Bella, I'm Esme and this is my husband Carlisle," Esme said, cautiously extending her hand to me. I just barely stifled my chuckle at her caution. As if I could ever be scared of her. My amusement was not unnoticed by Jasper, and I heard a chuckle escape from him as I shook Esme's hand.

Emmett came up to me then and surprised me by picking me up in a bear hug. He spun me around until I was breathless from my laughter. He finally set me down, and Jasper had to grab my arm to steady me.

"Son of a bitch, Emmett! Do you _want_ me to puke all over your floor? I had a breakfast date with Lucky the leprechaun this morning so you don't even want to know what my puke would look like. Although it would add some color in here..." I trailed off when I noticed the appalled looks on Carlisle and Esme's faces. Whoops. I could literally feel my face turn red, Emmett's guffawing not helping one bit.

"Lucky the leprechaun? I know you said she was a little...challenged, but does she honestly believe she had breakfast with a leprechaun this morning?" Esme asked Edward at vamp speed. I choked on air, trying to keep from laughing.

_What the fuck? And I repeat- What the fuck?_

You took the words from my mouth. Jasper was glancing between Esme and me, his forehead scrunched in thought. He now knew. He had just realized that I had heard her, even though she was using vampire speed when she talked. Damn, now I was going to miss out on all the secret squirrel shit.

"Nah, mom," Emmett answered her, also using vamp speed. "It's just a name for a colorful breakfast cereal. I've seen the commercials for it a million times during SpongeBob. It's magically delicious." My lips twitched, unsuccessfully trying to hold back a smile.

"Why in the world would anyone, even a human, want to eat a cereal called 'Lucky the leprechaun'? Isn't that a little...raunchy?" Esme asked, sounding puzzled. And that's when I lost it. I laughed, I honestly couldn't help it. I laughed and laughed.

"It's...called..Lucky Charms," I choked out, between laughs. Suddenly all of the Cullen's were laughing loudly, and I realized that Jasper was projecting.

"Reign that shit in, Jasper," I laughed, because that was all I was capable of doing at the moment. Sometime during my laughing fit, I had let my control slip and Jasper was getting bombarded with my humor. He was sending it right back to me, and it was all just a big circular clusterfuck of laughter.

Finally, he got control enough to stop projecting, and I locked my shield down tight. Well, at least some of the awkward tension in the room had been broken. I followed Jasper into the living room, and sat down on the sofa beside him.

"So, I don't know what all Jasper has told you about me," I said after a short period of silence.

"I didn't tell them anything that you told me," Jasper assured me quickly, earning himself a glare from Alice. I smiled at him and pushed my shield out to encompass him.

"Okay, well...I have visions, that's how I knew you all," I lied smoothly, watching the shock register on Jasper's face as he felt my deception. It wasn't polite to lie to family, after all. It was time that he knew this little jewel of truth. I locked my eyes with his and saw him nod his head slightly. Message received.

Alice perked up and immediately started asking me questions. She was up on her feet, excitedly walking toward me, arms extended, as if to give me a hug. I shrank down into Jasper's side, uncomfortable and slightly panicked at the invasion of space. She was the first female vampire to approach me so brazenly since Victoria, and I was finding that I really did not fucking like it.

Jasper instantly wrapped his arms around me, shushing me like a frightened child. He was still under my shield, so I knew that he was feeling everything that I felt. I was breathing hard, quickly approaching a full on panic attack. I knew Alice wouldn't really hurt me, didn't I? Why was I being so irrational about this? I didn't know, but I damn sure couldn't control it.

"That is _MY_ husband," I heard Alice hiss at the same time that Jasper dosed me with a wave of calm. Just like that, my panic attack was forgotten. I had better things to do. I slowly unwrapped myself from Jasper, and stood to my feet.

"I am well aware that he is your husband, Alice. I view him as a brother and have no romantic interests whatsoever in your mate. I already have a mate," I informed her calmly.

"I don't believe you," she growled at me.

_Bitch say what?_

"Do you want me to stay away from Jasper, Alice? Do you want me to leave your precious little family alone?" I sneered.

"Yes," she hissed back. "I can't see you at all, Edward can't hear your thoughts, and you've apparently got Jasper wrapped around your little finger. You are a threat to me and to this family. I should rip out a piece of your pretty little neck, see if you think you're so damn perfect then. Maybe we should just pack up and leave here, forget all about you.''

"You think I see myself as perfect, Alice?" I asked, laughing bitterly. "You couldn't be more wrong. I know that I'm flawed. I know that I'm just a distraction to your perfect little family. I know that I'm worthless to you and that none of your family thinks I'm good enough, but fuck-it-all if I'm going to let any of you stand in the way of my happiness again.

"You want to just pack up and leave again, Alice? What is it with you Cullen's and leaving? Things get tough and you just up and fucking leave without so much as a 'fuck-off'. Well, not this time, Alice. Never again. If you want to leave now, it will be over my dead fucking body because my mate will be coming to visit your shitty little family soon, and you're fucking going to be in Forks when he comes. After that, the whole lot of you can go join the damn Volturi for all I care. But you WILL stay right the fuck here until he comes!" I ended with a scream.

I stood there shaking, gasping for breath. I instantly regretted how much I'd let slip out. I should never have come here. I should have stayed far away from every last one of them.

"Take me home, Jasper," I whispered hoarsely, silently begging him with my emotions. He stared at me, his head snapping back and forth between me and Alice so fast that he looked like a funny cartoon character. I left him sitting there, and started for the door. If nothing else, I would fucking walk home.

"Bella, wait. I'm sorry. Please...you don't have to go. I was just jealous. I thought you wanted to steal Jasper from me, and I couldn't let that happen. I had no idea that you already had a mate," she said, gazing at me sincerely, trying to let me know that she meant what she said.

"Bella, I promise that I won't bite your pretty neck and make you any less perfect," she said with a smile, attempting to lighten the mood with humor.

_Oh Alice, if you only knew the half of it..._

I saw everyone smile except Jasper and Edward, who were both staring at Alice in horror. Honestly, I did see the humor in it, but I would never let her know that.

"It would just be one more to add to the lot if you did, Alice," I said, smiling sadly at her. I pulled my hoodie off and stood in just a tank top, scars exposed for all to see. After much growling and hissing, I started to feel a little like a freak show habitant. I quickly shoved the hoodie back on, not meeting anyone's eyes.

"Oh Bella," Esme whispered, taking a step toward me. I froze up. Suddenly I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't stand here and let the woman that I had once considered a mother comfort me again. She was the same woman who had left me, her supposed daughter, to fend for myself in a world of monsters. It was all too much.

I panicked and dropped my shield, letting Jasper feel all my anguish. Confusion and betrayal fought with love until I honestly couldn't tell if I loved the woman or wanted to rend her limb from limb. Jasper froze and had to double over for a second, but he quickly got himself under control. He ran to me and scooped me up, about two seconds before Esme made it to me.

He ran me outside and all I could do was murmur 'thank you, thank you' over and over until he set me in his truck and buckled me in. I leaned my head against the window and closed my eyes. The next thing I knew, Jasper was carrying me into my room and laying me down on the bed.

"Stay with me?" I murmured sleepily. I didn't want the nightmares to consume me. All I wanted to do was fall into the blackness for a while.

"Of course," he said softly, and then I was out.


	17. Chapter 17

**Jasper's POV**

**.**

"Son of a bitch!"

The muttered words stunned me for a full three seconds. I dropped the inaccurate history book that I had been reading, and raced to the door. I threw it open and watched in shock as Bella's rusty old truck came clunking up the driveway. The rest of the family joined me within seconds.

"What is she doing here? It's two o'clock in the morning," Esme murmured, voicing everyone's unspoken question. I had taken Bella home around noon and stayed with her until she woke up at six. She got up to go make dinner for Charlie, and I promised her that I would come back that night to help her sleep. She had declined, stating that she probably wouldn't be able to sleep after sleeping all day.

So I had come home, only to be bombarded with questions before I even stepped through the front door. I told them what Bella had told me about her visions, and how she had met us in one. I even told them that I was almost positive that during her vision, we had eventually left her for some unknown reason. I told them that she had admitted to having trouble separating what had really happened from what had happened in her vision. And with good reason too, I thought as I explained that her vision had went over a year into the future.

I told them about her shield, and how she had been kidnapped by a 'vampire with a vendetta', as she had put it. They all wanted to know how she escaped, but I couldn't tell them because even I didn't know. Her scars bothered me, mostly because that part of her story didn't add up. My thoughts had tried to return to what I had learned earlier in the day, but I pushed that shit down and stopped it before Edward caught it. I didn't even know what to make of it, and the last thing I wanted was an inquisition from the befuddled mind reader. Even though he was confused and didn't understand what his feelings for Bella were, I could feel them as well and knew that his interest in her was dangerously close to turning into infatuation.

We also talked about the fact that Bella seemed to understand us, even when we used 'vamp talk'. It explained a lot, actually, and we all winced as we remembered quite a few talks that we'd had at lunch about how batshit crazy she was. She would have heard every word.

Alice and I also had a long talk and, hopefully, resolved a few of our issues. She was still a little jealous of Bella, even after I had assured her that Bella felt nothing but brotherly love for me and that I sure as shit wasn't interested in her romantically. I was still a little upset about the way that she'd treated Bella earlier, but Alice had promised me that she was sorry, and I could feel that she was sincere. Plus, Esme and Edward had already jumped her ass once they recovered from their shock, and she was feeling pretty awful about everything she'd said. We had both agreed to forgive and forget, and we'd spent a very nice three hours making up.

"I forgot...son of a twice-staked vampire whore, I forgot!" Bella muttered, drawing me back to the present. Her truck came to a stop and I ran out to meet her as she put it in park. It was pouring down rain and I wanted to get her into the house as fast as possible.

I opened the truck door and actually gasped at the sight that greeted me. Bella was already soaked, the water actually still dripping from the strands of her hair that were plastered to her face. Her face was red and puffy, obvious evidence that she had been crying. She was wearing only a thin long-sleeved shirt and a pair of ratty sweat pants, both of which looked to be about 2 sizes too big for her.

But her eyes are what worried me the most. The term 'crazy eyes' had never been used more accurately. They kept darting back and forth, constantly flickering in every direction as if scanning for danger. She was paranoid, I realized. Bella was watching for something or someone, and if it had the crazy human this scared, I supposed that I'd better be on the lookout as well.

"Bella, what's wrong? Did someone follow you?" I asked, nodding in approval as I saw Edward and Emmett slip off into the woods to investigate. Those crazy brown eyes snapped to mine and I actually exhaled as I saw a little bit of clarity return to them.

"Jasper," she breathed. "I have to tell you...I just...How could I forget?"

"Shh..It's okay. Look, I love the rain just as much as the next vampire, but I'd really appreciate it if you let me take you into the house, darlin. We're both soaked to the bone as it is," I said softly, hoping that she'd agree.

"Yeah, that would be...dryer," she replied, a small smile on her lips. My relief in that moment was palpable. Lucid Bella was returning and I was as tickled as a fly on shit. I grabbed her up and ran her to the house at vampire speed, silently wondering if it was normal for humans to be so light.

I sat her down right inside the door and watched as she took the towel that Esme handed her and wrapped it around herself. She looked like a depressed drowned rat in oversized clothing. Not a pretty sight. Alice quietly zipped up the stairs, only to return a few seconds later.

"Bella, I have some dry clothes you can change into, if you'd like," my wife said, holding her peace offering of clothes out in front of her. Bella looked at her warily, opened her mouth to speak, and then shut it once more. A wide grin spread across her face, and I unwittingly took a step back from her. Crazy Bella was not a safe Bella, even to vampires. I heard Edward's chuckle, no doubt at my last thought, just a second before both he and Alice gasped. I felt their shock and disbelief spike, and it was my turn to glance warily at Bella, who was still smiling like a loon. Great. Just great.

"I saw you!" Alice exclaimed. She quickly frowned, though, and hugged her clothes to her chest. "That was not a very nice thing to say. What did they ever do to you?" Okay, I was officially lost.

"Alice saw Bella in a vision," Edward explained as he and Emmett walked through the front door. "And, no, we didn't see anyone in the woods," he answered before I could even open my mouth to ask.

"I can't see you anymore! I saw what you decided to say about the clothes, but I can't see anything else. Shame on you, by the way. These are Christian Dior," Alice muttered.

"I know," Bella started, but was cut short because she was, once again, subjected to the rain...well, sort of. Emmett had decided to dry himself off by shaking like a dog. Unfortunately, he decided to do it while standing next to Bella, who was now pissed.

"Dammit, Emmett, what do you think you are- a dogpire? A vamp-wawa? If I had wanted wet mutt, I would've went to Jakes," Bella muttered, now trying to shake herself off.

"Jake?" Edward murmured at the same time that Emmett asked, "Vamp-wawa?"

"Yeah, you know...vampire chihuahua. Never mind," she said, shaking her head.

"Chihuahua? I'll have you know that I am not a chihuahula!" Emmett exclaimed. "I'd be more of a..." he trailed off, clearly needing more time to decide what dog he'd be like.

"A Puli-pire? Yeah, let's go with that," Bella laughed.

"What the hell is a puli?" Emmett asked. Esme gave him 'the look' and he immediately said, "Sorry, Mom. What the _heck_ is a puli?"

"Google it, Em," Bella said absently, now trying to wring some of the water out of her clothes. It was pointless. She needed new clothes. Apparently she agreed with me because she finally asked Alice, "Do you have any clothes that cost less than my truck?"

Alice huffed and ran back upstairs, soon returning with a pair of bright pink sweats and a long sleeved plain white t-shirt. She thrust them into Bella's waiting arms and glanced at her expectantly.

"Pink sweats? Really, Alice? I'm going to look like something Barbie puked up. Ugh," Bella muttered as she walked into the bathroom. Four minutes and fifty six seconds later, she opened the door. I could feel the shock radiating off of my family, and I was right there with them. Bella was so small and fragile looking when she actually wore clothes that fit her. It was unreal.

"Well, let's get this party started," Bella mumbled under her breath. She walked into the living room and sat down. I sat beside her, the rest of the family each finding their own places as well. She was getting nervous again, anxiously pulling and tugging at her shirt sleeves.

"Look, I know you all have questions, but I...this is hard for me. Please just...promise me you will all leave Forks until at least Monday," she finally blurted. She actually slapped her hand over her mouth in surprise and muttered under her breath, "Stupid, stupid Bella. This is important and you're fucking it all up!"

We all watched the human warily as she continued to mutter. Her emotions told me that she was as close to losing it as she had been when she pulled into our yard. I had never experienced a creature go from panic to calm to panic again as quickly as Bella. To say she was unique was a severe understatement. I tried to send her calm, but it seemed to flow right off of her. Why was our leaving Forks this weekend so important to her?

"I'll go get her a glass of water," Alice said quietly. She walked by us and to everyone's surprise, Bella's hand shot out and closed around her wrist.

"Wait, Alice. I have to warn you. I should have already told you, but...I-I just...it's so hard to think about, let alone talk about. The time passed so quickly," she ranted, eyes distant once again.

"It's alright, Bella. I'll be right back and you can tell me all about it, okay?" Alice said softly, treating Bella like the spooked animal that she'd become right before our eyes. The entire family was feeling compassion and pity for the human, even if Rose's emotions were mixed with anger towards her as well.

"No! No, wait. Alice you have to listen to me. You...you don't remember your human life," Bella said slowly and I felt a surge of victory come from her before she began speaking again. This time the words flew from her mouth so quickly that I was glad I was a vampire so I could keep up.

"You don't remember your human life, right? You don't know who changed you or why. I can tell you that, Alice. I can tell you everything. All you have to do is just agree to leave this weekend. All of you. Just go hunting or shopping or something. You just can't come back until at least Monday night. Okay? Do you agree?"

We all just stared at her, stunned. We were all speechless for a few seconds until I felt Rose's anger rise. She had never enjoyed being told what to do.

"You cannot possibly think that there is anything that your little human self could warn us about that we couldn't defend ourselves against-"

"For once in your life, Rose, shut your damn mouth and just listen. I am trying to save us all, you stupid bitch so shut. The. Fuck. Up," Bella screamed hysterically, jumping to her feet. "Stupid vampires. Stupid idiotic dumb vampires that think they're so big and bad when they're really nothing but tame ass little kittenpires.."

"Damn," Emmett mumbled under his breath. "I was really looking forward to playing baseball on Sunday."

"Nooo!" Bella shrieked. And then it hit me...and knocked me the fuck back. Her pain and anguish slammed into me like a fist, leaving me doubled over and projecting that shit as far as I could just so I could receive a tiny bit of relief from it. Sweet hells, it was agony! Complete and total misery.

I could hear the groans of pain from my family, but was helpless to do anything about it just yet. I concentrated all my effort into blocking Bella's emotions. After what felt like eternity, but was actually only a few minutes, I was finally able to start pulling the emotions back into me. I didn't think it possible, but it hurt even worse. Every single little bit that I pulled back into myself hurt that much more, but I finally got that shit reigned in.

"T-That was what Bella was feeling?" Edward asked in disbelief. But he knew. Of course he did. He could see it in my head, in my thoughts.

"What you received was only a fraction of what she was feeling, what she is _still_ feeling," I spit out between clenched teeth, finally managing to unfold from my crumpled position. I quickly scooped up Bella, and sat her down in my lap. I pushed some calm into her, shushing her as I did so. Only then did I notice that she was mumbling under her breath. I strained my already sensitive hearing to try and catch what she was saying.

"No, no, no. No! I can't live through it again...can't see Charlie dead again...can't let that bitch catch me again...can't let him touch me, won't let James touch me or Renee...not Renee...can't let him get her...can't let her get her...no, no, no. Oh shit, Victoria. No! Can't go through that again...so many bites...stop, it burns...like hell...burning alive...over and over...can't take it again...death would be better...would be better than the fire...poor angel, poor poor angel, all alone then...no, no, no."

She quit mumbling and started whimpering. The heartbreaking sound reminded me of an injured animal. I shhed her the best I could and then just held her as the sobs started. Thankfully the family had been deathly silent, allowing me to comfort her the best I could. Esme had been restraining herself, desperately wanting to comfort Bella. She finally gave in to the desire and took a step toward us, arms outstretched. Bella's head snapped up and she huddled in closer to me, burying her face in my shirt. After a few seconds she glanced up and trained her haunted eyes back on Esme.

"Family doesn't leave their own behind, Esme. You left me and let her have me. You don't know the things she did, the hell I went through," Bella whispered, shuddering. Esme stopped in her tracks, stunned. Bella burrowed back into me as I rocked her small form. Soon her soft snores could be heard, letting us know she'd fallen asleep.

"We must have left her in one of her visions," Edward murmured. My mind threatened to replay the information that I had learned yesterday, but I forced it away. I would think of it later, when I was alone in my head. I let myself start to piece together what must have happened in Bella's 'vision'.

"She's hinted at it before, talking about having to remember that what happened in her vision hadn't actually happened in reality. Hell, I even felt the love and longing she had for all of us that first day in that cafeteria, even if it was buried with enough anguish and betrayal to drop me to my knees. Now those emotions make sense as well," I mumbled. Edward nodded in agreement and sent me a small wave of impatience when I didn't say anything else. Was he really going to make me say it?

"Would you explain it to all us non-gifted vamps, please," Emmett said angrily, gaze glued to Bella's fragile form.

"In her vision we welcomed her, made her a part of our family. We told her our secrets and allowed her to love us, and then for some reason or another, we left her. Left her here unprotected. Left her to the bitch that tortured and scarred her.

"She couldn't forget because in her vision it all actually happened. She told me herself that it was the way things would have happened if she hadn't changed them. She has been around us for months even though she knew that we would have eventually betrayed her if she had let things play out as they should have. No wonder she tried to avoid us for so long," I said, feeling like I understood Bella just a little bit better. I still wasn't quite sure how she came to be a part of our family, but Bella was extremely likeable so it didn't surprise me one bit. Edward, who had been listening to my thoughts, nodded his head once in agreement and then voiced the one question that I'm sure was at the front of all our minds.

"The only thing I don't get is her scars. If the scars happened later, after we left, then she shouldn't have the scars now because it all happened in a vision. Unless..." he trailed off.

"Unless what happens to her body in visions affects her body in reality," Alice finished, throwing an uneasy glance at Bella.

Or if it actually happened and there was no vision, I thought to myself, pieces falling together inside my mind. But of course, my thoughts weren't just my own. Edwards head snapped towards me and I immediately started to recite Edgar Allen Poe's The Black Cat inside my head...in pig Latin. Yeah, he hated that shit.

"What was that supposed to mean?" he growled loudly, irritation pouring from him because he knew I was keeping something from him. Bella stirred in my arms and I let out my own growl, pissed that Edward had awoken her. She lifted her head and glanced up at me warily. She offered me a shaky smile before scooting off my lap and walking towards the kitchen.

We all watched in silence as she opened one of the upper cabinets and grabbed one of the glasses that we kept for show. She walked to the sink and filled it up, then turned and opened one of the bottom cabinets to grab Carlisle's first aid kit. She set it on the counter and opened it, immediately grabbing the bottle of Tylenol and dumping two out into her hand. She swallowed them with a big gulp of water, and then looked up and saw us staring at her. She blushed furiously and glanced down to the glass of water in her hand.

"Uhh...I-I'm sorry?" she stuttered out, her face still a brilliant red.

"It's fine dear," Esme said softly, emotion thick in her voice. Bella's casual ease and familiarity of our house just hammered home all the things that we had just been discussing. Bella set the glass of water down on the counter carefully and walked back into the living room with her head down, looking all the more like a scolded puppy. I sent her a wave of humor and she graced me with a small smile before cutting off all emotion from me.

She sat down next to me and said in a defeated voice, "I'm sorry. For everything, I'm sorry. It seems that every single time I step foot in this house now I breakdown." She sighed and met our eyes and even though I couldn't feel it, I could see the determination fill her.

"Look, I know you all probably think that I am just an emotional twit, but you have to at least listen to me. Just hear me out, alright? That's all I'm asking," she said, looking directly at Alice.

"Alright," Alice agreed softly. "We will listen."

"Okay. Good. Alright, I can do this," Bella muttered under her breath. She looked up at Alice and whispered softly, "Alice, you were in an asylum when you were human."

Alice gasped and I quickly got up off the sofa and went to her, wrapping her in my arms as I felt her emotions start to swirl. Bella cleared her throat and we all glanced back at her to see her rubbing her arm nervously. She hadn't even noticed that she had pushed up her sleeve and was rubbing the single bite mark that stood apart from the others.

"I know this has got to be hard for you to hear, Alice, but you have to understand that it's hard for me to talk about it as well. I need to just spit it all out and I'll try to answer your questions afterword, okay?" she asked, biting her bottom lip nervously. Alice simply nodded, giving Bella the go ahead to begin.

"Okay, so like I said, when you were human you were in an asylum because of your visions. It seems that you had them even when you were human. Umm...there was a vampire that worked there that was really fond of you and took care of you. He umm...changed you to save you?" She made it into a question, once again biting at her lip. Suddenly I felt her emotions again and saw her eyes silently pleading with me to help her. I nodded my head and sent her some calm and confidence. She instantly straightened from the hunched position that she'd taken when she first sat.

"Fuck, I'm messing this all up," she muttered. "I have to make you all understand the danger that I'm in if he finds me. The danger that we are all in. In my-" There was a slight pause that every vampire in the room noticed.

"Vision," she finally whispered. "In my vision, you had accepted me into your family. We went to play baseball on Sunday." She smiled slightly, still staring at her feet. "Well, all of you played, I stood with Esme and watched. By the way Emmett, you would have totally lost. You may hit hard, but Edward is just so fast..." she trailed off, still smiling at her thoughts. Edward's chuckle snapped her to attention and she started talking once again.

"Part-way through the game, Alice saw them coming. They heard the game and decided to check it out. There were three of them, all nomads. James, Victoria, and Laurent. Laurent tried to act like their leader, but Edward could hear their thoughts and knew that the real leader, and threat, was James. James caught my scent and thought that you'd brought a snack. Edward let him know real quick that I wasn't just a snack." She smiled softly at the memory and I could feel her love for him in that moment.

I suddenly knew how she'd become a part of our family. Edward's shock and disbelief hit me and I realized that he had once again been listening in. I shrugged, not knowing what else to do. I glanced at Bella and was stunned by how young she looked. She looked like a totally different girl sitting there, and in that moment I realized that this must have been how she looked before she was introduced to the monsters in the world. I could easily see how Edward could have fallen in love with her.

In the next instant, however, Bella changed. The softness was gone from her face, replaced by the haunted, world-wary look that usually resided on her. It was like I could actually see the innocent girl being replaced with the 'I've seen the things of nightmares and lived to tell about it' woman. It was rather disturbing, actually.

"Edward, Alice, and Emmett took me and strapped me into the jeep. Edward was freaking out, saying that we had to get far away and I was screaming that I couldn't just leave because I was terrified that Charlie would call the FBI and they would find out about you...but I guess you aren't interested in all that, are you. Edward saw in James' mind that he was a tracker. It was a gift of sorts, I guess you could say. When James saw me, he decided that he had to have me.

"Long story short, he did get me, in Phoenix actually. He decided to make a movie of torturing me to send to you. I ended up with a broken leg, four broken ribs, some cracks to my skull, bruises covering every inch of my body, this lovely bite mark on my arm, and I lost most of my blood. They had to give me several blood transfusions. Edward didn't like that very much. He said that I smelled funny afterwards." That soft smile was back on her face again, transforming her into an innocent child.

"Okay, I see why _you_ would want to stay away from the nomads, but as far as I can see this has nothing to do with me or my family. You being there was the only reason anything like that happened," Rose said in her usual bitchy tone, although I could feel she was honestly more curious than anything. The smile left Bella's face, replaced by a carefully constructed neutral expression.

"I'm sorry for getting off topic, Rose. I'll try to stick to the parts that deal only with your family from now on," she stated evenly, although I could feel the hurt pouring off of her. She glanced at me and cut her emotions totally off, before beginning again in a dull, lifeless tone.

"The whole reason that James was making the video was to try and entice Edward into hunting him. He said that Edward wouldn't be able to resist hunting him after he watched it. He also said that everything he'd done was all for Edward. For a challenging game. I was simply a human who was in the wrong place, at the wrong time, running with the wrong crowd. He wanted to rub it in Edward's face that the answer was right there in his mind all along and Edward didn't see it.

"James said that it had happened once before. It was the only time that his prey had ever escaped him. He had chosen a sweet little human in an insane asylum years before, but the vampire that worked there had a soft spot for her and turned her before James could kill her. He said that she'd been subjected to shock treatments and stuck in a dark cell for so long that she didn't even notice the pain of the change. After she was changed there was no reason for him to touch her, so he destroyed the one who changed her in retaliation."

She looked straight at Alice and continued in the same tone. "It was you, Alice. That's why your maker wasn't there when you woke up. James killed him just for spoiling his game. That's the kind of monster you're dealing with here, and as big of a monster as James is, his mate Victoria still makes him look like a kitten compared to her." She with shivering, rubbing the scars further up on her arm.

"What about the third?" I asked, ever the strategist. It was just ingrained in me. Her face scrunched up into a scowl and she shrugged her shoulders.

"He came to warn you that James was going to hunt me. You told him about the Denali's' and he went up there for a while. He got together with...Irina I think it was, and tried to hunt animals. He had trouble sticking to the diet, though. He took lots of long trips to umm...indulge. He said he ran into Victoria on one of those trips and she sent him to Forks on a scouting mission. He found me and tried to kill me. He didn't know that Victoria had used him as cannon fodder for the... Anyway, he was just a distraction so she could get into my house and kill my...but yeah, none of this pertains to your family so...yeah.

"James recognized you, Alice, and he wanted to play with you and your new coven members. Please get out of here this weekend. Go hunting, or shopping, or anything. Just get out of Forks. They were just passing through before they heard the game, so I can only assume that they will continue on through if there is no baseball game for them to hear. So...yeah. There it is. Look, I've gotta go. Charlie will be getting up soon and I don't want him to know that I was gone."

She was out of the house and driving off in her truck before any of us got over the fuckery that she had just spewed enough to even notice that she'd left. Can vampires go into shock? Because, yeah, that shit was so happening.


	18. Chapter 18

Why is it every day that I feel the pain?

I can't get you out of my head

It never goes away

.

**PETER POV**

**.**

"Dude, you got knocked the fuck out!"

The annoying voice cut through my dreamlike state, leaving me feeling blank and empty as images just beyond my grasp slipped away from me for good and I was left with a crushing sense of loss. I tried to recall what I had lost, perfect fucking vampire memory and all, but came away with nothing but a vague sense of emptiness. Weird. Even the forever annoying ghosts in my head, known to everyone else as my 'gift' of knowing shit, were quiet for once. Too fucking quiet.

"The fuck?" I muttered, shaking my head and opening my eyes for the first time. I raised my head up and looked around. I was splayed out on a huge ass knocked over tree, arms spread wide, my wood against the...well, wood, looking all the more like I was trying to make a fucking tree angel or some shit. Fuck snow angels, real vamps use trees. Yeah.

"You ran into a fucking tree!" Garrett exclaimed, howling with laughter. I turned my head in his direction and glared. Surely there was another explanation. I mean, it's not exactly normal for a vampire to run into a fucking tree, right? Not to mention the fact that I couldn't remember doing it. All I remembered was running with my sister and her mate through the forest and then...nothing. My next memory was of waking up a fucking tree hugger.

"Leave him alone. It's obvious that his eyesight is failing in his old age," Charlotte chuckled out, burying her face in Garrett's shirt to try and muffle her laughter.

"Ha Ha. Thanks Sis, real fucking funny," I stated, finally detaching myself from the forestry. Garrett laughed even harder when he saw the perfect Peter shaped indention that was embedded at least ten inches deep in the huge redwood. Perfect. Just perfect.

"No, seriously, you were just running along and then BOOM! Right into the damn tree. Way-laid it right down. You taught that bastard a lesson, didn't you? What did that tree ever do to you man?" He laughed.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever, fucker," I muttered, rubbing my head. Was it possible for a vampire to get a headache? "Just leave it alone."

"Okay, okay," he agreed, still chuckling. "Isn't your gift telling you what happened, though? Scratch that- Didn't your gift warn you about the big bad tree that was coming your way?" He could barely get the words out because he was laughing so hard.

"No," I growled in a tone that strongly suggested he leave it at that. In truth, it kind of freaked me out a bit. I had never been without the voices in my head, even when human. I was used to the random bits of information that I would receive daily. What I wasn't used to, was the feeling of emptiness in my mind. What if my 'gift' never returned? What would I do? I had grown to rely on the voices over the years, always warning me of danger ahead of time. What if they were truly gone?

I forcefully pushed those questions from my head, assuring myself that my gift would return in time. I blocked the whole incident from my mind and turned back to Garrett.

"Are we still going to the house in Canada or what?" I asked him. We had met Garrett only a month ago in California. Charlotte had won a bet so I was forced to go on the San Francisco Vampire Tour with her. Garrett, the quirky fucker that he is, was there voluntarily. For fun. Fucker ain't got good sense sometimes. He and Charlotte hit it right off and he's followed us ever since. Kind of like a stray pup. Or that piece of toilet paper that gets stuck to the bottom of your shoe that you just can't fucking rid yourself of. Not that I would know about that, but I do watch human comedy on occasion.

"Don't get your panties in a bunch, K.O." He laughed as he grabbed Char's hand and took off running. And fuck if I didn't wish he'd slam right into a tree.

~~~~.~~~~

"Peter, I'm really worried about you. You're still not yourself," Charlotte said, walking up behind me. I was standing on the upper deck, gazing out into the forest.

"It's been almost two months, Char. I still don't know what happened or what's wrong with me," I admitted, eyes anywhere but on her. I had cast away Char's worry for almost two months, but even I knew that it was time to admit that something was very wrong.

"I...I think you're depressed," she muttered quietly. I chuckled and raised an eyebrow. "I'm serious, Peter. I googled it. You are clinically depressed." She was totally serious, I could see that.

"What I am, Char, is clinically giftless. I hit a tree and now my gift is gone. Besides, I'm bound to be a little depressed, especially after what happened in Michigan," I muttered darkly.

"That was nothing, merely a close call. Everyone is just fine, as you well know," she said softly. Close call, my ass. We had been attacked by a scouting party sent out by that cunt Maria. Four of her better vampires, each tough in their own way. My voices had been quiet, not a breath of a warning was given to me. We were taken totally by surprise, and if not for Garrett, we probably wouldn't have made it out. He certainly is a scrappy little fucker, I'll give him that. Still doesn't mean that I like hearing him screw my sister, though.

"Besides, I don't think it's just your gift missing that's bothering you." It was true. Ever since the tree incident, I felt like a piece of me was missing, something even more than my gift. My thoughts were haunted with images of big brown eyes staring at me. It was pretty creepy, really, and it freaked me right the fuck out.

"I think you should see a doctor immediately," she stated, sounding all the more like a damn TV commercial spokeswoman.

"Sure, Charlotte, let me just call one up from the yellow pages and hope that he doesn't mind the whole no-heartbeat, I-drink-blood-to-survive thing." I loved my sister dearly, but she could be quite obtuse sometimes.

"You can be such an idiot, you know that? Carlisle, Peter, I'm talking about Carlisle." I slowly shook my head even as I considered it. While it was true that Carlisle was a vampire doctor, I really didn't want this shit to get around. The last thing I needed was for that bitch Maria to find out that I was giftless. Not to mention the fact that Jasper would tease me mercilessly once he found out about the tree. Damn it all to hell, I was hoping to avoid him finding out.

"Please say you'll go. Please, Petey," Charlotte begged in a sad little voice. I sighed. She had pulled out the 'Petey'. One of the few human memories that we both retained was of Charlotte calling me 'Purty Petey' as a child. It was a memory I sometimes wished we'd both forgotten.

"Fine, I'll go. But you owe me. Do you have any idea the hell the Major is going to put me through over this? I'll be the laughing stock of the Cullen family, that's for sure."

And that is how I ended up here, in Bumfuck Washington, in front of the Cullen house. I knocked once, chuckling to myself when I noticed the human heartbeat coming from inside. The Cullen's seemed to be taking this 'playing human' thing to a whole new level. Rose opened the door and looked me over. Dismissing me with a glance, she walked back inside, leaving the door open.

"Come on in. Jasper's busy playing with the human," she declared loudly as she retreated. Jasper playing with a human couldn't end well for the human, could it? I walked inside, silently shutting the door behind me.

"Angel?" I heard a small voice whisper as I walked into the living room. I glanced up and saw those same fucking haunting brown eyes staring at me, only this time not in my mind. They were boring into me from the face of a mousy little brown haired human girl. It was very unnerving and I didn't like it one bit.

Something was wrong with her. She was different for some reason. Her eyes had haunted me for months, and I just wanted to be rid of them because it fucking hurt to see them for some reason. The emptiness inside of me seemed to multiply, leaving me feeling frightened and hostile. I finally pulled my eyes from her and glanced at Jasper, who was staring at me in shock.

"Did you pick up take-out?" I asked him at vampire speed, forcing a laugh. What the fuck was wrong with me? What the fuck was wrong with the human girl who was still just fucking staring at me?

"Peter?" She spoke to me again. Why did her voice make my very soul burn? Was she the devil?

"Don't you hate it when the V-8 talks back?" I asked nervously, forcing another laugh. No one laughed, though. I could feel the anger flowing off of Jasper, even if I didn't understand it.

"Asshole," Emmett muttered. Oops. I guess I was supposed to be nice to the creepy little human. It's not like she could hear me anyway.

"What can I help you with, kitten?" I asked her, warily glancing at her as she continued to fucking stare at me with those big brown eyes. I wrung my hands nervously, really fucking wanting to get the fuck away from the human. She was fucking all my shit up and I just wanted to retreat from the emptiness, the loss, that her eyes caused me to feel.

She finally tore her gaze from me, looking at Jasper instead. Jasper flinched as if in pain and I wondered if he felt the wrongness too.

"I've gotta get back home, Charlie's waiting on me," she said to him, giving him an uncomfortable looking smile. Jasper shook his head and glared at me.

"But you're supposed to stay the weekend here," he protested, giving her a warm smile. She shook her head over and over and started muttering that she had to go. Jasper went to grab her arm and I stopped him.

"We need to talk, Jasper. Let your little pet go. Didn't your mama ever teach you not to play with your food?" I said quietly, willing him to listen to me. The human turned and ran to the door, not even bothering to shut it behind her. Why did her leaving make me feel worse, not better? We all just stood there as we heard her truck start up and take off down the driveway.

And that's when Jasper's fist met my face, knocking me through the fucking wall and out into the yard.


	19. Chapter 19

**Jasper's POV**

**.**

"Meow."

I looked down from my spot in the tree to see a kitten staring back up at me. Brilliant blue kitten eyes met my own gold and I'll be damned if the kitten didn't start to purr and rub itself against the tree. I growled at it; it meowed again and purred even louder, still debasing itself against the forestry.

"Looks like you've got yourself an admirer," Edward chucked from his place in the next tree over. Fucking asshat. He just laughed even louder at that.

We were currently sitting in the trees surrounding Bella's house, waiting for any signs of life to show themselves. It was Monday night and we had just returned from our 'Bella-commanded' trip to Alaska. We had spent the weekend hunting and catching up with the Denali coven.

It was rather boring and I spent most of my time worrying about Bella. Although, I will admit that watching Tanya corner Edward was very entertaining. The lust that woman emitted...let's just say that Alice is a very satisfied vampire. It went a long way toward helping her with the shit that Bella dropped on her before we left.

"I should just eat the damn thing," I growled, my attention now drawn back to the purring monstrosity at the bottom of my tree. The little furball actually cocked its head and growled back at me. What the fuck? Edward chuckled then tilted his head slightly. I heard it too. Charlie's car was coming.

We both watched as the car pulled into the yard and Charlie climbed out. I had already determined that he was alone due to the lack of other heartbeats, but we still watched him as he popped the trunk and began unloading fishing poles and tackle boxes.

"He spent the whole weekend fishing with Billy Black on the reservation. Billy told him that he was having some problems with Jacob and just needed to get away for a while; convinced him to take today off work," Edward murmured, reading Charlie's thoughts.

"Sounds like Bella's doing, doesn't it? I wonder what she told Billy to get him to keep him busy. Where is she, anyway? Can you tell?" I asked him impatiently. Edward scrunched up his face in concentration before shaking his head.

"I can't tell. He is very difficult to read. I wonder if that's where Bella got it from. I'm mostly just seeing a few pictures and piecing it together with the few stray thoughts that I do manage to catch." He shook his head. "I'm not getting anything about Bella, though."

By this time, Charlie had already disappeared into the house. Maybe we should just go knock on the door and ask, I mused. Edward nodded in agreement. My phone beeped and I pulled it out to see a text from Alice.

_Forgetting something?_

I glanced at Edward. _Are_ we forgetting something? I silently asked him. He shrugged and glanced back down at my phone. On cue, it beeped again.

_Honestly. You two give me a headache. Come get the car first before you go bugging the man. Idiots. _

_~~~~~~~.~~~~~~_

"What can I do for you boys?" Chief Swan grumbled upon seeing us. We had just arrived back at the Swans, this time with Edward's car in tow.

"Is Bella home?" I asked quietly, keeping my head down and trying my best to seem meek. Edward chuckled quietly at my display.

"No," Charlie grunted, saying nothing more. Well okay then. Edward shook his head slightly; he still couldn't pick up where she was. Time to up the ante. I smiled at Charlie, pushing trust and warm fuzzies into him. He swayed a little, grabbing the door frame for support. Oops. I might have overdone it just a bit. He blinked and shook his head, before turning to me and grinning just a little. Gotcha.

"She went to Florida to visit her Mom for spring break. She'll be back on Saturday. She was considering taking an earlier flight when I..." he trailed off, scowling, as we both heard a fuck-awful yowling sound coming from the trees. "What the hell?" he muttered, taking a step out onto the porch.

I groaned as I saw a white furball launch itself across the porch. Faster than I thought possible, it was on me, climbing up my clothes and onto my shoulders. It was purring loudly now, rubbing itself against my head.

"What the fuck?" I muttered before I could stop myself. I detached the pussy from myself and gently set it down on the porch, only to have the fucking thing climb right back up me again. And I repeat, what the fuck?

Edward was full out laughing at this point, and Chief Swan was no better. Me, I was just trying to keep the kitten from rubbing its butt in my face. Amusement was flowing out of Charlie in waves, along with quite a bit of embarrassment and a little bit of guilt. I plucked the kitten from my shoulders once again, and awkwardly cradled it in my arms. What can I say, I'm a pussy magnet.

"I'm sorry," Charlie choked out, still trying to get his laughter under control. "I wondered where the little thing got off to." His guilt sky rocketed as he watched the kitten start its trek back up to my shoulders. It promptly started pawing at my hair. Lovely.

"It's yours?" Edward asked, finally deciding to contribute to the conversation. His emotions told me he was still chuckling on the inside. Asshole.

"I suppose. Someone left it in a box on the stairs of the library. I got the call right before I left the station Friday afternoon. I picked up some cat food and brought it here before I went on my fishing trip." He nodded to the other end of the porch, which had a big pot filled with enough cat food to feed an army. A cat army, that is.

"I figured Bella would like it," he mumbled quietly, his ears tinged pink with embarrassment. "She had a cat alarm clock, but it got broken somehow."

_Was my pussy not to your liking, Jasper?_

Oh. Fuck. Her words from that morning came rushing back to me, and I swear if I could've blushed, I would have been fucking cherry red. Edward made a choking noise, totally caught off guard by my thoughts, before he started chuckling quietly. Pussy, I told him in my head. And no, you're not to my liking.

Charlie was suspiciously glancing between us, so I quickly changed the subject. "Will you tell her that Jasper stopped by?"

"Yeah, sure. You want me to take that?" he asked, awkwardly gesturing to the pussy on my shoulders that had curled up and buried its face in my hair. I nodded, grabbing the kitten and chuckling as it growled at me for daring to disturb it. Yep, this was definitely a kitten worthy of Bella.

"Thanks," I said, smiling as I watched Charlie try to hold on to the squirming little furball. We made it to the car before Edward opened his mouth.

"Shut up," I told him, cutting off whatever remark he was going to make. My phone beeped and I looked down to see a text from Alice.

_Should I be jealous? I saw the pussy throwing itself at you ;)_

"Funny, Alice. Real damn funny," I muttered as Edward pulled out of the driveway, once again laughing at me. Asshole.

~~~~~~~~~~~~.~~~~~~~~~~~~

I smiled as I heard the familiar sounds of Bella's truck coming down the driveway. I jumped up and ran to the door, throwing it open and waiting impatiently for her to come into view. Emmett and Edward were beside me a fraction of a second later.

"I swear, it's like a trained circus around here. You all are worse than Pavlov's dogs," Rosalie snarked as she walked by us, shaking her head. We ignored her.

What seemed like an eternity later, Bella killed the truck and opened the door. I was down the stairs in a second, pulling her out of her truck and hugging her tight, surprising the both of us.

"Geez, miss me much Jazz?" Bella said dryly, but I could see the smile on her face and feel her emotions flowing around me. I smiled even wider. She missed me, too.

"I thought you weren't coming back until tomorrow," Rose said as we walked into the living room. I growled at her quietly, but Bella just smiled.

"I took an earlier flight just to see you, Rose. I just missed you so much, my little heart couldn't take being away from you any longer. It was killing me right here," Bella deadpanned, placing her hand over her heart.

"Bitch," Rosalie hissed, trying to hide her smile.

"Takes one to know one, sweetie," Bella laughed, shaking her head. "I feel like I'm back in 3rd grade again. Next I'll be pulling out the old 'I'm rubber and you're glue' analogy."

"How's your pussy?" Emmett burst out, not being able to hold it back any longer.

"Tight and underused. How's yours?" Bella asked, staring pointedly at Edward. I laughed. I simply couldn't help it, especially with the choking noises that the prude was making.

"Seriously, though," Bella chuckled. "The pussy is a bitch. I swear she fucking hates me. I put her in my room and the hussy squeezed herself into my underwear drawer, which I only left open like an inch, and clawed up most of my panties. Like I said, she's a bitch. I named her Rose."

She smiled smugly at the cat's namesake, who was currently torn between being flattered and insulted. Bella started talking again before she made up her mind.

"So I'm free for the entire weekend. Charlie left this morning to go fishing with Billy. Apparently, last weekend Billy caught more fish than he did, so he feels he has to prove to himself that it was just a fluke." She laughed then, nodding her head in agreement to something unheard by me. I warily sent her a small wave of curiosity and she glanced at me, cocking her head slightly to the side.

"It's like a dick measuring contest- fishing style," she murmured to me. Okay, then. I did ask. Moving on.

"Are you spending the weekend here, then?"

"I'm thinking about it. You would not believe how boring Florida was. I was dying for something, anything, interesting to happen. That's one thing that I will give you vampires-you are definitely anything but boring. You wanna go shopping, Alice? I need to pick up some things for the cat. Mainly a PDS."

Alice gleefully accepted, taking it for the peace offering that it was, and jetted upstairs to change her clothes.

"What is a PDS?" Edward, who had been mostly silent until now, asked.

"Pussy Detection System. I'm gonna bell that bitch. No more sneak attacks for her. I'm also going to buy her a dress. A really cute, frilly, little dress that will drive her crazy. No one claws up my panties without repercussions."

"You say it like it's happened before," Emmett laughed. His laugh was cut short, however, as we all heard a knock at the door. Rose flounced out of the room, and we all waited as we heard the door open.

"Come on in. Jasper's busy playing with the human," Rose said loudly as she walked back into the living room, quickly followed by my brother Peter. I had just enough time to wonder why he was here, before a magnitude of different emotions slammed into me and left me temporarily stunned speechless. And that is when the shit hit the fan.


	20. Chapter 20

**Peter's POV**

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I found myself lying on my back in the grass, wondering what the fuck had just happened. I sprung to my feet, only to fall back to my knees as wave after wave of sadness and agony crashed down upon me. I felt like someone was squeezing a vice around my chest, tighter and tighter it got, until I couldn't even breathe. Vampires aren't really required to breathe, I know this, I do. But somewhere between the fourth and fifth waves of agony, my infallible vampire brain forgot that trivial little fact.

I started to panic, desperately trying to draw air into my body. My chest felt like it had been ripped open, and I looked down expecting to see a raw, gaping wound. But there was nothing, nothing except for the pain that was eating me whole. I was positive that I would cease to exist any second now, for how could I live through this torment that was surely meant to kill me.

And then it stopped, just freaking stopped, leaving me face first in the dirt, panting for air. After a few disorienting moments, I understood what had happened. Fucking empath. I raised my head up, ignoring the way that the world around me seemed to spin. Damn, he had really done a number on me. After a few seconds, I decided that it was safe enough to jump to my feet. Big fucking mistake.

The very instant that I obtained an upright position, Jasper's hands wrapped themselves around my neck. I fell straight backwards, hitting the ground with a loud thud, Jasper straddling my chest, hands still squeezing my neck. I could hear Alice screaming for him to stop, but I noticed that no one tried to pull him off me.

"Why should I stop, Alice? I was only letting him feel what he caused Bella to feel. Did you know she was crying when she left? Why should I show any mercy to this sorry sack of shit?" he growled, squeezing even tighter. I felt like one of those damn keychain toys; you know, the ones that you squeeze and the eyes pop out. I wonder if a vampire could just pop those puppies back in. I damn sure didn't want to be the guinea pig that got to try that one out. I like my eyes in my head, thank you very much.

And what the fuck am I even thinking about losing my eyeballs for, anyway? Jasper's rough treatment of me must have flipped the 'stupid' switch in my brain on. Stupid on, stupid off. I wonder if there's a SPA, stupid people anonymous, I could join. But then technically I wasn't a 'people' so I would really need SVA. Stupid vampires wouldn't last long enough to form a group, though. Hmm, maybe I could...why was I even thinking about that? What the hell was wrong with me? Well, besides the empath sitting on my chest, I mean. Wait...empath. Fuck.

"Reign that shit in, Major," I choked out when Jasper loosened his grip on my neck. I felt the fog surrounding my mind recede. "What the fuck was that?"

"That was a nice little cocktail I picked up from Woodstock. You acted like you didn't have a damn brain earlier, so I let you feel what it's like for your brain to actually be fried. I could keep you in a stupefied state for eternity, Peter. It doesn't take that much effort on my part. I suggest you give me a good reason not to, and fast."

"Sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry, Major. I lost my gift a couple months ago, and I've been fucked up ever since. The human girl that was here was setting all my senses off, but I don't know why. She was fucking unnerving me and her eyes have haunted me for months. I hurt when I look at her, a real actual fucking ache, but at the same time I feel consumed by a vast emptiness," I confessed, talking faster with every word that spilled from my mouth. It felt good to tell Jasper. It felt right. I wanted to tell him everything...fucking empath.

"Go on," Jasper growled, completely removing his hands from my throat. He must have increased the 'tell-me' juju, because I couldn't keep my fucking mouth shut.

"I know her somehow, but I don't. I feel like I've lost something vital when I look into her eyes. And she was just fucking staring at me, her big brown eyes boring into me. I just wanted her to go, but I didn't feel any better when she left. And I hit a fucking tree and lost my gift. I made a tree angel, Jasper, because I'm a real vamp. And then that cunt Maria almost captured us, and Char thinks I'm depressed, so I come to the vampire doctor for help. And-"

"Dude, fuckin' stop," Emmett choked out around his laughter. "Jasper, cut that shit out for a minute so I can enjoy this. A tree angel, Peter?"

"Empath ass," I muttered, glaring at Jasper for effect. I was too fucking relieved to be pissed, though. There were quite a few things about me that I did not want the Cullen's to know, and Jaspers juju made my tongue loose as a fucking goose. It was bad enough that Emmett now knew about the tree.

"Don't think this is over," Jasper growled. "You are damn well going to apologize to Bella, and you better hope like hell that she accepts it or it'll be your ass. You have no idea what you've just done."

"Ain't that the fucking truth," I laughed bitterly. Jasper opened his mouth to reply, but was cut short by a thunderous boom, quickly followed by the ear-shattering screech of twisting metal. I heard Jasper yell for Carlisle, and then watched as they shot off towards what we both knew to be the scene of a wreck. But not before he snarled one last sentence at me.

"If she dies, you will too, and that's a fucking promise."


	21. Chapter 21

**Jasper's POV**

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As soon as I heard the bellowing noise, my mind threw up an image of Bella's tear-filled eyes as she ran out the door and to her truck. No. It wasn't her, it couldn't be her. Another image, this one of Bella driving with red, swollen eyes, tears restricting her pathetic human sight even more. I yelled for Carlisle and took off towards the sound, but not before yelling a warning to Peter.

"If she dies, you will too, and that's a fucking promise," I snarled, meaning every last word.

It seemed like forever before we arrived, even though in reality it was only a few minutes. I had tried to tell myself that there was a big possibility that it was Bella, tried to prepare myself for it. But nothing could have prepared me for the sight of her truck wrapped around the tree. Nothing could have prepared me for the sight of crimson covering her limp body, or seeing the large piece of glass from the windshield jetting out of her, imbedded deep within her stomach, pinning her to the seat.

I watched with a dulled horror as Carlisle gently examined her. My mind barely even registered the fact that her blood had no scent whatsoever. Carlisle looked up at me then, and I could tell from his grim look what his verdict was. He sighed and shook his head.

"She's not going to make it, son. There's too much internal damage, and she's lost too much blood. I'm sorry, Jasper, but there's nothing I can do," Carlisle said, and I could feel the truth of his words.

"I can change her," I said quietly, feeling my resolve grow as I uttered the words. I could save Bella. I would save Bella. All it would take is one little bite. I could do it. I had done it countless times before, when I was with Maria. I shoved Carlisle out of the way, and stared down at Bella, surprised to notice that she was conscious.

"No, Jasper. I don't want to be changed. There's no point, anymore. Take...care...of..Charlie," she wheezed, and then started coughing up more of her strange, scentless blood. My chest started throbbing as I watched her, the human who had become like a sister to me, slowly start to fade away. She had wormed her way into my undead heart, claiming a small piece of it for herself. And fuck it all, if I was just going to just stand here and let her die. She would forgive me, eventually. I would have all of eternity to make it up to her.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead, whispering a quiet, "Forgive me, darlin" before leaning over and touching my lips to her neck. This was it. I could do this. I parted my lips and prepared myself to bite.

"No!" Edward yelled, and launched himself at me. I had just enough time to maneuver so the fucker didn't knock me into Bella, before he was on me.

"He was going to change her anyway!" Edward shrieked to Carlisle, like the little bitch tattletale that he was. I dropped him with a wave of agony, and started back towards Bella, only to be tackled by Emmett and then Rose. My concentration was blown all to hell, causing me to lose my hold on Edward. He joined Emmett and Rose, who were trying in vain to hold me down.

I shoved them all off of me with a roar, punching Edward in the face for good measure. I once again started my trek forward, only to be stopped by the one person who I refused to hit or use my abilities on. My mate. I hesitated for a split second when she stepped in front of me, but it was long enough. Next thing I knew, I was being held down by Carlisle, Edward, Emmett, Rose, and yes, my mate and own personal kryptonite, Alice.

"I will never forgive you for this," I snarled, surprised to find that the words were true for every single one of them, my mate included. There were certain lines you didn't cross, and these people had stomped all over mine, laughing the entire time. I wouldn't forget.

"She doesn't want this, Jasper," Rose grunted. "I wish that someone would have given me the choice."

"You have the same choice right now, that you had all those years ago," I growled, sick of her selfish shit. "Die or live as a vampire, Rose. Same fucking choices. No one's stopping you from hurling yourself into a bonfire if you're so fucking unhappy. Hell, I'll even help you."

Thankfully, Rose didn't open her mouth again. Edward started in on some spiel about 'damned souls', so I tuned him out. I could hear Esme crying somewhere near us, but I tuned her out as well. I focused solely on Bella's heartbeat that was fading with every soft thud. I couldn't lose her, I just couldn't.

I renewed my fight to break free, sending out the strongest wave of agony I could muster. I was mentally exhausted, and needed to feed to regain my strength. Using my gift this strongly takes a lot out of me, and I simply didn't have the juice left to really affect them all strongly enough to incapacitate them. I was fucking stuck unless I was willing to unleash my beast and risk killing them all. Yes, I was fucking pissed at them, but I knew I would never forgive myself if I killed them all. I felt so damn helpless, and I did not like it, not one little bit.

"It's almost over," Carlisle murmured, as if that would fucking help me. I let out a feral roar, expressing my emotions in the only way left to me. When this was all over, someone was going to pay.


	22. Chapter 22

**Peter's POV**

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I stared in horror as the scene unfolded before me. Jasper's family had turned against him, not caring the least about his wants. He didn't want to lose the human girl. I knew she was very important to him for him to go against his mate. My heart clenched as I heard his agonized wail. This was my maker, my brother. I would do anything for him. If he wanted this little girl, he was damn well going to have her.

I zipped to her side and gently brushed the hair from her neck. She really was beautiful, this human. I was shocked when I noticed that her blood had no scent. Never in my years had I encountered this before. Something compelled me to lean down and place a gentle kiss on her forehead. It felt so...right. Being this close to her was screwing with my head. What was it about this human that made me feel such...conflicting emotions?

"Angel?" she murmured, surprising me when her eyes fluttered open. And there they were, those haunting brown eyes, staring at me once more. Was she that close to death that she believed me to be an angel?

"Shh...it's okay, kitten. Just rest your eyes. It will all be over soon," I cooed softly, carefully tilting her head to the side.

"I missed you so much," she sighed softly. I pulled back slightly and stared at her curiously. She must be delusional, I decided. I leaned back in and kissed the pulse point on her neck. It was way too slow. Her change would have to be soon.

"Are you going to make me like you now?" Her innocent little voice was barely a whisper.

"Yes," I replied, just seconds before I sunk my teeth into her lovely little neck. I took a long pull of her blood, and almost recoiled in shock. It was almost bitter, more venom-like in taste than blood. I quickly pumped my venom into her system, careful not to drink any more of her fowl-tasting blood. When I was finished, I slowly pulled my teeth from her skin and licked her neck to seal the wound.

"Thank you," I heard her murmur as I pulled away. I smiled down at her and was surprised by how peaceful she looked. The emptiness I had felt before was gone now that I was so close to her. I still felt like something was missing, but looking down into her serene face, I decided to worry about it later. Oh, what this human girl did to me.

About that time, Jaspers pained wail ended and silence descended around us. The Cullen's had all been so focused on keeping Jasper contained, that they didn't even recognize what I had done. Edward, of course, was the first to notice.

"Noooo!" he exclaimed loudly. "What have you done? You just sentenced her soul to eternal damnation!"

"What?" Jasper whispered, and that one word was filled with so much hope and longing that I knew I had made the right decision. He got up off the ground, the Cullen's no longer fighting him since, in their eyes, the worst had already happened, and sprinted over to me, looking down at the girl in wonder. I pondered what his connection to her was, and suddenly felt jealous and possessive. Jasper had a mate, already. He needed to leave this little girl alone. She was...mine? What the fuck. Jasper looked up at me and raised an eyebrow.

"She's like a sister to me," he said curtly, thankfully choosing not to comment on my emotional state. I relaxed instantly, only then noticing that I had even tensed up. And I repeat, what the fuck?

"I changed her for you," I said stupidly, as if he couldn't see it for himself. I changed her for Jasper, I told myself again. It had nothing at all to do with me. Yeah. Sure.

The Cullen's had gathered around us once again, and Edward was still bitching and moaning about the girl's 'damned' soul. I honestly felt like smacking Carlisle in the head at that moment. Why the hell would he do something so stupid as to change Edward? Meh. To each their own, and all that shit. Edward's sermon was cut off by the little girl's raspy whisper.

"Shut..up...Fuckward," she rasped. I laughed, I simply couldn't help myself. The girl didn't pray, didn't question her situation, didn't make a dying wish. No, she spent her last words as a human on telling Edward to shut up. That's my kinda girl, right there. She gave me a small smile and then she seemed to pass out, her body going limp and compliant.

"We need to extract the glass from her, and then take her to the house," Carlisle said.

And that is exactly what we did. Bella, as Jasper had ordered me to call her after the fifth time I called her 'little girl', was eerily silent through the whole ordeal. Not even a fucking peep. I was starting to worry that I had done it wrong, and I'm pretty sure I would have totally freaked the fuck out, if not for the way her wounds were sealing themselves up. By the time we reached the Cullen house, they were nothing but thick pink scars.

Jasper carried her limp body upstairs, me following like the lost puppy that I am. Alice and Rose made us leave the room while they washed the blood off of her and cleaned her up. We busted back into the room as soon as we heard them finish, and I worriedly examined her stomach again. Her scar had faded considerably, now only a thin whitish line. It would be totally healed soon, all evidence of the wreck gone from her body.

Even though I knew the venom was working, I still couldn't help feeling a little uneasy. She was just so damn still, so silent. How could she suffer that pain in silence? Hopefully I didn't wait too long to turn her. Hopefully she wouldn't wake to be totally brain damaged or some shit. The last thing we needed was a batshit crazy newborn runnin' around. I was driving myself crazy over all the possible things that could go wrong.

As my venom worked its way through her system, she seemed to also work her way through mine. It was strange, really. I'm not sure if it was simply because I knew that is was MY venom running through her veins, or if it was something else at work, but I began to crave her. My body yearned to hold her, touch her, just be close to her. And not just in a sexual way, either.

I had never turned anyone before, that was always Jasper's job, so I didn't know if these feelings were the norm or not. Jasper kept throwing glances at me, but never said a word about my strange emotions. Actually, he hadn't said a word to anybody but me since we'd gotten back from the wreck. Guess he wasn't too happy with his so called 'family' right now. Not that I blamed him. Hell, I'd told him years ago that the Cullen's weren't anything like we were. They wanted a tame, watered down version of him, and they would never accept him for who he actually was, faults and all.

But Jasper claimed to be happy here, so who was I to rain on his parade. He knew that I would always be there for him, never judging his choices or mistakes. It was always my door that he ended up at after one of his 'slip ups', red-eyed and all alone. It has always made me wonder what the whole Cullen family was good for, if they weren't willing to help their family members out when they needed it.

But that's just my opinion on things, and I've found my opinion doesn't count for much around here. Probably not at all, now that my gift is gone. Even without it, though, I felt I was missing something. And not just my gift, either. I felt like a part of me was gone, and the only time I felt better was when I stood beside the changing human.

So that's where I stayed, cemented to her side, even though I'm sure the Cullen's thought I was a creeper. Hell, if it would have been Edward doing it, I know I would have called him a creeper. They had all left for a hunting trip about an hour ago. They knew her change wouldn't end for a couple more days, and they wanted to be prepared and at full strength when she did awake. She would be a newborn, after all.

Jasper fought to stay here with me, but Alice, cunning little bitch that she is, pointed out the fact that we could most definitely use his gift when Bella woke up. Since he was pretty much completely drained, which he wouldn't have fucking been in the first place if it weren't for the Cullen's, he reluctantly agreed.

He told me that he was going to hunt locally, and that he'd only be gone a few hours or so. He also gave me a few...choice words, about what would happen to me if I let any harm come to the human. Alice just smiled smugly throughout all this, patiently waiting for Jasper to join her. Boy, was she in for a surprise, though, because Jasper took off in a totally different direction from her and everyone else. Apparently, the bitch didn't see it coming, and the shocked and confused look on her face was priceless. Made my fuckin' day, it did.

It had been almost 24 hours since I had filled this beautiful girl with my venom. Every second that ticked by, I felt myself becoming more and more attached to her. She was mine. Somehow I knew that she always had been. What the hell was wrong with me?

Apparently, something other than just that, because I could have sworn that I just heard her heartbeat stop. It did. Fuck. I started to panic. Her heart shouldn't have stopped yet. She still had two more days to go. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck! Jasper is going to enjoy rending me limb for limb and tossing my deserving ass in the fire. Son of a twice-dead vampire, how did this happen?

I was still panicking like a monk in a titty-bar, when it happened. Kitten sucked in a big breath of air, let it out slowly, and then opened her eyes. Bright crimson eyes met my own and I was lost. I felt my gift come back online, the voices in my head returning to me, but my eyes were locked with hers and I was helpless to look anywhere else.

"Incoming!" I heard the voices in my head screech, a second before I was knocked on my ass, folding under the weight of the memories that were burying me, threatening to consume me whole. I had one last second to gaze into her beautiful eyes, and then I saw no more.


	23. Chapter 23

**Peterpuss POV**

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I was running through the forest with my sister, Charlotte, and her mate, Garrett, when it happened. I stopped dead in my tracks, cocking my head to the side. My 'gift', aka the voices in my head, was telling me that I was going in the wrong direction. I needed to head towards...Washington? What the fuck did I need in Washington?

We were making our way towards Canada, returning to our favorite of the many houses that we owned throughout the country. It would be Garrett's first time there, seeing as how we'd only met him a month earlier. I lost a bet to Char in California and was forced to go on the San Francisco Vampire Tour with her.

Which is where we met Garrett. Quirky fucker was there voluntarily. For fun. That vamp ain't got the good sense God graced a flea with, that's for sure. Which is probably the reason that he ended up being Char's mate. Maybe the two of them together could change a light bulb.

Then again, maybe not, I thought as I watched Garrett bend over and pick up a heaping pile of animal crap. He abruptly turned and launched it at me, his face stretched out in a huge grin. I instantly dropped to the ground, tilting my head to watch the fecal matter fly over the top of me and then splatter onto a tree fifteen feet away. Does a bear shit in the woods? Yes. Yes, it does.

"Monkeys got nothin' on me! I can sling feces with the best of 'em," Garrett howled, laughing even louder as Char backed away from him due to the poo still covering his fingers.

"Eww. That's nasty!" Char shrieked, apparently not a fan of the slung dung.

"Aw, babe, I'll go wash up," he muttered, taking off towards the nearby stream. I found myself wishing he'd run into a fucking tree. If only that happened to vampires, I thought with a sigh. Now that would be some funny shit.

I shook my head, muttering curses as I jumped to my feet and brushed myself off. I looked up and found Charlotte watching me closely. Damn. She already knew something was up. I swear that woman has got some kind of spidey sense when it comes to me. Must be the twin thing.

"What's wrong, Peter?" she asked quietly, already looking concerned.

"Not a thing. I just have a few things that I have to take care of. I need you to go back to the cabin with Garrett, and I'll catch up with you in a week or so," I told her, already feeling the pull grow stronger. I really needed to get to Seattle. Right the fuck now.

"Bullshit," she spat with a glare, daring me to lie to her again. A split-second later, her anger was once again replaced by concern. She never could stay angry with me very long. "Where are you going? Can't we come with you?"

"No," I told her firmly, feeling the answer down to my core. They couldn't come. If they did, they would never return. I cringed, letting the knowledge wash over me. What the fuck was happening in Washington?

"But, Pet-"

"No," I said again, cutting her off. "It's something that I have to do alone, Char. I just know, okay?" I tapped my forehead, and she nodded in understanding.

"I'll miss you," she pouted. I smiled and gathered her into my arms, gently hugging her.

"I won't be gone long," I lied. I pressed a soft kiss on the top of her head and stepped back. "I'll miss you, too."

"At least I have Garrett to keep me company," she murmured. My mind threw up an image of Garrett trying to change a light bulb, starting an electrical fire, and burning the house down.

"Yeah. Just promise me you'll keep him away from the light bulbs," I said, only half-way kidding.

"What?" She busted out laughing.

"Never mind," I sighed. "I have to go. You better make sure he treats you right. Kick his ass if he doesn't. And for fuck's sake, don't let him burn our house down."

With a final hug and a few heartfelt words, I was gone. I found Garrett a few miles away, laying butt-ass naked in a shallow part of the stream. Once he covered his junk, because I really didn't need to see that shit, I told him that I was leaving for a while. I also reminded him what would happen if he hurt my sister, emotionally or physically.

When I left, the poor boy was still cupping himself protectively, more white-faced than usual. I heard Char's laughter and knew that she'd heard everything I told him. The idea of Garrett, her own mate, being junkless for eternity if he betrayed her, was funny to her. And they say I'm the cold-hearted one. Betray my sister, and she'll laugh while she rips your package off and burns it to ashes. My own junk was damn happy to have her on my side.

~~~~.~~~~

I made it to Seattle a day or so later. I followed the pull to a dingy, abandoned warehouse on the very outskirts of the city. The reek of rancid blood and decaying flesh hit me at almost the same time as the cloying mixture of overlapping vampire scents. An uneasy sensation traveled over my body, and I knew I had to be careful. I listened to the whispered commentary inside my head, my gift letting me know that I was closer to my past than I had ever wished to be again.

I had discovered the base of a newborn army. Memories that were better left buried tried to rise up, my time in Maria's army coming back to haunt me once again. I shoved them down, choosing instead to focus on the here and now. Memories couldn't kill me; the newborns residing in the warehouse in front of me easily could if I didn't pay enough attention.

I sniffed and sniffed, so much so that I'm sure I resembled a bloodhound, but I never did catch Maria's scent. This was nowhere near her territory, but times change, and for all I knew, she had moved to Washington. Anything was possible with that bitch. Expect the unexpected and all that.

So if it wasn't Maria, who could it be? For the love of perky tits, why was I even here? What was here that pertained to me in any way? I am a selfish creature, I'll admit. If it didn't directly involve me or my small group of family and friends, my gift usually left me the fuck alone.

I could feel myself being nudged closer, the danger of discovery increasing with every inch forward I moved. I could hear them talking now, all of them arguing amongst themselves. There were at least ten, no more than fifteen. _Twelve_, I was quickly informed.

There was one male that clearly seemed to be their leader. I briefly wondered if he was their creator, but quickly dismissed the thought when he started an argument over the blood type of a recent kill. There was simply no way he could have resisted draining the lot of them. _She is gone_~ flitted through my head, and I instantly stiffened. She. Their maker was female.

I waited a few minutes, but never received anything further. I did another quick sniff test, still not catching the faintest hint of Maria, before I decided to push that idea out of my head. Whoever their maker was, it wasn't Maria. I didn't know if that fact would work for me or against me. The devil you know and all...

The longer I listened, the more I realized just how new these newborns were. Most of them were only weeks old, the exception being the one who was in charge, and he couldn't have been older than a year. I could smell venom; hear the grating noises of two newborns going at it. These were feral, untrained vampires...and hungry at that.

I heard the older vampire call the babies to order, telling them they needed to pay special attention to what they were about to hear, and to the scent on the items he would soon be passing around. He informed them that they would soon be going after a human, a human girl to be specific. She was not to be killed, because she belonged to the Mistress. Whoever brought her to the Mistress would be greatly rewarded. They would be heading out in two nights time, and they needed to be able to recognize her scent.

I heard their growls of hunger right as her sweet scent reached my nose. And then I discovered the reason that I was here, the reason for my entire existence. Mate. My mate. The human they were discussing, the girl they were fixing to hunt...was my mate. Mine.


	24. Chapter 24

**Peter's POV**

.

"Mine!" my beast roared. They were threatening what was mine. I somehow managed to calm myself, pushing every thought that wasn't purely strategical out of my head. These newborns had to be destroyed pronto, and I had every intention of being the one to do it.

My mind started making and then dismissing strategies, taking only a few seconds to discern the best tactics. I couldn't quite keep my mind from drifting back to the newborn's plans for my mate. I could feel my beast rattling the cage I kept him in, struggling to break his way free and extract his revenge.

I was practically shaking in fury, my beast demanding that we destroy the threat to our mate. I shhshed him, murmuring quiet words of promise to him inside my head. _Just a little bit longer. The timing has to be perfect. We'll kill them all before the breaking dawn,_ I promised. Slowly I felt myself calming, once again assessing different scenarios.

As I slowly slipped off the premises of the nest, I had an errant thought that my mate had to be special, or I was fucked. After all, didn't humans usually lock up their own if they heard voices inside their head? Counting my 'gift', I was playing with a full house. What would my mate think of that? Would she cast judgment upon me? Would she welcome me with an open mind? What would she think of my scars? Would they disgust her? Could she love me even though I'm damaged?

One thing was for sure-I may never have the chance to find out if I didn't get my ass in gear. Once I was a safe enough distance away, I took off running full-speed towards Seattle. I didn't stop until I reached the seedy part of the city. Once there, it was easy to find a drug dealer to sate my thirst upon.

After I disposed of his body, I started my hunt once again. It wasn't long before I found my next victim. Even if I had been human, I still would have smelled him from a block away. He was sitting, passed out against a crumbling brick wall deep into an unlit alley. Track marks covered his arms, one of his hands still clutching the needle that I'm sure had added the latest set.

I bent down to pick him up, when my sensitive ears registered another sound. Another heartbeat. I quickly straightened and walked deeper into the alley, following the faint sound. I kicked the cardboard boxes and bags of garbage out of the way, finally revealing the source of the sound-and why it was so faint.

The emaciated body of a middle-aged female lay before me, dressed in nothing but an old shredded t-shirt. Her bones protruded out through her flesh in a sickly way, leaving nothing but a skeletal frame covered by thin, paper-like skin. Judging by her heartbeat, she wouldn't live more than a couple more days.

"Two for one special in alley five," I muttered, scooping up the wizened body and tossing her over my shoulder. I strolled back through the alley, stopping only to toss junkie number one over my other shoulder. He groaned quietly, too lost in his drug-induced stupor to realize what was happening.

With my passengers safely on board, I ran full speed back towards the old warehouse. I knew that I needed to have the element of surprise on my side. I took only a second to determine that there weren't any new scents, before I busted through the only window that wasn't broken or boarded up.

The sounds of shattering glass rang through the night, the smell of human blood hanging heavy in the air. But not quite heavy enough for what I needed. I crouched down and scooped up one of the jagged pieces of glass. I smiled as I heard the newborns' growls of hunger from the small amount of blood that had already been spilt. Well, small compared to what it was about to be, anyway.

I clutched the glass tightly, quickly drawing it bone-deep across each of the human's throats. I tossed them both towards the horde of newborns, already glancing around to identify the older male who was in charge. I spotted him quickly; he was the only one not fighting over the fresh blood. I pounced on him, promptly ripping his head off his body before ridding him of his appendages.

After that, I sat back and watched the chaos for a few minutes, picking off a couple newborns that had come out of their bloodlust. I had just finished disassembling a small male, when I was forced to hastily duck, narrowly avoiding the severed female's head that had been launched across the room. I straightened and glanced around, noting the many different extremities that now littered the floor.

There were only a handful of newborns left now, thanks to my picking them off and their fighting amongst themselves for the blood. I threw myself into the mass, quickly ridding two males of their heads. I felt the burning sting of venom on my arm and knew that I had been bitten. I looked down, surprised to see the petite dark-haired girl still attached to my arm. She was young, probably only fourteen or fifteen.

She released her grip and moved over an inch, planning on biting me again. I wrenched her up by her hair before her teeth could close on my arm again, and then mechanically dismembered her. There were only three males left now, but they were no longer distracted by bloodlust. Their eyes were all focused on me, watching my every move.

Two of them threw themselves at me, using no skill or strategy, only their brute strength. I side stepped them both and then launched myself at them, coming in from the side and moving swiftly. First one, and then both were down, leaving only me and one other standing. He was a stocky one, big and built. He vaguely reminded me of another stout vampire I knew.

His eyes darted frantically about, taking in the still twitching limbs and heads that littered the floor like a big jumbled puzzle. How many licks would it take to reassemble them-the world may never know. I snorted, finding my own dark humor funny. The remaining vamp cast me one more wary glance, before turning around and scrambling towards the door.

I had anticipated this, of course, and had already decided that I could leave no survivors. Not with my mate's life at stake. I swooped up a head that was lying near my feet, and hurled it at him as hard as I could. My impromptu weapon of choice struck him in the head, causing him to lose his balance and fall face-first onto the concrete floor.

I was on him in a flash, my teeth at his neck helping to rid him of his head. I had just started on his arms when I noticed a shift in the air. I felt teeth bury themselves in my neck, a split-second after I sensed her.

As my head was ripped from my body, I vaguely registered hearing my voices say, "_Their maker has arrived!"_. Yeah. No shit.

"Who the hell are you?" she yelled as she set my head down on the dirty concrete floor beside my body. She made quick work of removing my limbs, savagely ripping them from my torso.

"Are you another Cullen that I haven't met yet? What is it about this human that makes her so damned special anyway? Between you and those _mutts_," she snarled here, turning her nose up in disgust, "I'll never get my revenge."

She studied me closely, her face set in a scowl. "You came in here and destroyed everything that I have worked months to build. My whole army-gone. Wouldn't do me any good to piece them back together if one lone vampire can destroy them in a matter of minutes, now would it? Those mutts would probably laugh at me."

I snarled at her, although it wasn't nearly as effective since it was silent. For some reason, vampires can't talk if their heads are severed. I don't know if it's due to not being connected to the vocal chords anymore, or what. All I know is that it's the truth, plain and simple. I just became a mute.

"I suppose I should thank you," she said suddenly, looking contemplative. "You have just given me a wonderful new tactic. Distraction. It was the only way that I was able to defeat you so easily. Maybe all it will take is a good distraction to get the wolves off my trail. To get to my prize."

I stared in horror, realizing that I would be unable to protect my mate against this monster. I had to warn her somehow. She couldn't die. I hadn't even gotten to meet her yet. She was _MY_ mate, dammit. I had finally found her, and we were supposed to spend eternity all happily ever after and shit. Why would my so called 'gift' lead me here, only for me to die knowing that my mate was fixing to die as well?

"Yes. Yes, I believe that will work quite nicely," the red-headed bitch murmured. "All I have to do is find some idiot older vampire and sucker them into being my cannon fodder. But first, I should clean up my mess here."

She laughed as she grabbed a container of gasoline that was conveniently tucked into a corner. Guess she wasn't one for idle threats. She grabbed up the scattered newborn extremities, and made a loose circle surrounding me. She doused them all in gasoline, before closing the distance and pouring some on me as well. She then stepped outside the circle and pulled a book of matches from her back pocket.

"This way, you'll be able to see it coming, be able to watch as the flames lick closer and closer until they finally devour you." She started cackling then, loud and long. And then the bitch struck a match against the book, igniting the flame. She was still laughing when she tossed it down and ran, fleeing the warehouse. Venom and gasoline erupted, flames igniting everywhere. I could see the terrified faces of the few newborns that weren't immediately engulfed by the inferno. I cringed in sympathy as one by one, they were consumed.

Purple smoke started to fill the warehouse, making it harder to see by the second, even for my eyes. I wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse, as I felt the first tickle of heat touch one of my scattered limbs. Now even if I couldn't talk, I could still feel the rest of my body, which meant that I felt the agony of every single limb as it burned. When nothing but ash remained, the pain would suddenly stop, leaving me feeling the numb emptiness of loss.

My torso burning hurt even worse. I found myself wishing for death as I felt the flames consuming me whole. It hurt, sweet mother, did it hurt. My mouth was wide open in a silent scream when the flames ignited my hair, intensifying what had already been the worst pain of my life. Even the change had nothing on being literally burned alive.

As the flames fully engulfed my head, I felt a part of myself, the part of my mind that held my gift, pull away. My consciousness followed, seemingly tethered to my gift. My gift was a part of me, therefore I should go where it goes. That is how I found myself floating, staring down at my own body, watching in stunned silence as it slowly turned to ash.


	25. Chapter 25

**Peter's POV**

.

Now I have never believed in actual ghosts, even though the different voices in my head gave me plenty of reason to. I mean, yes, I will admit that I have considered their existence. When you have a multitude of voices inside your head, male and female alike, who all have different personalities, it's only natural to think of things like ghosts occasionally.

Not that I ever considered myself a ghost whisperer or anything. No, I have always tried to avoid thinking about them, calling them my 'gift' and leaving it at that, chocking the rest of it up as being my own unique brand of crazy. Who knows, maybe I was a schizo when I was human or some shit. Besides, technically the ghosts are the ones who whisper to me, not vice versa.

But as I drifted from the warehouse, I had to admit that I wouldn't dare try to deny their existence now. My own personal ghosts were still with me, but I couldn't understand the voices because they were so quiet. I guess I had exhausted my 'gift' and it would be a while before it was up and running, or in this case up and speaking, again. Hopefully. I couldn't even fathom the idea that I would never be able to hear them again. The voices were a part of me, kind of like a spouse would be to a human. For better or worse, til death do us part and all that good shit. Only in my case, even death didn't make us part.

I think I floated for a while, not really sure what to do or how to do it. I simply took the time I needed to adjust to my new existence. My gift came back to me all at once, the voices screaming at me that I had to hurry, had to get to my mate. I had to help her, to warn her. But I didn't know where I was or how to move. Before the thought had even completely formed, my voices had already started instructing me.

By the time I made it to Forks, my mate was already in the forest conversing with the enemy. _Isabella_, was whispered to me as I stared at the gorgeous girl I was currently hovering over. She was stunning, a little on the thin side, but still beautiful. Her dark brown hair and chocolate brown eyes were striking in contrast to her skin, which was pale enough to resemble my own...well, when I had skin, that is.

I was in awe. This little human girl was my mate. Mine. Fuck, how I loved the sound of it. I reluctantly pulled my eyes from her and examined the current threat against her. This must be the 'idiot older vampire' that the red-headed bitch planned to use as cannon fodder. He was fairly muscular, with dark skin and hair. He was also standing way too fucking close to my mate for my likings. Of course, if he was on the other side of the state, it would still be too fucking close in my eyes.

"I'm surprised they left you behind. Weren't you sort of a pet of theirs?" I growled loudly at him calling my mate a pet, but neither of them seemed to hear me.

"Something like that," her beautiful voice answered.

"Hmm," he said, a contemplating look on his face. My little one seemed to realize the danger that she was in, finally taking a step back. Not that it would do any good. I growled again, but to no avail.

"Do they visit often?" The dark-skinned vampire shifted closer to her with his question. I knew I had to help her stall until the wolves could arrive, I just didn't know how I was supposed to help if she couldn't even hear me._ Focus your energy, talk only to her. _I promptly did as I was told.

"Lie," I said, concentrating on pushing my energy into the word. She seemed to pause, eyes darting around before focusing back on the male vampire. And then she did it, she lied. Too bad she was such a shitty liar. Even a human wouldn't have believed her words.

"You must lie better than that, kitten. Stall, just a little while longer," I pleaded, using more of my energy to push the sentence to her. She tried, I'll give her that, but it still wasn't enough. My little one could not lie for shit, that's for sure. I would definitely have to teach her to play strip poker some time. I growled as I saw the vampire take another step towards my mate.

"Stall, kitten, just a few moments longer and they'll be here. Please, stall, little one," I begged, not even caring that she could probably hear the panic in my voice. And she listened, of course she did. She stalled by asking about the red-headed bitch, Victoria. When that didn't work, she begged. But it did no good. He took another step towards my mate and I could feel my rage rising up. _The wolves are here. _

"Run. Isabella, run. RIGHT NOW!" I yelled, pushing the last of my energy into the command. Thankfully, she listened. She turned and ran, the dark-skinned vampire laughing as she did. I smiled as I watched the wolves descend, smiled as I heard the growls that silenced the males laughter. And then I laughed as he was torn apart, my beast rejoicing just as much as I was.

After the smoke turned purple and I was sure the vampire was truly gone for good, I started off towards my mate. I felt drained, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to speak to her again until my energy built back up. Still, I wanted to see her, to know that she was safe.

Due to her slow human speed, she was just getting into her truck when I floated by. I followed her to what I assumed was her house. Even in my current form, I still had my sense of smell. I could smell the blood from my position in the back of her truck, smell it even over my mate's glorious scent. I tried to warn her, tried to stop her from going in the house. But I had exhausted every last morsel of energy I had when I talked to her earlier. I was useless. I could only watch.

So that is what I did. I watched. I watched uselessly as she opened the door, watched as she paused and took in the scene. I simply watched as she fell to her knees, screams pouring from her human throat until she could scream no more. My mate was hurting and I couldn't even offer her comfort. All I could do was bear witness.

My heart broke when she placed the gun inside her mouth. I screamed and yelled, but it did no good. Everything that I had given to try and save her was useless as she stood there, finger on the trigger. I turned away; I simply couldn't watch my mate end her own existence.

But then she was running towards the kitchen, gun forgotten on the floor. I floated after her, reading over her shoulder the note that Victoria had left her. The bitch had the nerve to tell my mate that she had gotten this idea from me. It pissed me off, and I felt the rage starting to build within me. It quickly deflated, though, when I heard the phone call my mate made.

I tried to beg, to plead, to growl and curse at her, anything to make her stay, to go to the wolves for protection. But it did no good. I was weaker than a newborn kitten and had no energy to push my words to her. I could do nothing but watch as my mate walked to her truck, leaving a trail of bloody footprints in her wake.

I followed her truck and witnessed it all; the red-haired bitch jumping on her hood, her old truck going through a guard rail and plunging down towards the water, Victoria grabbing my mate's limp body and pulling her out. Then she was running with her, taking her to a brick house out in the country. I followed her down into the basement and discovered what I'm sure were the owners of the house...plus a lot of other dead humans. They were all long dead, their stench burning my nose.

I was forced to watch as Victoria sunk her teeth into my mate's arm, letting her venom spread through her fragile system. My mate's screams rang out, her pleas for the red-headed bitch to end it all nearly breaking me. And then the bitch was sucking the venom back out, keeping my mate from changing. She was simply using it to torment her, I realized.

I watched in horror as the bitch tortured my mate, my Bella. I heard her bones snap, her screams ringing through the basement. And then the bitch uncovered my mate's mother and a different kind of torture began.

If I could have cried, tears would have been running down my face. Instead, I could only express my sorrow through the sobs that were racking my entire body. Never in my existence, human or vampire, have I completely broken down. But right then, watching my mate's pitiful attempts to crawl to her dying mother, I completely lost my shit.

When it was over, Renee's lifeless body added to the decaying pile, Victoria turned her attention back to Bella.

"Well, that was fun," the bitch laughed, walking over and kicking my mate in the stomach. Blood flew from her lips as she coughed and gagged. Her eyes rolled back in her head, and her body went limp. My strong mate had finally had enough, passing out to retreat into the blackness. Victoria gave one more cackle before she turned and walked back up the stairs into the main part of the home.

I crouched down by my Bella, trying to offer what comfort I could by running my transparent hand down her cheek. How could I watch this horror for another nine days? Surely, there was some way I could help her. Maybe I could find a physic or medium or some shit. Humans had those, didn't they? They had them in movies, anyway. Would Jasper's mate be considered close enough to a physic that she could see me? She'd never mentioned seeing ghosts before, but then I'd never mentioned that my 'gift' was actually a few voices inside my head. No, even vampires didn't advertise shit like that.

Just when I had decided to seek out Alice, my own voices deemed it necessary to intervene. _Slip into her dreams._ Well, hell, I thought. Just how do I go about doing that? _Slip into her, slip into her dreams._ I waited, but that seemed to be all I was going to get.

Okay. Slip into her. Surely, they didn't mean that in the sense that my lower extremity was hoping for. Well, now I knew that ghosts could, in fact, get a hard on. I chuckled for a second, but quickly stopped when I looked down at my damaged mate again. This was no time for laughter, even if it was keeping me from losing my shit again.

_Just drift into her body and you'll slip into her consciousness, her dreamscape. _The whisper was male, a grumpy voice who I rarely ever heard from. And when I did hear from him, he was usually not very helpful. _Fucking idiot! _Yep, now all is right with the world. Well, besides me being a ghost, and my mate being tortured in front of me. Okay, so maybe everything wasn't so peachy keen, after all.

I took a deep, really un-fucking-necessary breath, and slid my non-corporeal being into my lovely mate's body. Blinding white light flashed behind my eyes, and it felt like a bolt of lightning slammed through my body. And then everything was different.

No longer did I see the dingy basement with its huge pile of bodies. Nor did I see my mate broken and bleeding on the filthy concrete floor. No, what I was now looking at was a...puke green couch? What. The. Fuck.


	26. Chapter 26

_But through my tears breaks a blinding light  
Birthing a dawn to this endless night  
Arms outstretched, awaiting me  
An open embrace upon a bleeding tree_

_._

_Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
I have lived and I died for you  
Abide in me and I vow to you  
I will never forsake you_  
_._

_**~~Previously~~**_

_**.**_

_Just drift into her body and you'll slip into her consciousness, her dreamscape._ The whisper was male, a grumpy voice who I rarely ever heard from. And when I did hear from him, he was usually not very helpful. _Fucking idiot!_ Yep, now all is right with the world. Well, besides me being a ghost, and my mate being tortured in front of me. Okay, so maybe everything wasn't so peachy keen, after all.

I took a deep, really un-fucking-necessary breath, and slid my non-corporeal being into my lovely mate's body. Blinding white light flashed behind my eyes, and it felt like a bolt of lightning slammed through my body. And then everything was different.

No longer did I see the dingy basement with its huge pile of bodies. Nor did I see my mate broken and bleeding on the filthy concrete floor. No, what I was now looking at was a...puke green couch? What. The. Fuck.

~~~.~~~.

**Peterpire POV**

.

I was standing by a door in a small white room that, I'll admit, was just cliché enough to seem...expected, somehow. What I was not expecting, was the huge puke green couch that was sitting dead center in the room. Why the fuck would anyone choose that awful color of vomit green? If my mate somehow intentionally chose it, then I would definitely be picking out the furniture from now on. Well, that is if they even _have_ furniture where I end up going.

I glanced down at my hands, surprised to find that they weren't transparent anymore. After a quick inspection, I found that I had somehow reverted back to my vampire self while I was in this strange 'dreamscape'. Or maybe I just appeared this way because this was how I still perceived myself inside my head. Still haven't quite gotten use to the whole transparent thing. Satisfied with that explanation, I turned my attention back to checking out the room.

I noticed the other door on the opposite wall of the room, at about the same time that it opened. My mate poked her beautiful head in and glanced around, stopping abruptly when her eyes fell upon me. She cocked her head to the side, her curiosity plainly written on her face. She scrunched up her nose and pulled her plump bottom lip into her sexy little mouth.

"Is this heaven?" she asked, giving me a small smile. "If so, they seriously need to consider hiring an interior decorator." I busted out laughing, and even I wasn't sure if I was laughing more about her assumption that heaven would accept me, or at the fact that we both hated the couch.

"No, kitten, this is definitely not heaven," I told her, still chuckling softly. She gave me a full smile and took one small step into the room, quickly followed by another.

"I know you..." she said quietly, licking her lips as she scrutinized me. "You were in the forest with me and Laurent. You called me kitten then, too. And you told me to run."

"Yes, I did. Apparently you ran the wrong way," I said quietly. She stared at me for a minute, before turning her head away.

"I had no other choice," she replied, eyes on the thick white carpet. I started walking towards the green monstrosity in the center of the room, being careful to take slow, deliberate steps. Once there I eased myself down on the very end, smiling as my ass sank into the cushions. I glanced over at Bella to find her intently watching me.

"It's very comfortable," I said softly, suddenly feeling shy around this woman who so clearly already held my heart. What did she think of me? Could she see my scars? I quickly smoothed my hair down, making sure it covered the scar over my left eye.

"Is it now?" she murmured as she walked toward me, looking amused, no hesitation in her steps now. She ungracefully plopped down on the other end, immediately tucking her bare feet underneath her. She closed her eyes and sighed, sinking back into the cushions with a look of contentment on her face.

She opened her eyes and started to examine me once more. I wanted to make a smart-ass remark, maybe ask her if she liked what she saw, but I couldn't. I was so nervous that she wouldn't like me. It was a new feeling for me, self-doubt. After a few moments, I ducked my head and started fidgeting.

"Where are we?" she finally asked. I looked up to find her smiling at me, a light blush on her cheeks.

"In your dreams," I answered. She scowled at me and made a 'give me more' gesture with her hand. "It's more of a dreamscape, really. It's a place your mind conjured up to help you deal with...everything, as well as a place where I could be with you, talk to you. That's what I think, anyway."

"Hmm," she said softly. "And just why would you want to be with me, or even talk to me for that matter? How can you even be here? Is dream-walking your gift or something? And why couldn't I see you in the woods earlier? I heard your voice, but I couldn't see you."

"Because I'm dead," I whispered. "Because I'm a ghost, little one, and that's why you couldn't see me. You only heard me because I used every single molecule of energy I possessed to push the words to you. And, no, my gift is not dream-walking, although that would be pretty awesome. Freaky, but awesome."

"A ghost?" she mumbled. "Is that the best my imagination could come up with?"

"What?" I asked, shocked. She didn't believe me.

"Oh, nothing," she said, waving her hands in dismissal. I had the feeling that she was humoring me. "Even if you are a...ghost, that doesn't explain why you want to spend time with me. Unless I'm like your charge, or something."

"You're my mate, kitten. I knew it the first time I caught your scent. I'm Peter, by the way." Now she was really looking skeptical. Maybe I shouldn't have dropped the m-word so soon.

"I'm _your_ mate? Oh, this just keeps getting better and better. Next you'll say you died defending my honor or some shit." She stopped talking when she saw the look on my face. Her joke hit a little too close to home.

"W-what is that look for? How did you die, Peter?" She cautiously inched toward me, tentatively reaching her hand out for mine. I smiled at her as I gently grasped her fingers. Instantly, I felt the connection between us zing to life. It wasn't a jolt or shock, not anything like the shit you read about in romance novels...not that I read romance novels.

No, it was more a feeling of comfort; a soothing, safe feeling that seemed to wash over us in waves. My mate's body relaxed instantly and she didn't protest at all when I pulled her closer to me and wrapped my arms around her. We simply sat there for a time, holding each other, letting the waves of comfort wash over us and sooth our hurts. Bella was the first to break the silence.

"What is this...connection between us? I've never felt anything like it before. Why do I feel like I've known you forever? Why do I feel so safe...so loved?" she whispered. I tightened my grip on her, drawing her even closer to me.

"You're my mate," I told her simply. "You are loved."

"But it never felt this way with...E-Edward," she whispered, stiffening slightly as she glanced up at me, waiting for my reaction.

"That prissy pusspire was never your mate, kitten. And the next time I see him, I'm gonna make him pay." I picked up her arm and gently rubbed the two bite marks on it. "He will pay for every single mark, little one."

"But, he didn't do this to me. It's not his fault," she said quietly. My beast roared in anger, and it took a few moments for me to calm myself. She was defending him!

"I'm pretty fucking sure that it is his fault. He brought you into this world, Bella. And then for whatever reason, he left you alone to face the consequences. I may not know the whole story yet, but I know enough to know that Edward Cullen is not innocent," I growled.

"This isn't his fault," she repeated weakly, her resolve already faltering. I smiled, my anger dissipating. Somewhere inside that head of hers, she had already placed some of the blame upon ol' Eddie-boy.

"Tell me what happened then, little one. Tell me and leave nothing out," I challenged. Would she do it? Would she share her past with me? She thought about it for only a moment before she nodded.

"Alright. I will tell you everything and leave nothing out." I grinned, loving the fact that she was already starting to trust me. She held up a finger to stop my inner celebration, and then grinned back at me. "One condition."

"Anything," I promised, wondering what her condition would be. It didn't matter; I would never deny her anything that was in my power to give.

"You have to tell me about yourself...including how you died." She suddenly shook her head and chuckled. "I can _not_ believe that those words just came out of my mouth. So what are you, like a ghostpire or something? My mate is a ghostpire. Fuuck. My imagination is hard at work today, isn't it?"

"I've already told you, I'm not a figment of your imagination." I sighed, wondering if she would ever truly believe me. I decided to try and lighten the mood some. "And I bet I'm the sexiest ghostpire you've ever met."

"Yeah, if only because you're the _only_ ghostpire I've ever met," she said, laughing. I knew she was joking, really I did. Still, I smoothed my hair down over my forehead, desperately wishing that I could be better for my mate. She deserved someone better than a damaged fuck up like me. Hell, I had even managed to get myself killed. What kind of mate was I, if I couldn't even keep myself alive?

"I'm only kidding, Peter," she said softly. She looked down at her hands and I noticed that she was blushing furiously. "In fact, I would have to agree with you. You _are_ the sexiest vampire I've ever met, even if you are dead."

"Technically, all vampires are dead, kitten," I chuckled, feeling a lot better now. What was it about this woman that made me feel so insecure? Maybe it was just the mate thing.

"You know what I meant," she mumbled, blushing even more. "I guess I should have said twice-dead."

"Twice-dead, huh?" I laughed, liking the sound of it. Morbid humor at its best, I suppose. "Yeah, let's go with that."

~~.~~

The next few days were bittersweet, filled with contradictory emotions. During my mate's conscious hours, I was filled with pain and despair. I was forced to watch the red-headed bitch torture Bella mercilessly, biting her time and time again and then sucking the venom back out before she could change.

During my mate's unconscious hours, however, I was ecstatic. We grew closer with every passing day, both of us sharing our life stories with one another. I had learned all about my mate's history with the Cullen's, including how my maker had almost ended her life at the fateful birthday party. Fucker needed a good ass kicking for being a dumb-ass and chomping on bunnies and shit instead of feeding as vampires are intended to. There's a reason that vampires shouldn't munch on bambi, and Jasper's loss of control is a prime example of that.

Also, what the hell was the fucker thinking, leaving the nomad's mate alive? I would expect that shit out of pansy-ass Edward, but out of the freaking Major? No. That shit just isn't kosher. Poor fucker must have lost his mind as well as his balls when he met the all-knowing fashion gnome. She sees all, knows all, and tells all-as long as it suits her own fucking needs.

She wasn't the only one who shared her past pain. I opened up and told her all about my past, saving the red-headed bitch's involvement in my death for last. My mate sat in my lap the entire time, crying throughout most of my story. She fucking wailed when she learned that she really was inadvertently the cause of my death. Not that I would ever fucking admit that to her.

When I was finished with my tale, ending with how I had come to be in her dreams, she simply snugged into my chest and told me that I wasn't really a ghostpire. Of course I was curious about what the fuck else she thought I could be, so I asked her.

"You're a guardian angel, Peter. _My_ guardian angel. My Angel." I felt myself fall in love with her even more in that moment, even if I did have the errant thought that my mate was truly fucked by the Fate's if she had been assigned a vampire as a guardian angel.

As lovely as it was, talking wasn't the only thing that we did when we were together. I had been informed by my voices that my mate was a shield and that every single drop of venom that was entering her system was strengthening her shield. Using my gift, I helped teach my mate how to sense her shield, and then how to strengthen and weaken it.

I had unrealistic hopes that maybe she could somehow construct a physical shield and keep the red-headed bitch away from her. I knew it was stupid, but I refused to believe that I could do nothing but watch as my mate was killed. Yes, I was aware that I was deluding myself, but even a weak hope was better than just giving up and resigning myself to watch her die.

Time passed, as it always does, and suddenly it was the day before 'd-day'. Kitten was stretched out on the couch, her feet in my lap as I gently massaged them. She opened first one eye, then the other, and unabashedly studied me, seeming to take stock of my each and every feature. Well, above the waist, that is. It's a damned good thing that her eyes didn't fall any lower, or she'd have gotten quite an eyeful. It's not my fault that I pitched a tent with the way she was blatantly eye-fucking me.

I shifted her feet over a few inches, thankful that she hadn't seemed to notice my eagerness. She glanced down at herself, scrunching her cute little nose up in displeasure. Not for the first time, I found myself wondering what the hell she was thinking. What caused her obvious look of distress? Had she noticed my pocket rocket? Did she think I was a total pervert now? Obviously, she must. What kind of mate am I, to get a stiffy during a time like this?

I was still berating myself when she shifted, slowly sitting up and pushing my hair off my face. I ducked my head, not wanting to see the look of disgust that I'm sure was in her eyes. And then she giggled. It was such a joyous, wonderful sound that I couldn't help but grin. I lifted my head and my eyes met hers. And then she leaned in and kissed me.

It was nothing but a soft touch of lips, but I swear it made my twice-dead heart beat again. There was no way that I could contain the smile that I'm sure stretched across my whole face. My mate kissed me! If she kissed me, then obviously she didn't think I was a total deviant.

My smile was short-lived, however, as I caught sight of the new group of scars on my mate's arm. That bitch _would_ pay. Somehow, someday, she would pay. They all would. Bella snuggled up against me, asking me to tell her about my past once again. I was too preoccupied tracing her new scars to oblige.

"Stop it," she whispered softly, bringing her fingers to the corner of my mouth. She pushed upwards, and I couldn't help but to smile for her. I would do anything for her, my beautiful mate.

I once again mentioned my hopes for her shield to manifest physically, but I could tell by the expression on her lovely face that she knew just as well as I did, how very unlikely it was. Once again I found myself wondering why I had been brought here if I could do nothing but watch her die. Not that I would trade this time for anything, my own life included. My mate was worth that, and much more.

I gave in to her pleas, kissing her nose and securely wrapping her in my arms as I began a tale of both pain and joy. Sitting here, my lovely mate enveloped in my hold, I found that I could regret nothing of my past, for it had brought me here to this exquisite woman. My woman. My mate. My Bella.

It wasn't very long after I finished my story, that Bella started to fade slightly. This was typical and simply meant that she was starting to regain consciousness. I steeled my nerves, gave her my best cocky grin, and really planted one on her.

I kissed her, letting her feel all the passion and frustration, hopelessness and despair, all the emotions that were bottled up inside me. She hesitated slightly for only a second, before throwing herself into the kiss, giving as good as she got. I pulled her onto my lap, and there was no way that she could've missed my hardness this time.

I threaded my fingers through her hair, tilting her head slightly to get a better angle. I ran my tongue lightly across her delicate lips, moaning when she granted me entrance to her mouth. I slipped my tongue inside her, and for the first time I tasted my mate. She was simply delectable, the sweetest of all ambrosia.

I couldn't help the thrust of my hips, almost as if they had a mind of their own. And then I heard the most beautiful sound in the world, one that I would never tire of hearing; my mate's moan of pleasure. I groaned loudly, purposefully thrusting my hips again, and was delighted when my kitten rewarded me with another soft noise of pleasure.

I pulled back slightly, aware that Bella was gasping and breathless. I rained kisses down her cheek and neck as I murmured over and over how much I loved her. Not able to stay away from her luscious lips any longer, I grasped her face in my hands and gently pulled her mouth toward mine.

I leaned in, ready to taste her once again, when she simply faded out, a look of frustration on her gorgeous face. My hands held nothing but empty air now, so I let them fall to my lap as I prepared myself to thrown out of Bella's mind when she gained full consciousness.

Seconds later, it happened, and I was once again a ghostpire. I struggled to re-orient my mind, forcing myself to stare down at the broken body that belonged to my mate. I let out a ferocious growl, unable to keep it contained even though I knew that no one could hear me.

Kitten's fingers twitched and she opened her eyes slightly. I swear she stared straight at me. Could she see me? Her lips curved up into the smallest of smiles, and I knew that she could. While I was happy that I could now be a comfort to her even in her waking hours, I was also seriously worried about what this meant.

All of my excess energy was always zapped from me when I visited Bella in her dreamscape, so I knew that there was no way I could have pushed energy into my growl. And while, yes, she had been able to hear me speak before, she'd never been able to see me in ghost form. Could she see me because our connection had grown so much? Or was she just that close to death? Sadly, I knew in my heart that it was the second one.

I had been focusing so much attention on my mate that I hadn't even noticed that the red-headed bitch had entered the room. Kitten did, though, judging by the quickening of her heartbeat. I growled again, low in my throat, and then smiled as my mate's eyes once again focused on me. I willed myself to her, floating down until I was leaning over her in a protective crouch. I ran my fingers over her cheek, and was surprised when she felt solid to me. She let out a small sigh as she tried to force her battered body to lean into my touch.

"Oh, look, it's after midnight. Time for the big finale, wouldn't you agree? I have to admit that I started to tire of this game when you screamed yourself hoarse. What fun is it if I can't hear your pain? Just watching you squirm isn't nearly as pleasurable." She laughed then, long and loud, and I could see the almost-frantic expression on Bella's face morph into one of acceptance and relief. She was just ready for it to be over.

"Shhh. Look at me, baby girl. Keep your eyes on mine," I said forcefully, once again bringing her gaze back upon me. "No matter what, kitten, don't take your eyes off me."

And she listened, of course she did. Her eyes watched mine as Victoria picked her up and pulled her matted hair from her neck. My mate focused solely on me as her tormentor's teeth savagely ripped into her neck. Her arm seemed to twitch, and I somehow knew that she was trying to reach out to me, but couldn't due to her broken bones.

I pressed myself against her, trying to control the wrenching sobs that were threatening to tear me to shreds. She smiled at me then, just a small twitch of her lips but I knew what she meant. And then she looked directly into my eyes as she rasped out the three little words that completely shredded my control and tore me apart.

"_Love you, Angel."_

I should have been strong for my mate, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop the wail of agony that left my throat as I watched her life being literally drained out of her. Her eyes closed and she slumped, losing consciousness. All I could do was wrap myself around her and sob. My mate. My love. Gone. All hope was lost. And then I heard the voice.

"Would you give up everything that you are, for her?"

"Yes," I answered instantly, feeling the truth of it down to my core. Anything that I could give, I would. Anything. Everything.

"So be it."

And then I was running through the forest with my sister and her mate, when I ran smack dab into a tree.

_~~.~~_

My memories shifted then and I grimaced as my mate's green couch came into view. Somehow I knew that I had not seen this before, that it wasn't truly a memory for me. I was simply a silent spectator, watching a scene unfold as if on television. Bella appeared on the sofa, franticly looking around the room. I was sure she was looking for me, and it broke my heart that I couldn't comfort her, that she didn't know I was here, watching.

"You have been granted one wish, child. Choose carefully." The voice seemed to fill the room, bouncing off the walls and echoing slightly. It was the same female voice that I had heard, and I couldn't help thinking that it sounded familiar, but I knew that I could never have heard an angel's voice before. I dismissed the absurd thought, and focused my attention back on my mate.

"W-what do you mean? Are you an angel? Am I dead? Because if I am, you need to send me back. I don't want heaven if Peter isn't there. Just make me a ghostpire, too...Well, technically I would just be a ghost, wouldn't I? Since I've never been a pire, vampire I mean. So, yeah, ghost me up, please," my gorgeous girl rambled, and I couldn't help a chuckle.

"Is that truly what you choose?" I would swear that I heard a touch of humor there.

"Wait, you said I get a wish. Are we talking about anything? Are you a genie? Is this your bottle that I've been visiting, because if it is, let me just say that that is one ugly sofa. No offense."

"You have been granted one wish, child. Choose carefully," the voice repeated, and it seemed quieter than before. Bella seemed to notice this as well, and I could tell that she was working really hard to throw off her shock and think things through clearly. She looked bewildered and disbelieving for a second, before she shrugged as if to say 'stranger things have happened.'

"I wish for time to be reset for everyone... to my first day in Forks...with my memory fully intact," she whispered after a moment, speaking slowly. Her face was scrunched in concentration, and I could practically hear her thoughts as she tried to make sure she'd covered all her bases. My beautiful mate had made her dying wish.

"So be it," the voice said, and I swear it sounded pleased.

~~~.~~~

I was knocked back into myself, literally, as I felt Jasper's fist connect with my face just as I gained consciousness. My head jerked back from the force, burying into...dirt? When the fuck did I come outside? My head was spinning and I struggled to shake the cobwebs from my brain and make sense of everything. There were loud voices seeming to come from everywhere and I groaned as I grabbed my head. I had such a fucking headache.

"What the fuck? Why'd you punch me?" I groaned out, glaring at my maker as I shook the dirt from my hair. Everyone was silent for a second, before they all started talking at once again. I decided to focus on the only one of them who mattered to me, and ignore the rest. Especially since the fucker had just punched me for no damn reason.

"You have been out of it for hours, Peter. I was just trying to wake your ass up from your stupor. Now tell me what happened. And you better start with where the fuck you put Bella," Jasper growled out.

"Bella?" I asked, like a stupid shit. Apparently my mind still wasn't quite up to speed. Jasper grabbed me by the neck and pinned me to a tree.

"Yes, Bella. You better tell me where the fuck she is, _brother_," he sneered. "Right. The. Fuck. Now." I growled, wanting to rip the fucker to shreds for him getting possessive over my mate. My...mate? And then it all came back to me, making my head hurt so much that I was afraid it would split in two. I convulsed, fucking convulsed, as my memories settled into place, seemingly burning their way into my head.

When it was over, I relaxed slightly, grimacing as an aftershock tore through me. I looked around and noticed that I was on the ground, as was every other vampire there. Jasper must have been projecting that shit, because they were all still clutching their heads. And then Jasper's words penetrated my mind. My mate was gone. I jumped to my feet, and hauled Jasper's ass up with me.

"Bella finished the change right before I...blacked out. We have to find her, track her," I said franticly, different scenarios flowing through my mind, each one worse than the last.

"It's hard to track someone who doesn't have a scent," Jasper muttered as he started to pace. "We will all just have to split up and cover as much ground as we can. We will keep in touch by cell. She's a newborn; she'll be driven by the need to hunt."

At that moment, I was reminded that my gift was back online when I heard a soft voice float through my head. My eyes widened in horror. Jasper, sensing my emotions, was instantly back at my side.

"Oh, she's going hunting alright," I said softly. "She's going vampire hunting."


	27. Chapter 27

**Bella's POV**

**.**

I spent a long, boring time in my dreamscape, pacing the room with no one for company but myself. When I finally did regain consciousness, I half expected to see Victoria's sneering face. Imagine my surprise when I opened my eyes and found myself staring into the crimson gaze of my mate.

I could see everything so _clearly_ now, even through my peripheral view. Yes, my eyesight was greatly improved over human standards due to Victoria's numerous munching, but it was nothing compared to now. I could see _everything_.

I had thought Peter was handsome before, of course. But nothing, and I mean nothing, could have prepared me for just how absolutely breathtaking I would find him now. It was like I had never seen him before; my old eyes just did not do this exquisite creature justice. It was almost surreal; he was almost too perfect. I will admit to feeling a wee bit intimidated for a second, before I noticed that his imperfections were still there as well.

I felt a tug at my heart when I noticed that his nose was still just a little bit crooked, and there, just above his left eye, was the same bite mark that he had once tried so vehemently to hide from me, only whereas before it was barely noticeable, now it seemed to stand out thanks to my superior vision. Personally, I liked it there. To me, it only added to his character; it simply was Peter, and therefore perfection.

Satisfied with my peripheral inspection of things, I focused back on what was directly in my line of vision; my mate's eyes. Our eyes stayed locked, Peter's startled crimson gaze holding my own, for what seemed like forever but was probably only mere seconds. And then I watched, horrified, as he fell to his ass on the floor, his eyes glazing over and then rolling up into his head as his body jerked convulsively for a moment, before going deadly still.

I shot forward, surprising myself at the speed at which I reached his side. I gently stroked his face with my fingertips, starting slightly as I realized that his skin now felt soft and warm to me. I glanced down to see my own hand, pale and sparkling in the sunlight that was streaming in through the window.

Wow. I'm actually a vampire now. Who'd a thunk it? Take that, Edward, I thought viciously as I remembered all the times that he had adamantly protested my joining his race, both in this timeline and the last. Bastard.

Peter violently convulsed again, effectively pulling me from my mental 'Edward's a douche' musings. After a few moments of me softly stroking his hair, he finally calmed once more. What the fuck was wrong with him? Had I somehow broken my mate? I didn't remember doing anything to him, but what if I had some horrible gift like seizure eyes? Did I make him convulse just by looking at him? Was I going to have to wear special sunglasses for the rest of my existence, just like Cyclops from X-Men?

_You don't have 'seizure eyes' Bella. Gah. Although, if you could make him convulse like that during sex, it would definitely prove your prowess._

How do you know that I don't have seizure eyes? You live in my head, therefore nullifying my eyes' effect on you, since I can't actually look at you. Holy shit, I killed my mate!

_Slow down, drama queen. He isn't dead. He's just...rebooting. He'll be perfectly fine...eventually. _

How would you even know? You're just a voice in my head; a manifestation of my crazy.

_Have I ever steered you wrong?_

Yes! Remember that time with the goldfish? Oh, and the time you convinced me that I just had to eat that-

_OK! Okay. I do see your point. And it wasn't really all _that_ bad._

Wasn't that bad? I was sick for three days! I almost had to have my stomach pumped!

_Meh. Details. Anyway...Peter is fine. More than fine, actually. You'll see. Trust me._

Famous last words. And what do you mean, he'll be more than fine?

And that was when I remembered that Peter didn't want me anyway. I was just a pet, he'd said; food. Was that all I was in his eyes? The Cullen's pet? Why did he change me then? Did he feel he had to do it out of guilt? Because he felt it was just a little bit his fault that the stupid human wrecked her truck? Would I be forced to live an eternity alone? Loveless? Did no one want me?

Too many dark questions flooded my mind, and I panicked. I pulled back from Peter, and fled. Down the stairs and out the door I went, letting my instinct take over. Before I realized what I was doing, I was miles away and launching myself at a deer. I sank my teeth into it, purring when its red hot life-force flowed freely into my mouth. All too soon, it was gone, nothing but an empty shell. Kind of like I felt.

I threw the carcass aside, and tried to think of what I should do next. I could almost feel the newborn strength coursing through my body. Too bad I couldn't find Victoria and put it to good use. Even if I could somehow track her, though, knowing my luck, I'd just lose the fight and she'd end up killing me anyway. Still, that would be a risk I'd damn sure take if it meant having a shot at ending her miserable existence.

_Are you positive? Would you really risk it all just for revenge?_

Memories flooded me, then. Memories of the dead, lifeless eyes of my parents, their faces frozen in twin expressions of horror, and at that moment, I knew. Yes, I would risk it all. I simply could not, _would_ _not_, live in the same world as Victoria. When I found her, it would be to the grave. Me, or her; 'til death do us part. I had never been more sure of anything in my life.

_If you're sure...I can lead you to where she is._

...Huh?...

_Eloquent little thing, aren't you? I said, I can lead you to her. You know, show you the way; conduct, escort._

"How could you possibly know the way?" I asked aloud, only to gasp and cover my mouth with my hands. Bells. My voice sounded like singing, like the pealing of bells. If everything else went tits up, I suppose I could always become a seedy lounge singer, I thought morosely.

_You're not going to become a lounge singer. Gah! You are so scatterbrained sometimes. And, yes, I do know the way. I'm your 'voice' now, remember. I'm a stealthy bitch and snuck on over when no one was looking._

"I think I'm having a mental breakdown," I muttered, but couldn't help grinning at the ringing quality of my voice.

_Focus!_

Yes ma'am! Now what do you mean, you snuck over? Over where? Hmm...I have such a vivid imagination and love of English that I could probably add writing to my list of possible careers, I mused.

_I swear, it's like talking to a two year old. *sighs* Okay, I snuck over from Peter's head when he was connected to you through your dreamscape. Remember how he told you about his 'gift'? Yeah, well let's just say that he has one less voice in his head now and good riddance. It was soo fucking noisy over there. I like it here. It's quiet._

Okay, I honestly don't know whether to be flattered or insulted. Are you trying to insinuate that my head is full of air? That I don't think that much? No, don't answer that. Sooo...are you saying that I have the 'gift' of knowing shit now?

_To an extent. I sometimes hear things and will pass them on to you. Not all that often, though, unfortunately. That's why I was part of a whole; only one in a group of many. We each hear things from different...areas, if you know what I mean._

No. No, I can honestly say that I _don't_ know what you mean...and, truthfully, I don't think I want to. Now, about Victoria...can you see the outcome? Do I win?

_I think I liked this better when you thought you were just crazy. I'm not a psychic, Bella. I don't know what will happen or who will win. What I do know, is where Icky Vicky is. I have a vague feeling that you'll be in for a surprise, but I honestly can't say if it'll be a good 'ding dong the bitch is dead' surprise or a bad 'oops I got myself dead' surprise. Only time will tell._

Some help you are. So, it's me or her? I already knew that. But, you do know where she is and that's a helluva lot more than I know at the moment. So, yeah, thanks.

_Them. It's you or them. Can't forget the tracker or dreads. I have to go on record and say that this is a very bad idea. I'm talking like EF-6 tornado bad._

There's no such thing as an EF-6 tornado. It only goes up to EF-5.

_Exactly! This is like epic fucking bad. Hey, I make a good voice of reason, don't I? And fuck knows, you need one. Now if only you'd listen._

Point taken. I'll be careful. Is there anything else that you've 'heard', or is that it? Oh damn, look at the rack on that deer. It's fucking huge. Bet it's tasty!

While one part of my extra-large super-duper vampire brain had been focusing on conversation, the rest of it had been tracking a particularly tasty smelling deer. I stalked up behind him until he spooked and took off running, and then I gave chase. Too easy, I thought, as I pounced onto his back, wincing as I heard its bones snapping like twigs. I sank my teeth into his throat as I rode him to the forest floor. Too fucking easy...but pretty damn tasty.

I finished my meal, sucking until there was nothing left, and then quickly discarded the carcass and took off again, letting myself be pulled this way and that.

"You're leading me to her, somehow, aren't you?" I asked my voice, who I was really going to have to name soon. Hhmm. That should be interesting. I would have it make it something really good to make up for the time that she convinced me to eat that- I'm not even going there again, I thought with a shudder.

_Yes, I am leading you there, against my better judgment, I might add. You are not invincible just because you're strong now. You're like an addict hopped up on drugs, thinking you can't be defeated...but you're not all-powerful. Just think about it. Although..._

Although...? Come on, spill.

_Although, I do know that you have no scent, so that should help. Oh, and James and Victoria are fighting over something or another. I'm not 100% on anything, but I have this feeling that now is the time to strike, even if my almost non-existent common sense is telling me to run screaming the other way._

"Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence," I muttered, still letting myself be pulled from here to there. So I had no scent? That could come in very handy, indeed. I was going to be one very stealthy bitch. Emmett better watch out.

Thinking about Emmett made me think about the Cullen's. I wondered where they were and why they left me in their house alone. Well, alone besides Mr. "why is the V-8 talking back", anyway. My heart squeezed painfully as I recalled his words. Weren't some of my memories supposed to fade? If so, why couldn't that have been one of them?

I actually couldn't find any holes in my memory, so I'm assuming that I didn't lose anything. Although if I did, I wouldn't remember that I lost it, now would I? My memories from before Victoria were kinda hazy, like I'm viewing them through a really dirty window, but they were still all intact as far as I could recall.

The ones from afterward were clearer, but still fairly hazy. The memories from since I awoke as a vampire were perfect, though. Kind of like having a really expensive HD-DVR in your head. I could just pause, rewind, fast-forward, and play that shit like a movie. And I could do it all, while still thinking about 142 other different things. Gotta love that vampire mind. It meant that I could obsess over Peter's harsh words 24/7 while still functioning on the outside. Just dandy, that.

And, damn, I hope he's okay. I shouldn't have left him alone like that, but after remembering his words...it simply overwhelmed me. I just love him so much, and to remember him speaking those words to me...as if I were nothing to him, as if I didn't think that he single-handedly hung the moon. It shattered my heart into pieces and I had to run.

Just like I ran after he first spoke them...and that didn't quite go as planned. I never planned on crashing my truck and almost killing myself. I just needed to get away...I was too chicken-shit to stay. I really needed to work on not running away from my problems.

Regardless of whether I should have ran away or not, Peter was still at fault for the way he treated me. How could he say those things to me after all we'd been through? But then again, I don't suppose he remembered our time together. He only saw me as a human girl who was visiting the Cullen's house. He probably assumed that I was just another one of the Cullen's experiments into humanity; a disposable commodity that could easily be replaced by any one of the billions of humans on this planet.

But not anymore, I decided firmly. I wasn't human anymore; I wasn't prey. I was a predator; a hunter, and after I finished my hunt for Victoria, I was going to start a new hunt. I was going to hunt down my mate, and I wasn't going to stop until he knew damn good and well just who I was to him. I was not going to sit around and mope for a mindless eternity while my other half was out there oblivious. No, I was going to have my happily ever after. Peter was mine, and it was damn time that he knew it.


	28. Chapter 28

**Bella POV**

.

"Seattle? Are you fucking kidding me? They're still in Washington?" I asked my voice, who I had decided to dub 'Bunny' since she had literally hopped into my head. We were currently on the outskirts of Seattle, though still deep in a wooded area.

_Yes. I told you that something was happening between James and Victoria, remember?_

Of course I remember. That was like, an hour ago.

_Just checking. I forgot just how scatterbrained newborns are. Seriously, you have the attention span of a two-year-old right now. _

Oh, look! Shiny!

_Point made. *sighs* Bella, put the bottle top down, please. Focus!_

Sheesh. I was just fucking with you...mostly. It is super shiny, though, isn't it? Okay, okay. I'm putting the shiny down. Now, what about James and Victoria?

_I now know that they are fighting over a human...sort of. _

Sort of? What exactly does 'sort of' entail?

_I'm not really sure. I just know that the word 'human' is kinda iffy feeling to me. *shrugs* I'm not all-knowing. You need to be careful, though. We're getting close to them now._

Roger that. Or should I say 'Bunny that'? Nah, it just doesn't have the same ring to it.

I silently climbed a large oak, and then gracefully hopped from tree to tree. Maybe having Bunny inside my head was helping me with my hopping skills, because, damn, I was good at this shit! I tightened up my shield, thickening it until I could almost physically see it shimmering around me.

I heard it before I saw them, horrible wracking screams coming from up ahead. I honestly didn't think I'd have to worry about being heard, as the girl's shrieks were just that fucking loud. At first, I assumed that I was hearing their dinner, but after the horrendous noise continued on and on, I started thinking that maybe something else was happening.

And then I came upon them...all four of them. Well, technically more like three and a half. I now knew what Bunny had meant about the word 'human' being iffy. Lying on the grass, just barely in my line of vision, I could see a small young girl. She was maybe fourteen, if that, with short, dark hair. And she was screaming her head off, burning up with the change.

I slowly crept forward, making sure to keep my shield strengthened to the max. I could hear James and Victoria arguing over the girl. I hunched down in a bushy tree, and watched the scene unfold.

"Why, James? Am I not enough for you anymore? I'm worth a million of these scrawny humans," Victoria sneered, kicking the changing human in the stomach. I doubt the girl even noticed, too consumed by the burning flames of the venom eating her body.

"Drop it, Victoria," James growled loudly. "You didn't have any objections when you were out fucking that human male Riley. What was it that you said...he was a very pleasurable dinner?"

"That's different, and you know it. I could care less how many humans you fuck, but to actually _change_ one of them? What the hell, James? I am your _mate_. I stayed here in this shithole of a town for almost a week, so you could track down this little human and have your fun. I didn't know that you were planning on changing her!" she shrieked loudly, stomping her foot on the ground at the same time. Damn, I should have brought some popcorn...oh wait, I can't eat popcorn anymore. Hmm, what would the vampire equivalent of popcorn be? Baby chicks?

"We've been over this already, Victoria," James said calmly, although his agitation was written all over his face. "I'm only changing her because we need a larger coven. Just last week, we came across those other vampire scents. There were seven of them. Seven! We would stand no chance, even with our combined gifts. We needed another member, so I changed Bree."

"Oh, so it's 'Bree' now, is it? Why did you pick someone so puny to add to our coven? Why did it have to be this particular human that you have been obsessing over for the last few days? Why not choose a large human male? That would have made much more sense, wouldn't it have, Laurent?"

"Don't pull me into this," Laurent mumbled, looking uncomfortable. "I have no stake in this particular lover's quarrel."

"Yes, you've always been a chicken-shit, haven't you? That's why you're a follower and not a leader," Victoria said haughtily. Laurent took another step back from them, as if trying to distance himself from the whole damn issue. I didn't blame him one bit for that.

"Let's find someone else, James," Victoria begged, wrapping herself suggestively around James' body. She motioned over at the still-screaming girl, Bree, and said, "We can discard this trash and start over."

In a move almost too fast for even my eyes, James had Victoria pinned to the forest floor, his hands tightly gripping her throat. I couldn't control the small gasp that escaped my mouth from the sudden shock of it all, but thankfully it went unheard in all the other commotion. After a few seconds, James lightened his grip.

"You know that there is no one else but you, my love," James cooed to her, removing his hands from her neck and gently stroking her face. "This filth means nothing to me, but I do believe that she may have a useful gift. I wanted to surprise you with it, but you just had to drag it out of me, didn't you? I can't pull anything over on you, darling."

It was seriously creepy watching this display. I could almost physically see the insincerity of James' words, but Victoria seemed to eat them up, smiling and purring at him. I also didn't miss the way that he had to force his words out, especially when he called the turning girl 'filth'. If I had to guess, I'd wager that James had just found his actual mate. I briefly wondered why he would even bother keeping Victoria around, but her next sentence answered that question.

"But my gift of evasion is enough for us, isn't it? It's always gotten us out of trouble before," Victoria purred at him as she ground herself into his body. James quickly leapt off of her, throwing her a smile that looked more like a grimace. Well, at least I thought so, anyway.

"We can discuss this later. Her change will be complete soon and I need to go find her a meal," James said, already walking towards what I knew was Seattle.

"Fine," Victoria huffed. "I'll stay and watch your little pet for you." James seemed to hesitate for a brief second, before walking to Victoria and wrapping her in his arms.

"There will be a reward in it for you, my naughty girl," he hissed into her ear as his hands balled themselves into her wild mane of hair. He fisted it and tugged sharply, causing Victoria to moan in what I could only assume was pleasure. James nipped at her exposed neck, before making his way back up to Victoria's lips and forcefully shoving his tongue in her mouth.

He pulled back after a few moments, hissing a low, "Later," into her ear. And then he was gone, leaving a slightly dazed Victoria behind. She stayed there, lying on the ground, until James' footsteps could no longer be heard. Then she jumped to her feet, and spun around to face Laurent.

Laurent instantly took another step back, gazing at Victoria the way one would regard a crazy person. I should know, I have been the recipient of that particular look many times before.

"I need you to play look-out for me. Wait at the top of that hill that's about five miles east of here- you'll be able to see James coming long before he arrives. If I still haven't come and found you by then, then you damn well better get your ass back here and warn me if you see him coming. Oh, and don't mind the smoke," she said, grinning dementedly.

"This is a bad idea, Victoria," Laurent said hesitantly. "James is going to be furious."

"Do what I say or you will join her in the flames," she snarled at him. "Did you honestly think that I was going to let this go? That I would let him keep this little whelp? No. James will get over it. She's just one human, after all."

Laurent was still hesitant, but after another not-so-veiled threat, he took off for look-out duty. I watched as Victoria spoke to the still screaming girl, cursing her and calling her names. Maybe Victoria wasn't so oblivious to the way James coveted the girl, after all.

I felt really horrible watching Victoria demean the girl and doing nothing, but the way I saw it was that the human girl had died when James sank his teeth into her neck. There was no telling what the sadistic fuck had done to her before he changed her, and I honestly didn't think that kind of change would produce a sane vampire. Not to mention the cruelty of being stuck in a thirteen-year-old body for all of eternity. No, I figured that an actual death would probably be kindest at this point.

Despite having convinced myself that death would be a mercy for this girl, I still almost pounced when Victoria ripped the first appendage from her. She was far enough into the change that only venom leaked out of where her arm once was. I tensed, preparing myself to leap. Only Bunny's screaming voice inside my head kept me from springing from the tree.

_No! Stop! Look at her. Stop and take a good look!_

So I did. Victoria was crouched in a defensive position, head jerking from side to side as she scanned for threats. At first, I was worried that she had somehow sensed me. After a few moments, however, she straightened back up and smiled before continuing with her taunting.

_She doesn't know you're here. She was just making sure that James wasn't here. You need to wait until she lets her guard down completely-probably when she removes the head. It's your best chance to catch her by surprise. It's the only chance you have, Bella._

But...the girl will die.

_Would life as she is truly be merciful? You know what has to happen. You've already reasoned it out in your head. The human girl, Bree, died days ago, Bella, and you know it. Even now she begs for true death._

And it was true. The girl was now screaming over and over for death; begging for someone to just kill her. Her heart was beating faster and faster now. I watched as Victoria ripped her other arm off, barely keeping myself still. Again, Victoria crouched and scanned for danger, although this time she rose much quicker.

_If you attack now, it will only end in both of your deaths. Victoria's gift is more than it seems. Along with the 'evasiveness', she also has heightened speed and strength. You have to catch her totally off-guard to kill her. _

I winced at the loud grating sound that came when Victoria removed a leg. She didn't crouch down this time, only paused for thirteen seconds to examine her surroundings. Then she went back to her taunting. She was really getting into it now. Maybe...

_Not yet! Do you have a death wish? Look at her body carefully. See how alert she is? She's still too observant. If you really think that you can save the girl, you can always just put her back together afterwards. _

Yes. Yes, I could. I could save her, take her under my care. I could teach her our ways, help her learn to feed off animals and eventually be controlled enough to be around humans again. Well, as soon as I gained enough control to be around them as well. Hell, we could learn together.

_That isn't very realistic, you know. A newborn taking care of a newborn. Just sayin..._

The Cullen's will help her. They owe me that much, at least. I will guilt them into it, if need be. I feel better now. I have a plan.

At that very moment, Victoria shattered any hopes that I'd harbored over keeping the girl. She had quickly pulled a lighter out of her pocket and lit the stack of limbs that she'd made a few yards away from the girl. She was laughing, her body relaxed as she bent over Bree, her shockingly red hair obstructing my view as she got closer to her neck.

_NOW!_

I quickly pounced. I landed directly on Victoria's back and immediately sank my teeth into her throat, grabbing her wild mane of hair and using it to help rip her head from her body. I leapt from her body as it crashed to the ground, jumping back and tightening my hold on her hair. I had done it! I had actually killed the bitch. Yet, standing here, staring down at Bree's now lifeless eyes (I guess that she wasn't far enough into the change that she could survive decapitation) I didn't feel as satisfied as I thought I would. I could only imagine just how many deaths this demon was responsible for. The bitch simply hadn't suffered enough for her actions.

A slow smile grew upon my face as plans started to form inside my head. Oh yesss, this was going to be sweet. I laughed aloud at the shocked expression on Victoria's face. Her mouth was open spewing silent threats, her face twisted in an ugly manner.

For some reason, vampires couldn't speak once their heads had been removed. They were still aware, still fully coherent, and they could open their mouths and form words, just no sound came out. Carlisle could probably give some long medical explanation, but, me, I simply accepted it as fact and moved on.

And what a wonderful fact it was, I thought, as I watched Victoria's mouth open in what I'm sure would have been a scream. I laughed. She wouldn't be warning anybody today...or ever again. But this definitely wasn't the time to gloat. No, I had work to do.

"You just sit right here and enjoy the show. It's going to be a sizzler," I said with a laugh as I positioned Victoria's head on the tree branch that I had been hiding on earlier. She was going to have a front row seat to the fuckery that was to come.

I stared down at her for a moment, my hatred for the woman undoubtedly clear on my face. She stared up at me, and slowly mouthed one word: why. In that moment, as I stared deep into her crimson eyes, I wished nothing more than to be able to show her, to let her see just what she was being punished for.

Victoria seemed to still before jerking violently, her eyes momentarily rolling up into her head. A few minutes later, when her eyes focused upon me once more, I could see the recognition and disbelief there. She opened her mouth in a silent wail of agony, her face scrunched up in terror. She remembered me. Somehow, she remembered everything.

An evil grin slowly consumed my face. This was going to be fun, indeed.


	29. Chapter 29

**Bella POV**

.

I let out one last demented chuckle, before turning from Victoria and walking toward the pyre. Bree's parts were still burning, the smoke coming off of them a deep purple. I quickly dismembered Victoria, my eyes trained on her face the entire time, and then fed each and every piece of her body into the pyre as she watched in horror. After tossing in the remaining pieces of the already dead Bree, I stood back to admire my work.

I watched for a moment as the flames consumed the pile, already turning the pale bodies into ash. The violet smoke bellowed up around me, looking almost solid as it rolled off the orange flames. And the smell...the smell was horrid. Sickly sweet like a million different sticks of incense all burning at the same time. It reeked, bad.

With one last glance at Victoria's stunned face, I turned and ran east toward Laurent. He would be next and I would make it fast, I decided. I never really had any deep issues with Laurent. He was simply a submissive tool, weak enough to be used and manipulated by those around him. He followed orders like a good little soldier, with no balls of his own to speak of.

I was very careful when I approached the hill, even though I could see Laurent was facing the other direction. I slowly crept my way closer, making sure to tread as lightly as was possible. Just as I sprang to pounce at him, he turned my direction. He had just enough time to see his death coming, but not enough to be able to avoid it.

My teeth sank into his neck as my hands found purchase in his dreadlocks. In seconds, it was done; his head and body were separated. I carried both pieces back to the still smoldering fire, then quickly and methodically removed his limbs. I fed each piece of him into the flames, all the while reminding myself that he would have ended me in a second, if given the chance.

As I tossed in Laurent's head, I heard it. Horrible female screams assaulted my ears, putting me on high alert. James was back and he had brought dinner, as promised. Shit! What to do, what to do. I quickly hid myself in the tree with Victoria's head, wincing as the sounds grew closer. And then, with a loud pop, the screams stopped. James must have seen the smoke and decided to lighten his load. The human was in pain no more.

Seconds later, he was there, his eyes wide as he took in the scene. I could see his nostrils flare as he tried to pick up my non-existent scent. His face took on a look of concentration, quickly followed by disbelief and rage. Hmm. It seemed his tracking skills didn't work on me. Good to know.

His eyes were black with anger as he threw his head back and let out a terrible roar. My hair seemed to stand on end, and my fear shot up a few notches. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all, I thought as I watched him turn and start to destroy the trees behind him in a fit of rage. Oh fuck, oh fuck. I really had to do something before he reached my tree!

My fear was paralyzing in its intensity, my fight or flight instincts were hammering down upon me. What to do, what to do. Fuck! Memories crashed down upon me, memories of a scared human in a ballet studio. But I wasn't her anymore...I wasn't that same scared human that I once was. I wasn't human at all. I was a vampire now. A predator, not prey. And I wasn't just a vampire, I was a newborn. I was stronger than this monster. Faster. I could do this.

I crouched down, preparing to launch myself at him. I tensed, ready to spring. And, then, I...I hesitated. Oh fuck, I couldn't do this. Why did I come here again? Shit! Fuck! Damn! And double damn! What was I going to do?

James looked up then, straight into my eyes. My choices gone, my decision was made. I would fight.

There were no words exchanged, no witty repartee spewed forth from either side. I pounced at the same time that he did, and we collided in midair. There was a loud boom, like boulders crashing together. And then we were crashing to the ground, rolling in the dirt as we both grappled for the dominant position.

James teeth sank into my arm, the same arm that he had once bitten when I was a human, and filled it with venom. And holy fucking damn, did it sting. The total absence of all of the normal human aches and pains since I had awoken as a vampire had made me feel indestructible...like I was above pain. Well, let me tell ya, I was brought crashing back down to Earth as his venom-covered teeth tore through my flesh.

I let out a yelp in surprise from the pain. I heard his dark chuckle all the way to my toes as he watched me scramble away from him, quickly putting some distance between us. He gave me a twisted smile and took a step towards me, which I quickly countered by taking a hefty step backwards. This caused him to chuckle again.

"I'm going to enjoy breaking you. You'll make a worthy mate once I teach you your place," he said softly, almost kindly. Warning bells were going off in my head at this point, and I was just an inch away from flipping right the fuck out.

"I thought the turning one was your mate...your scent was all over her," I said just as softly. I didn't understand this. Wasn't he still upset over the loss of his mate? A muscle twitched in his face, but that was the only sign of emotion that I could find.

"If you took care of her and her protectors so easily, then obviously they weren't truly worthy of me," he said, still smiling that chilling smile. I shivered violently at his words. Could he really be so callus?

"Yes, I do believe that I will enjoy this, very much," he said, slowly licking his lips. And then he was running, pouncing on me and knocking me to the ground. His hips straddled mine and I could feel just how excited he was about this. I bucked violently, knowing that I was stronger than him, trying desperately to buck him off me, but he had a solid hold on my neck. Unless I wanted to decapitate myself, I was stuck.

I stilled, knowing that my thrashing was doing nothing more than turning him on farther. He loosened his hold slightly and smiled at me.

"There's a good girl," he said quietly, bringing one of his hands up to stroke my hair. I tried, but was unable to contain my shudder of revulsion. "You know it's futile to resist, don't you?"

And then he made his fatal mistake. He stared deep into my eyes and said one single word...Why. I was immediately reminded of what had happened earlier with Victoria and for the first time since getting pinned, I felt a sliver of hope spark within me. I would have to time everything perfectly, but at least I had a plan now. I braced myself, stared deep into his eyes, and concentrated on unlocking his memories of the past.

It worked. I watched as he shook violently, his eyes momentarily rolling into his head. It lasted only a few seconds, but a few seconds were all I needed. I threw myself forward, sitting up, and latched my teeth into his throat as I twisted his head to the left. I almost screamed in relief when his head disconnected from his body. My hands went slack and his head fell, rolling across the ground until it bumped up against a fallen tree.

_Surprise!_

"Yes, surprise indeed," I chuckled aloud. I forced myself to get to my feet, when all I felt like doing was reveling in my relief for a decade or two. I made quick work of James' limbs, creating a pile on top of his torso and using Victoria's lighter to set it aflame. My laughter rang out through the woods as I watched his pale skin turn to ash.

I turned back and picked up his silent head by his hair, making a pit stop to the treetop so I could do the same with Victoria's head. And then I left the scene, heading back the way I came, a head swinging from both hands and my laughter ringing out as I banged them together over and over again.

**~~~~~.~~~~~**

.

**Peter POV (we last left him chasing after Bella)**

.

_No!_ My mind screamed the word over and over in a continuous loop as I saw the purple smoke bellowing up ahead of me. I ran toward it, pushing myself as fast as I could run. Jasper ran by my side, the Cullen's shortly behind us. I could feel the hopelessness and desolation flowing from Jasper in waves. He wasn't expecting to find Bella alive.

"Stop it," I growled at him. "It isn't Bella. Bella's just fine. She has to be." He jerkily nodded in agreement, even though I knew he didn't believe me. I felt his rising anger start to roll over me then. Whoever we found, if it wasn't Bella, wouldn't leave this forest alive.

A few moments later, we came upon the newly-formed clearing. There were pieces of shredded trees strung everywhere; the total destruction of the area made my breath catch. Where was my mate? Was she ripped apart along with the trees?

There were two burning pyres, one of which was almost out but the other was still burning strong. We quickly approached the newest one, and I almost shouted in joy. Underneath the sweet stench of the smoke, I could clearly discern a single vampire's scent. Male, I decided after taking another deep breath. A male that I had never come across before.

"One vampire," I said quietly.

"Male," Jasper added. I looked at him and nodded my agreement.

"You need to come over here," Edward said softly from the other pyre. My heart clenched and I make a choking sound. Did he find her? Was my kitten truly no more? No! She couldn't be gone. She just couldn't! I hadn't even gotten to tell her that I remembered her, that I loved her. She couldn't be dead.

"No," Edward murmured, reading my thoughts. "I don't think that she is. But there are three different scents here, and I was wondering if you could identify them." I walked to him slowly, my mind having problems with his last statement. My voices had told me that she was hunting the three nomads; James, Victoria, and Laurent. They said nothing about a fourth. Who would be the fourth? Unless, it was... No!

"I recognize two of the three," I said softly after I took in the mixed scents of the ashes. "The male is Laurent; I memorized his scent when I came across him in the woods trying to kill Bella. The other is Victoria; I'd know that bitch's stench anywhere. The other one...female, I believe, smells funny. Not quite...right."

"I agree," Jasper said. His eyes widened in shock as he whipped around to stare at me. "What do you mean; you came across Laurent in the woods trying to kill Bella?"

"That's not important right now," I snapped. "We need to find my mate!"

They stared at me then, eyes wide and mouths open. I ignored them all, focusing inward and trying to coax some answers up from my voices. Finally, _finally_, I got an answer, even if it wasn't quite the answer that I was expecting.

_She's gone back home to serve her brand of justice...eternally. What a hellcat that one is...I should have jumped ship when I had the chance._

The two sentences muttered by the grumpy male left me with more questions than answers, but I quickly shoved them to the back of my head to ponder upon later. Bella was alive and safe. And she was headed back to Forks. I quickly relayed this to the Cullen's, and then shot off in the direction from which we had just come. I was going to find my mate.

We ran, faster and faster until we came upon the Cullen's house. Bella wasn't there, I knew that the second I stepped onto their property. I felt a strong pull, and I somehow knew that it was leading me to her, to my mate. I took off again, letting the pull lead me onward.

When I finally came upon my mate, I gasped loudly at the sight before me. If I had still had a beating heart, this surely would have stopped it dead.

Bella was in the middle of a clearing, on what I knew to be the opposite side of the treaty line, laughing maniacally as she danced and twirled around a huge, horse-sized werewolf. Hanging from the werewolf's maw by the hair, were the two severed heads of James and Victoria.


	30. Chapter 30

**Bella POV**

.

I wrinkled my nose as I approached the treaty line, smiling when I heard a loud growl come from the other side. Sam was actually here.

_Did you ever doubt me? _

"Here wolfy, wolfy," I called out in a sing-song voice, smiling when I heard just how lovely it sounded. Gotta love the vamp voice. Another low growl answered me.

"I come bearing gifts!" I exclaimed, clinking my pretties together loudly. "Two for the price of one!"

And then I saw him, slinking his way out from the trees. He was freaking huge! I smiled widely as I held the heads out toward him. He cocked his head, confused, and studied me for a while. Then he shifted into a big naked Indian and hot damn was he built...everywhere! I could only hope that Peter was graced with such a big...package.

"What do you want, leech?" he all but snarled at me.

"I have a need to use your...facilities. I could make it worth your while," I said slowly, still trying to figure out exactly what to say. I needed his help, dammit.

"What game are you playing at? Choose your words carefully, bloodsucker. I usually kill your kind on sight. The only reason you aren't dead is because I'm curious about the two heads you hold."

"My eyes are only red because I'm newly turned, not because of my food preference," I sighed. "I'm all for the deer munchin'. Beef- it's what's for dinner. Wait, beef is used for cows, isn't it? Wonder what one would call deer? Deer- it's what's for dinner, just doesn't have the same ring to it."

_Focus!_

"Nevermind. What if I told you that I could keep you from making a mistake that would haunt you for the rest of your existence? One that you would have to face every single day? What if I told you that this information would protect Emily?" His face paled and he seemed shocked into place.

"H-how could you know about her?" he stuttered.

"I know you've heard about some vampires having special abilities," I said slowly. He nodded his head in agreement so I continued. "I have an ability as well. You see, I'm actually from the future."

And that was when I lost him.

He growled loudly at me and I could tell he was fixing to try and make good on his earlier threats.

"No, no. Hear me out," I said, holding my hands out before me. His eyes latched onto the two swinging heads and he surprised me by grinning just a little.

"You have to tell me about those," he stated, nodding to my pretties. I quickly agreed.

"Anyway, it's hard to explain what I can do. The best that I can say is that I can unlock your memories. You will have knowledge of what's going to happen, provided that something hasn't changed, for the next six or seven months. Consider it a timeline of memories that could be. Everything that you see will happen, unless you use the prior knowledge and change it," I sighed. I really sounded like a mental person.

"Uh-huh. And just what do these 'memories' have to do with protecting Emily? Who would I be protecting her from?" He seemed skeptic, to say the least, but at least he was still listening to me.

"From...you," I said softly. "You are going to get into an argument in the future, and you won't mean to do it, but you will lose control and change too close to her. The results...well, you will feel guilty for the rest of your life."

"Do it," he said quietly. "Show me."

So I did. I stared into his eyes and unlocked his memories, grimacing when he fell to the ground shaking. When he stood back up, tears were freely flowing down his cheeks.

"You said I can change this, right? I can stop this future from happening?" He took a few steps closer, his eyes pleading with me. "Tell me I can change it!"

"Yes, it can all be changed. Nothing is set in stone," I assured him. I wasn't expecting what happened next. Sam ran to me, throwing his arms around me and...hugging me? He squeezed me tightly, whispering his thanks and eternal gratitude in my ears. My nose scrunched at his scent, as his did at mine, but neither of us complained.

After I explained what I needed help with, Sam happily agreed. He changed back into his wolf form and took the heads into his mouth by the hair. We took off together towards La Push, and I couldn't help the happy dance that I was doing around him. James' and Victoria's faces were both frozen in masks of horror. They apparently didn't care for my plans for them, and that made me giddy as a fucking schoolgirl.

And then the Cullen's showed up, trying to kill my mood. Of course, Rose was the one who succeeded in doing so, that is until Sam put on a lovely little show for me to cheer me up. When I climbed onto his back, I couldn't resist teasing Peter a little. He instantly fought to get to me, and I have to say that I found his growls of possession sexy as hell. I calmed him with a wink and blew him a kiss, and then we were off, running towards La Push.

Sam slowed when he came upon what I'm guessing was his house. He dropped the heads to the ground, changed back to human form, and grabbed a pair of shorts that were hanging from the branch of a tree. He quickly pulled them on and grinned at me.

"Emily isn't here right now. She went to visit some family in Port Angeles for the weekend. Let me just grab a shovel and we can get started. I should be able to find the opening pretty easily since we had problems with it a couple years ago and had to dig it up."

He disappeared around the edge of the house and was gone for less than a minute before he returned with a shovel. I followed him to a spot about fifteen feet from his house, and watched as he examined the ground closely. He finally shrugged, and started digging. A good while later, he finally found the tank lid...on the opposite side of where he'd first started digging. He glanced over at me and I just smiled and raised an eyebrow.

"I never said I paid that much attention to where we were digging," he muttered, his cheeks turning pink. I laughed and walked over to where he was. Sam was clearing the last of the dirt off of a big concrete lid. He wedged the shovel under the edge of the lid and lifted it up, then leaned down and carefully plucked the lid from its enclosure.

"Oh fuckkk," I gagged, covering my nose as the reek of sewage rolled out of the hole. The stench was so fuck-awful that I felt my eyes fill with venom. Fuck!

_Hold your breath, you idiot. It's not like you have to breathe or anything._

Oh, yeah. I immediately ceased breathing, and although it felt very strange, it wasn't unbearable like the odor coming from the tank was. Sam was still beside me, gagging just as I had been.

"I didn't have a werewolf nose the last time I opened this shit," he choked out. I hid a smile and silently thanked Bunny for reminding me about the no-breathing thing.

I looked down into the septic tank and felt a wicked smile cover my face. It was completely and utterly disgusting. My new and improved vamp eyes took in every little detail, even though it was dark. The tank was filled with horribly rancid water; with chunks of ...waste floating all along the oily looking surface. A thick layer of sludge covered the bottom, visible only because of my excellent eyesight. If it had been possible, I do believe that I would have tossed my cookies at the sight.

"Let's do this shit," Sam coughed out. I nodded my head and danced to the spot where Sam had dropped the heads on the ground earlier. I laughed loud and long at the sheer horror covering James' and Victoria's faces. The redheaded bitch was even attempting to silently plead with me.

"Save it, bitch," I snarled, thinking back to the past. "Did you spare Charlie when he was pleading for his life? Or Renee? No, you laughed as you killed them, you sadistic cunt, and I will do no less for you."

I swiped them up by their hair, banging their heads together one last time just for shits and giggles, and made my way to the shithole. I made sure that they got a good, long look inside before I tossed first James and then Victoria's heads into the tank, laughing all the while. I watched as they slowly sank to the bottom, almost invisible to me now due to the thick layer of sludge that was rising around them. And still, I laughed.

Afterwards, I helped Sam replace the lid and bury the septic tank again. We worked in silence as we hid the evidence of my deranged revenge. When it was finished, the ground whole once more, Sam stood back and looked me up and down.

"I honestly don't know if I admire you, or if I'm just plain scared shitless of you at this point. That was just...yeah. That's taking torture to a whole new level, Bella," he said softly, and I could hear the honesty of his words.

"You haven't lived through the things that I have, Sam," I told him, voice cold. "If you had, you wouldn't be so quick to judge my actions. They deserve this and more, trust me."

"I do not doubt that for a second. I just wanted to make absolutely sure that this is what you wanted to do, that you wouldn't lose any sleep over it."

"I'm a vampire, Sam," I said softly. "I don't sleep at all."

And then I turned and ran towards my mate, murmuring a quick "Thanks" to Sam as I did so. I was aching to be wrapped in my angel's arms, away from the judgment of others. I could honestly say that I felt absolutely no remorse over my actions. Those sadistic fucks deserved everything that had been done to them.

I smiled as I remembered their faces slowly sinking under the ick. That part of my past was buried, quite literally, and I was dreading dealing with the only other issue from my past that had been left unresolved-the Cullen's.

Although...I now had the perfect excuse to spew all the shit at them that I wanted-I was a volatile newborn, prone to hissy-fits and rages. Nothing I said or did would be held against me during my newborn phase, and I damn well planned to take advantage of that fact. I could tell them all exactly what I thought without worrying about completely burning my bridges, should I ever need their help later. They had all better gird their loins, because I was taking no prisoners today.


	31. Chapter 31

**Peter POV**

.

"Bella, the treaty! Get back here!" Carlisle yelled, the first to pull himself from the fuckery of the scene before us. She paused mid-step in her dance and turned toward us. A huge smile lit her face as she cocked her head to the side and stared at us with her huge crimson eyes.

"I'm the police chief's daughter, I can go where I please...with the Alpha's permission, of course." She laughed, the sound like tinkling bells. "Don't worry about me, I'll be back soon."

"Now wait just a minute, you little bitch. We have spent all day long doing nothing but looking for your ass, only to find you here enjoying yourself with the mutt. You can't just tell us to go away," Rose shouted over my growl that had begun the instant she called my mate a bitch, and had steadily grew louder with every word out of her mouth.

Bella stared at us then, slowly letting the mask of happiness fall from her face, leaving behind a tired, cynical, world-weary girl. My heart ached for her and I longed to gather her in my arms. I was ready to do it, one foot already stepping forward, treaty be damned...until she opened her mouth and spoke again.

"I will come to your house when I'm finished." Each word was spoken slowly, crisply. Her crimson eyes bore into Rose's, daring her to utter a single fucking word. She broke their stare-down, allowing her burning eyes to sweep over each of us.

"You have all fucked me over, each in your own unique ways. I remember each and every time...and soon you will, as well," she said softly, a dark promise in her voice that I didn't fully understand.

The wolf growled at us, and then turned back to look at Bella. He swiftly shook his huge head, his actions causing the two heads still dangling from his mouth to bang together with loud clacking sounds.

Bella's whole face lit up and she threw her head back and laughed as the wolf continued his morose show for her. After a few moments, he stopped, tilting his head to the side in the direction of La Push. Then, to all of our amazement, he plopped down on his hind quarters and offered his back to Bella. She grinned and gracefully moved her small form until she was straddling the werewolf like a horse.

"This is first time that I've ever ridden anybody," Bella chuckled, a calculating glint in her eyes as she glanced back at me. I growled, low and deep, and took off towards my mate. She was mine. Mine! She shouldn't ride anybody but me!

Emmett and Jasper each grabbed an arm, jerking me back before I had gotten even ten feet forward. I growled at them, thrashing in their arms. They were keeping me away from my mate! I was about an inch away from losing my fuckin' shit...until I heard my kitten softly whisper my name. I stilled instantly and glanced over at her to find her smiling, _just fucking smiling_, at me like she wasn't sitting on the back of a fucking werewolf. What the fuck?

I think I must have said it out loud, because Bella chuckled quietly. After a moment, she winked at me, and blew me a kiss. And then she was gone, riding off deeper into forbidden territory on the back of the only other creature in existence that could destroy a vampire. Great. Just fucking great.

We all just stood there for a while, letting the shock wear off our brains. Esme finally ushered us all back to their house, telling us that Bella would be there shortly and we didn't want to risk missing her. The whole run was made in silence, except when Jasper leaned over to tell me that Bella had been playing with me when she made the whole 'riding' comment. Apparently she had sent him a wave of mischief before she spoke.

As we walked into the Cullen house, I trailed behind them as they began to file into the dining room. They each chose a seat at the huge table, while I opted to stand, leaning up against the wall. Three of them opened their mouths and started spewing out question after question. Carlisle finally quieted them, before announcing that we would go around the table and each ask one question. Alice stood up and flitted out of the room, only to return a few seconds later with a notebook and a pen.

By the time we finished, we had filled the notebook almost completely with all the questions that we had for Bella. Edward had told us that he couldn't get anything from Bella or from the wolf, most likely because she was shielding him. He had met a couple of wolves once before and had no problems reading their minds then.

Emmett was dying to know how Bella had managed to kill four vampires all by herself. We knew that the wolf hadn't been with her then, because the scene in Seattle hadn't reeked of wet dog. There had been no other scents there, so we knew that she had to have killed them all on her own. She needed a fucking vampire cookie for that feat. Maybe a spotted deer? We could call it Macadamia nut.

And just what the hell was the whole head thing about? Just what was she planning to do with them? Did the La Push tribe mount them to wooden poles and post them near the treaty line to ward off stray vamps? Carlisle assured me that they didn't, but I still wasn't so sure.

How did she know where to find the nomads? How does she have so much control as a newborn? How does she know the wolf? How did she get permission to cross the treaty line? Again, what the fuck was up with the severed heads? For some reason, my mind kept throwing up images of a treaty line marked by vampire heads, all of their mouths open in a silent warning to stay away. I shuddered. That would be a miserable eternity.

And then there was still the question of how to stage Bella's death. Edward wanted to go ahead and plant her wrecked truck somewhere, but my loud growls shut him up real quick. Bella deserved to have a say and we would damn well wait until she got back here to decide what would be done.

It was now in the early hours of Sunday morning, and Bella still wasn't back yet. I was twitching with worry, obsessively replaying my memories of Bella and I together in her dreamscape to calm myself. I had caught Edward looking at me funny on several occasions throughout the night, and now the fucker was doing it again. Just fucking staring at me. My control snapped and before I knew what I was doing, I had him pinned up against the wall by his throat, growling loudly at him.

"What the fuck is your problem?" I snarled at him, not loosening my grip. The rest of the Cullen's were in the room now, and I could hear Alice ordering Jasper to 'make him behave'. Bitch. Like I was a fucking dog or some shit. It's no wonder that Bella told Laurent that she was the Cullen family pet. If they treat another vampire this way, I can only imagine how they treated Bella when she was human.

Although, I really don't have much fucking room to talk on that subject, now do I? After all, I was the one who made the V-8 comment...something that I would gladly spend the rest of eternity making up for. And judging by Bella's last words to us, she was more than willing to exact our punishment...and we deserved everything that she could dish out and more.

"I..can't...read you," Edward choked out, drawing me back from my mental musings. I abruptly removed my hands, smiling when Edward slid down the wall and landed on his ass on the floor. I could still hear Alice bitching at Jasper in the background, but I tuned her out, focusing solely on Edward.

"What do you mean you can't read me? You've never had any problems before, and I know for a fact that you were listening to my thoughts earlier."

"You keep going blank to me. I'll be able to hear you fine one minute, and then...nothing. It's like I hit a wall or something," he told me as he jumped to his feet and started to pace. Alice had shut her mouth by this point, and was listening intently.

"That's...strange. You think maybe Bella's around?" I asked, already knowing that she wasn't. I could feel that she was still miles away.

"I heard that," Edward said with a smile. "You know she isn't even close. Your connection to her is unique. I've never seen anything quite like it."

I silently wondered if it had something to do with the time that I spent inside her mind with her, in her dreamscape. Or had it formed before that? Possibly the first time that I smelled her human scent on the clothing that the newborns had stolen? No, even before that because I was drawn to that warehouse for a reason, and that reason was Bella.

"See, it's happening again," Edward muttered, still pacing. "Nothing. I can't hear a single thing from you now. This all started when you awoke from your...whatever the hell it was. I couldn't hear you then for a while either, but I just assumed that it was from whatever made you convulse. Speaking of which, you never did tell us what caused that."

Weird. It seemed Edward couldn't read my mind when I was thinking about what had happened the first time around. It made me wonder if perhaps it wasn't just random that I got my memories back when I did. If Bella had indeed returned my memories to me somehow, it would sort of make sense that my memories were guarded, thanks to her shield.

Something to think over later, though, because right now I was being glared at by most of the Cullen's. I opened my mouth to speak, but what came out wasn't what I had intended to say.

"Bella's almost here," I exclaimed, happy that my mate was near. She was getting closer by the second and my fingers were twitching to hold her and check her over for injuries. I had to make sure she was okay. I ran outside to meet her, and was taken completely by surprise when she launched herself at me, knocking me over backwards with her newborn strength.

"Oops. Sorry," she laughed. "I'm still getting used to the whole vampire thing."

As she spoke, I was running my hands over her, trying to make sure she was whole and safe. She rolled her eyes at me and muttered that she was just fine, but I still wanted, no, _needed_, to check for myself. And if it covered her in my scent in the process, well, that was how it should be. I wanted to roll myself on her, cover her in me until that horrid dog's stench was gone and everyone knew who she fuckin' belonged to.

Bella chuckled softly, and I realized that I was nuzzling her neck, gently running my nose against my mark on her throat. I didn't know what had caused her sudden good mood, but I wasn't about to let it go to waste. Newborn mood swings were an epic thing, and I knew that her whole demeanor could change in a split second.

"I'm sorry, kitten. So fuckin' sorry about what I said. I didn't mean it. I didn't remember," I whispered, my face still buried in her hair. I lost it then and started sobbing, and even I wasn't sure if it was out of relief that we had actually gotten another chance, or out of sorrow because I had almost fucked it up.

"You have all of eternity to make it up to me, my angel," she murmured as she held me, gently running her fingers through my hair as I sobbed into hers. She was mine, finally mine. My love, my mate, my eternity.


	32. Chapter 32

**PETER POV**

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"Bella, come in here! Let's get you out of those ruined clothes and into something else. Oh! I know just the thing," Alice shrieked, obliterating my touching moment with my mate. Bella stiffened, a low growl slipping out from between her clenched teeth.

She untangled herself from me, quickly standing up and bringing me along with her. I clenched her hand in mine like a lifeline, hoping she wouldn't deny me the contact. Her eyes softened and she smiled at me as she gently squeezed my hand. Then she turned to face Alice, her eyes instantly going black with suppressed anger. Damn, she was beautiful in her rage.

"You are so beautiful," I murmured, unable to stop myself. She turned back toward me, her face open and vulnerable. I leaned down and captured her lips in a soft kiss, pulling away to see a slightly dazed look on her face. I may have gotten just a little bit smug at that point.

"Don't get too smug over there, fucker," Jasper said with a grin. "She's a newborn, which means that she's like a kitten cranked up on catnip. She's flighty and easily volatile. She has a short attention span and is easily distracted. Anything could dazzle her right now. Watch." He pulled something out of his pocket and placed it in the palm of his hand, tightly closing his fingers around the object. He walked forward into the early morning sunlight and then opened his hand.

"Shiny!" Bella squealed and then launched herself at Jasper, ripping the keys from his hand and plopping down on her ass to examine her 'shiny'. I laughed, as did everyone else, but I seemed to be the only one to notice the calculating gleam in her crimson eyes. I had the feeling that she was playing the whole 'newborn' thing for all it was worth...and that she had a reason for it.

"Come on, Bella! Those clothes are all stained and horrid. Honestly, Bella, those were Christian Dior!" Alice exclaimed, scrunching her nose as she looked my mate up and down. I was barely able to contain the growl that threatened to tear itself out of me.

"Honestly, Alice, why do you care what I wear now? Two days ago you wanted me dead," Bella said calmly, never taking her eyes from the shiny keys that she was still playing with.

"Bella!" Alice gasped, looking to Jasper for help. Jasper was too busy trying to hide a smirk to notice Alice's gaze. His entire being was focused on the girl who sat on the grass beside him, turning a set of keys over and over in her hands. Alice huffed, not liking being ignored.

"You went against your mate, Alice," Bella said softly. "The _one_ thing that Jasper asked you for in over 50 years, you denied him because of your petty jealousy. What has he been forced to give up for you, Alice? And, yet, you denied him; held him down as he screamed in agony." Bella looked up then, staring into Alice's shocked eyes as she continued.

"All because you were so fucking insecure about yourself that you couldn't stand for him to have someone else that cared about him, even though you knew that it was in a sisterly way. Someone else who loved him no matter his faults. Because that's what family does, Alice. They love you without reserve. And they don't abandon their own."

"I-I.." Alice sputtered, truly speechless. I think we were all shocked by Bella's eerily calm words. Even though she spoke them as nothing but an emotionless statement, we could all see the fire burning in her eyes. Bella was fucking pissed.

"Bella-" Carlisle started, but was quickly cut off.

"No. Don't you 'Bella' me, Carlisle. Your turn is coming, just you wait." Bella stood up then, quickly walking to Alice. She stared deep into her eyes and smiled as she touched her middle finger to Alice's forehead. Alice instantly dropped to the ground, her body jerking violently. Before any of us could react, Bella leaned down and quickly popped Alice's big toe off of her left foot, shoving it into the pocket of her ruined jeans.

Jasper roared, his head jerking from his mate to the woman he considered a sister, his emotions conflicted. Before he had time to decide, Alice sat up and looked around. Her eyes stopped on Bella, filling with venom when they did. She hopped to her feet, grimacing when she noticed her missing toe.

"Oh, Bella! I'm sorry. So, so sorry," she sobbed, slowly approaching her and tentatively wrapping her arms around her in a tight hug. "I didn't know. I didn't remember."

"Am I supposed to just forgive you, Alice?" Bella murmured softly, her arms stiff at her side. The rest of us just stared in shock at the scene before us. Even poor Jasper was speechless, looking torn between being cautiously happy or totally freaked out by the change in Alice's emotions.

"Even if I could just forgive you...it's not as easy to forget. I need time...and a toe. All of those beautiful designer heels you have won't be getting any use for a while, will they?" Bella laughed as Alice groaned loudly, before nodding her head in agreement and whispering how sorry she was. Bella's laugh cut off abruptly as she started speaking again.

"I would say that I'll send it back to you when I feel it's time...however, I don't know if I'll honestly ever feel as if you deserve to be whole again. You really hurt me, Alice, and you know it. You left me broken, unwhole. Why shouldn't I do the same to you? And besides," Bella said as she pulled the sparkling toe from her pocket and turned it over in her hands. "I'm finding that I quite like it. I think I'll have it made into a keychain. Fuck the furry rabbit's foot, I'll have a sparkly psychic's toe."

"You wouldn't," Alice gasped, horrified. "I said I was sorry!" Bella narrowed her eyes at her.

"I would. And I'm not the only one who deserves an apology from you, Alice. You really should treat your mate better. He loves you unconditionally and he deserves better than how you treat him. Not to mention that he has to constantly deal with the bloodlust of six other vampires when he's around you and _your_ family. It's no fucking wonder that it seems harder for him to control himself, and all of you need to cut him some fucking slack. If I were you, Alice, I'd be down on my fucking knees, begging Jasper for forgiveness...before he realizes just how pathetic you really are."

Bella removed herself from Alice's embrace and walked to Jasper, who instantly opened his arms to her. She stepped into them immediately, and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Before I show you this, please know that there is nothing to forgive. I never blamed you, Jasper, and I never will. I understand, truly I do. I love you and I consider you my brother," Bella murmured to him, pulling back from the hug and looking into his eyes. And then he dropped, shaking slightly but quickly recovering himself and staring in awe at Bella.

"I tried to make it as painless as possible for you, but the new memories have to adjust so I couldn't totally remove the shock of it," she told him softly. He hugged her to him again.

"I'm so fucking sorry," he whispered against her hair, squeezing her tightly.

"I've already told you, there's nothing to be sorry for, Jasper," she whispered back.

Now, I had already caught on to what my mate was doing, but the rest of the Cullen's were watching in open-mouthed shock. Edward was looking lost, mumbling under his breath that 'it was happening again'. I chuckled to myself. Fucker complained about his mind-reading constantly, but when he's suddenly blocked out, he complains about that as well. Figures.

Bella finally turned to the other Cullen's, and cocked her head to the side. I could tell she was contemplating something, and when I saw Rose and Emmett fall to the ground at the same time, I understood. She was experimenting with her ability, pushing it to see just what she could do. It wasn't but a couple seconds later, and they were once again on their feet, staring at Bella in shock.

"Emmett, I just wanted to let you know that I always considered you the older brother that I never had...just somewhat scarier," Bella chuckled, causing Emmett to guffaw loudly. "Rose...you and Jasper are the only ones that I never truly blamed. You didn't like me and never pretended otherwise. You saw me as a danger to your family, so I could understand you leaving without so much as a 'fuck you'. You were a hateful bitch then, just as you are a hateful bitch now. But you, Emmett? You hurt me."

Bella turned to Carlisle and Esme next, not even noticing how Emmett's face crumpled at her words. Rose still just looked shocked. Carlisle and Esme never fell as they received their memories, they only jerked slightly as they stood. It seemed that Bella was getting better with every go.

"And you two...I once considered you my parents. Especially you, Esme, since my real mother has always been so flighty. But I got a very rude awakening, didn't I? Imagine my heartbreak when my whole so called 'family' up and left me without a fucking word. I didn't even get to say goodbye," Bella said softly, voice almost cracking with emotion.

"Now, Bella-" Carlisle started before he was once again cut off by Bella vehemently shaking her head.

"No, Carlisle. You aren't my father and you aren't my coven leader. Any parental respect that I felt for you died long ago. You have no right to speak to me in that haughty tone. I hate to tell ya Carlisle, but I find your so-called 'gift' of compassion to be somewhat lacking." And with that, she turned her back on them both and turned to face Edward.

"But that was nothing compared to what you did. You shredded my heart into pieces, Edward, you and your fucking distractions. I hope you found what you were looking for, because I sure as shit wasn't it." And then he fell, convulsing on the grass. It lasted at least a full minute before he went still. Bella looked down at him with an unreadable expression; a strange mixture of pain and satisfaction. The little minx had made sure that his memories weren't easily returned.

"I've honestly thought about hurting you Edward, about marring your perfect body so you'll always have a reminder of this day...of me. In the end, though, I decided that you just aren't worth it. You don't deserve to have a piece of me with you for eternity, even if it was just a scar on your skin. You don't even get that much of me."

"Bella," he choked out, looking up at her in wonder. A multitude of emotions flowed across his face, before finally settling on heart-wrenching agony. It was fucking painful to watch as he both gained my angel's love and lost it in the space of a few moments. I couldn't help but pity the fucker, just a little. To be shown heaven, only to learn that you were actually stupid enough to refuse it...it would be hell.

My girl turned away from him then, running to me and letting my arms envelop her. I leaned down and kissed the top of her head lightly, smiling as she nuzzled into my neck. I looked up at the vampires that my mate had once called her family. She had destroyed them with her words, I observed as I watched Carlisle try to comfort Esme as she fell to the ground and started sobbing.

"Are you finished?" I asked her simply. I knew that everything that she had said and done was necessary for her to make peace within herself. She needed to truly let her past go, in order to move on with our future together...even if it did leave the Cullen family in fuckin' shambles. It wasn't like they didn't once leave Bella in the same condition.

"Mostly," she sighed. "I missed you so fucking much."

"Me, too, kitten. Me, too," I murmured, squeezing her tighter. "Now, what's this I'm picking up about wolf dung?" Bella giggled, fucking _giggled_, as she pulled back so she could look me in the eyes, both of us dubiously ignoring the sobbing mess that Bella had turned the Cullen's into.

"Let's just say that James and Victoria are going to have a very shitty eternity."


	33. Chapter 33

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_Epilogue_

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_3 Years Later_

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**Peter POV**

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"Rose, you fuckin' bitch! Get back here with those panties!" Bella shrieked. I chuckled as I watched the cat in question streak past me, my girl's favorite pair of lacy red thongs hangin' from her mouth.

"Here kitty, kittty," she called loudly, glaring at me as she searched. "Come here you little bitch. You can be my midnight snack."

"Now, kitten." I walked up behind her and enclosed her in my arms. "I love you," I murmured softly, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"I love you, too," she replied, spinning in my arms to give me a proper kiss. "But your panty-thieving cat has got to go. That's the fourth pair this week. I even hid that pair in a different drawer!"

I went to reply when the aforementioned panty-thieving cat came prancing back into the room. I couldn't help but laugh as she all but strutted up to Bella and dropped a small, red piece of lace at her feet. If I didn't know better, I would've swore the cat smirked at me before streaking off again, heading towards our bedroom as Bella shrieked and picked up the small scrap of fabric mournfully.

"I am going to _eat_ you, Rose! I am going to slurp you up like a little kitty juice box! Even Jasper won't be able to protect you from my wrath. I'll tell him you fried your stupid kitty brain and drowned yourself in the pond!" I smiled as she took off after the cat once more¸ still yelling abuse.

The past three years have been nothing short of perfection in my opinion. After staging Bella's death, we spent a couple days with the Cullen's because Bella insisted on practicing her memory manipulation ability before we left. After guilting the mind reader into helping her, it only took her a matter of hours before she figured out what she had been desperately trying to learn. I think I was the only one besides Edward that figured out why she felt it was necessary to learn to shield specific memories from talented vampires before leaving Forks.

The next morning we slipped into the woods and took off running towards Charlie's house. Kitten stopped short when she saw Charlie sitting on the porch, head in his hands as he sobbed. She took a deep breath, and let out a low appreciative sound. My arms around her waist tightened, ready to haul her ass back into the woods if need be. Couldn't let her go munchin' on family, after all.

However, I should have known that my Kitten would surprise me. When has she ever done what was normal? So instead of the raging newborn blood lust that I had expected, I was met with her sighing exasperatedly while she wiggled to get free and go to her father. I was still slightly disbelieving until she turned in my arms and smacked me upside the head while informing me that just because humans smelled good, it didn't mean she wanted to eat them. "I like the smell of flowers, too, Peter, but do you see me munching on the roses? No, me thinks not."

Charlie took the news exceptionally well, happy to overlook the small matter of Bella's vampireness simply because it meant she wasn't dead. She told him everything, and I swear Kitten must've gotten her lack of self-preservation from Charlie, because as soon as he heard that I had been the one to change her as she lay dying from the car crash, he immediately jumped up and gave me a big hug. I honestly don't know who was more surprised at his actions, me or him. His face turned scarlet and he patted my shoulder awkwardly before thanking me again and retreating back to Bella's side.

He now saves up his vacation time every year to take a three week vacation to Canada to go "fly fishing." And while we do occasionally actually go fly fishing, he spends the majority of his time lying around the cabin, catching up with Bella and fucking around with Garrett. I think it was a surprise to all of us just how much he liked the stupid fucker. Of course, it probably had something to do with all the embarrassing shit that Garrett spewed to him about me. Every single time that I walk out the door to go hunt, Charlie now laughingly warns me to "Watch out for the big bad trees, Purty Peter!" Assholes, the lot of them.

Speaking of assholes, it's about time for Jasper's monthly visit. When we left Forks, Jasper actually came and stayed with us for a couple months before going back to work things out with Alice. I love my sire, I truly do, but I swear he makes it his personal mission to cockblock me. He makes a fuckin' game out of it, thinks it's funny. At least with Garrett and Charlotte they have the sense to just leave the cabin for a couple of hours….or days. I suppose I should just be grateful he only comes one weekend a month.

Kitten still won't let any of the other Cullen's come to our home. She will talk to them on the phone occasionally but as for the actual forgiving them process—yeah, that's extremely slow going. At least Alice finally got her toe back….after nine months. Bella honestly decided to send it back to her after a few weeks of watching it twitch around, but Rose obviously had other ideas. Sometimes I think that cat is smarter than us all. As soon as Bella told me she was going to send it back to her, the cat snatched it and jetted outside. We found it months later buried in the dirt under a tree that Rose frequently used as her litter box. Alice swears up and down that it still smells like cat shit even after all this time.

_Incoming! _One of the voices in my head yelled, pulling me from my thoughts. I shifted through the voices easily, trying to detect anything that would help me figure out what was coming.

_Danger! _A female voice screamed.

_Be cautious! _An older male voice warned.

And that was that, the voices fell silent once more and I debated asking Kitten if her voices had any input on the matter. After all, she did have two now. My grumpy voice (who Bella had now dubbed Hefner) somehow managed to 'jump ship' during one of our marathon sex sessions. To say it freaked Bella the fuck out would be an understatement. She later told me that it was creepy to have a grumpy old man's voice suddenly appear in her head keeping a running commentary on her sexual noises. I think she's grown to like him now, though. Last week she told me him and Bunny had finally taken the plunge and started having marathons of their own. She said she even managed to section off a corner of her mindscape so they could have their own private 'bedroom' of sorts and she wouldn't have to listen to them anymore. I took off out of the room faster than a cat can lick it's ass because, yeah, I _really_ didn't need to hear that shit.

A knock at the door pulled me from my thoughts once again. As I pulled open the door, I was really fuckin' hoping that it was Jasper but the sickening feeling in the pit of my gut told me otherwise. And of course, because fate is a spiteful fucking bitch that hates me, it wasn't Jasper.

I drew in a quick hiss between my teeth as I recognized the blonde vampire standing on our doorstep. I had met her once before when she came to deliver a warning to Maria. Facts that Jasper had once drilled into my head decades ago returned. Anne. Volturi. Cauis' pet. Unknown gift. Powerful. Dangerous.

"Peter," she murmured. "And so we meet again."

That voice….oh, that _voice_. I should have recognized it sooner! I straightened my posture and gazed warily at her.

"Anne. Thank you for everything you have done for us." My voice was formal, cautious. I knew from Jasper just how much energy certain gifts took from their hosts. I wondered just how many years of storing up power it took to reset time as far as she had for us. I also wondered just what the price of it would now be.

Not that it mattered, I thought, as I glanced inside the house at my Kitten as she threatened to make a snack out of Rose for the forty-third time that day, seemingly oblivious to the fact that there was an unknown vampire standing on our porch. I was probably the only one to notice that her head was cocked slightly towards us, listening; her beautiful body strung tight, ready to pounce in our direction if need be; her cell phone hidden behind her back as she sends out a text message for help, even as she continues to berate her cat. I couldn't help but smile with love and pride. To quote Hefner, my woman was a hellcat.

"I thought you might have recognized my voice, Peter dear. Good, that will make this all so much easier." She turned around as we both heard Charlotte and Garrett come running up, Char with her phone still in hand. It was her that Kitten had texted, then.

Anne shifted, uncomfortable with the odds now, but continued on in her cool voice.

"As I'm sure you've concluded, my gift is not one to be used on a whim. You couldn't imagine the amount of energy it takes to do what I did for you, and while I will admit that I did have ulterior motives for helping you and your mate, there is still the matter of repayment. I am here to collect."

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_End_

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Well, that's the end of this story arc. Sorry it took so long to finish this chapter, I ended up having to re-read the whole story. Will there be a sequel? Probably, but not for a while. I will be working on completing the stories that I have already started before I start any more. Hope you enjoyed my first fanfiction. I definitely learned a lot writing it, and met some wonderful people. Thank you all for your continued support!

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